(PDF) First Contacts with People in Crisis & Spiritual Emergencies

FIRST CONTACTS

WITH

PEOPLE IN CRISIS

&

SPIRITUAL EMERGENCIES

COURTENAY YOUNG

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FIRST CONTACTS

WITH

PEOPLE IN CRISIS

&

SPIRITUAL EMERGENCIES

A Handbook about and for

People Experiencing Various Sorts of

Psychological, Emotional

& Spiritual Crisis,

Spiritual Emergence Processes,

Spiritual Emergencies,

And especially also

For their Carers & Therapists

Courtenay Young

CONTENTS page

Introduction 3

PART ONE

Types of Crisis 8

Crisis or Emergency 10

Emergency Situations 11

Identifying a Person in Crisis 12

Possible Indications or Symptoms of People in Crisis 13

Levels of Crisis 18

Making Contact and Staying in Contact 20

What to Do at First 22

Use of Psychotherapy 26

Appropriate Action 28

Other Ways of Working With A Crisis 29

Forming a Crisis Group 32

Forming a Community Around a Person in Crisis 33

Some Basic Strategies 35

A “Zen” Space 36

Meditation & Mindfulness 37

Transformative Processes 41

PART TWO

Spiritual Emergencies 43

Criteria to Help Define a Spiritual Emergency 48

Symptoms or Types of Spiritual Emergence Processes 50

Crisis as seen in Transformational Terms 60

Spiritual Technologies and Toolkits 61

Madness Seen Differently 67

Some Self-Help Exercises 74

Meditation: The Body That Brought Me Here 75

Meditation: The Castle of the Spirit 76

Exercise: Rebuilding your Auric Boundary 77

Meditation: Dynamic Meditation 78

Exercise: Death Fantasies and How They Stop You Living 79

Exercise: The Felt Sense of Self 80

Meditation: A Descent into the Dark 84

Basic Spiritual Principles 87

Recovery and Integration 101

The Spirit of the Body and the Body of the Spirit 103

Crucial Support Issues 105

Some Caveats 111

The Rainbow 113

Transformation & Enlightenment 117

Quotations 118

ADDENDA

Resource List 126

Book List 130

Appendix 1: Spiritual Emergencies in DSM4: Internet article 136

Appendix 2: Different Facets of the Sense of Self 140

About the Author 143

INTRODUCTION

Our Western society does not fully acknowledge the process of spiritual

maturation, to the extent that there is hardly even a proper language for much of

this material, and to the extent that people who have experienced problems with

this maturational process are often seen as unstable or insane, and are thus

discriminated against, or even condemned. The actual process of spiritual

maturation or emergence has itself long been marginalized in the West: it has also

often been removed from any ‘normal’ realms by sanctification or beatification.

But, at least in the last 100 years or so, the process of emotional and

psychological maturation has developed its own particular language, and many of

the concepts from these processes have been relatively well accepted, if little

understood, by society at large. Jung’s concept of ‘individuation’, for example, is

the concept whereby an ‘individuated’ person has worked through most of their

childhood dependencies and neurotic attachments and has emerged as a

reasonably functioning adult individual. However, in the arena of spiritual

maturation, we are unfortunately still pretty much in the Dark Ages.

Many of the symptoms of a spiritual maturational process happen unnoticed:

a gradual loss of interest in the religion of one’s original family, followed by a

growing interest, as an adult, in something that feels more meaningful. This may,

or may not, be another established religion, or d belief system. For some, however,

the changes are much more dramatic. The symptoms may be similar to a psychotic

episode, or it may take a major crisis for us to understand that the old familiar

ways of doing and being are becoming increasingly dysfunctional; or the person

may suddenly make significant changes their whole lifestyle. This handbook is

written for these people, and their families and friends.

More primitive societies more readily acknowledge that when a young man or

woman has a “big dream” for the tribe, or falls into a coma and then awakens with

wonderful tales of what has happened to them whilst asleep, or shows particular

aptitudes for divination or healing, that these ‘symptoms’ are indications that their

spiritual maturational process is starting (their spirit is emerging) and they are

then given the appropriate training from the elders, shamans, priestesses, and so

forth. If the societal structure has been destroyed, or the society is largely secular,

and these symptoms are not recognised as such, then they can be misinterpreted

as aberrations.

In the 1970’ & 1980’s, a Czech psychiatrist, Stanislav Grof, working with his

wife Christina at Esalen, a community in Big Sur, California, coined the phrase

“Spiritual Emergency” to describe these ‘normal’ spiritual emergence processes that

seemed to be going wrong. This does not mean to say that there is something

wrong with the person involved; often it is the society around them that has not

been recognizing what is happening to that person. In an increasingly materialistic

society, the echelons of that society, the priests and especially the medical

profession, doctors and psychiatrists, see the signs and symptoms of these

spiritual maturation or emergence processes nowadays, not as signs to be

recognised, but as a threat to the ‘stability’ of the society, or to their ‘power

positions, So, they ‘diagnose’ them (because of their ignorance of these processes)

either as signs of demonic possession (needing their powers of exorcism) or as

symptoms of potential pathologies.

Imagine if we– as a culture – did not acknowledge the symptoms of the

physical maturation process of puberty and adolescence, so that facial hair and

growing breasts were seen as aberrations, fashion demanded bound chests and

underarm shaving, or, in extreme cases, as medical interventions requiring

depilation or mastectomies. Something similar quite often happens to people in

these situations of Spiritual Emergency whose symptoms are not recognised.

In James Hillman’s book, The Soul’s Code, he theorizes that we all have this

innate potential. But if you have been brought up to be ‘safe’ and ‘conventional’,

then you will not allow the symptoms to emerge as even possibilities. You might

worry about being ‘different’ and go to a conventional psychotherapist, to have this

problem analysed or to learn, cognitively, how to change your behaviour. This way

you might stay safe a little bit longer. But then – you ‘world’ changes and nothing is

ever the same again. The ‘symptoms’ have overwhelmed you. Resisting the process,

like damming a river, doesn’t always work.

This handbook was originally written, in a much shorter format, as a manual

for the staff of the Findhorn Foundation, an international spiritual & educational

community in Northeast Scotland. It has been re-written and developed over the

last 17-20 years, based on a great deal of practical and professional experience,

rather than being based on abstract theory. I have also based this material on the

experience of teaching this many times to psychotherapists, trainees, workshop

participants and community members. The material tries to be pragmatic, always,

and (of course) is always changing and being added to.

Part One describes & defines what is meant by a crisis, any crisis, and gives some

ideas as to what to do if or when someone you know or are working with goes into

such a crisis. Much of this material is traditional, mainstream and fairly pragmatic.

Because of the fear of these ‘unknown’ areas in the general collective; because of

the discrimination against mental illness; because of our lack of understanding of

altered states or the world of spirit; so people generally do not know what to do

with a person in crisis unless they have been specifically trained, as a clinician, or

in the mental health field. Some of this section helps to demystify these processes

and can act as a sort of manual for carers, etc.

Part Two goes much deeper into the concept of Spiritual Emergence processes and

some of their ramifications. I have separated the two aspects out this way as, if

someone is in a crisis, psychological, relationship, financial, spiritual or otherwise,

then the pragmatic material in Part One is probably necessary, first and foremost.

However many people will be more interested in starting to read the slightly more

theoretical, or possibly attractive, aspects contained in Part Two. However, don’t do

any work with people until you have also read Part One. They do hang together and

complement each other.

It is very inspiring to work in this field in these different ways. It is also an

incredible privilege and opportunity to be, in some ways, both selected as a channel

for this material and has also discovered a way of making it more ordinary and

‘normal’. I believe this material, and the whole process of Spiritual Emergence, is

our normal human birthright, our spiritual heritage, and is not limited to any

particular religion, sect, community, or to people who go into crisis. It should be

part of normal and healthy development for everyone to open up to these realms,

even though, in the moment, sometimes we have to have a bit of a crisis in order to

drive out any old and redundant material that the world requires us to “know” in

order to “do”, and allow in the new, very personal, and unique material that allows

us to “be” different and truly ourselves.

Some of this material forms the basis for training modules that I have given

internationally, mainly to psychotherapy trainees, on Spiritual Emergencies and

crisis work, and in seminars and workshops that I give at psychotherapy

conferences. Some of it is very newly written material, and deals with basic

spiritual principles, many of which are very old and fundamental truths. My wife,

Laura Steckler, a Clinical Psychologist and Body-Oriented Psychotherapist, as well

as a dancer & performance artist, and I together have developed some of this

material into a residential workshop format for members of the public, which we

call The Spirit of the Body. The Findhorn Foundation also works with some of this

material, in this way of thinking, and with similar material in its own particular

method of spiritual practice, as a fairly well defined spiritual and educational path.

I whole-heartedly support this method of ‘normalization’. Anyone who wants to can

come and do a programme, work alongside members of the community, and see

and feel how this material can be applied on a day-to-day basis.

Whether you are recycling your glass and cardboard, or eating organic food,

or trying to save the world, or working with someone in crisis, or in a crisis or

emergency, the principles are still very relevant. But for some people, either it is

important or necessary, or maybe it just happens, that they are on a different life

path, or they jumped the “Spiritual Maturation101” and found themselves in the

wrong grade, and need a “crash course” to catch up; or maybe they are just in the

wrong school., or they feel that they are even on the wrong planet. They are

experiencing a crisis instead of the regular steady developmental programme of a

gently unfolding spiritual emergence process. And they are in a different process;

their world has changed – and the process of change can sometimes be dramatic

and painful, as well as incredibly beautiful.

There are no particular rules of “how” to go through these processes; we just

work with each individual situation as we find it. More and more, people are having

these situations at home and in their own environments, without coming to

Findhorn, or Esalen, or going to India, or taking drugs, and also without getting

taken off to their local psychiatric ward. Thankfully, it is becoming much more

“normal”, and this is the new way that we must, I think, all begin to look at all

these processes.

Unfortunately, there are still tendencies to hang on to the feelings of

‘specialness’, the mystery, or to consider oneself as blessed, privileged or, in some

way, superior by having access to this material, or to charge large amounts of

money for a particular form of initiation. In the past, people have made a ‘mystery’

out of it and only ‘initiated’ certain people into these mysteries. This should not be

the case any longer, even if it was appropriate or legitimate at some earlier time. We

have to make this material, this ‘stuff’, much more normal and accessible. It is our

spiritual ‘birthright’.

Our Western society also needs these particular energies in order for it to

change; in order for it to mature; in order for it to redress the balance between

“doing” or “having”, and “being”; the balance between hatred and acceptance; the

balance between war and peace; the balance between hopes for sanity and acts of

insanity.

We need to disseminate the essential spirituality embedded in these

processes and to find these being reflected in our social lives, as we try to cope with

these new spiritual technologies and a new world order, especially as a result of the

processes of increasing globalization and the more recent events of September 11,

2001, the Gulf Wars, and the global warming and resultant desertification of the

planet. This sort of esoteric material needs to become the “norm” rather than the

exception. Archbishop Desmond Tutu says: “The wonderful thing is that God has

placed in each of us a hunger, a hunger for transcendence. A hunger for the thing

your heart is restless for until you find it.”

The increasing acceptance of ‘spiritual’ people into mainstream society like

Carl Jung, Rudolf Steiner, the Dalai Lama, Mother Theresa and even Eileen Caddy,

one of the founders of the Findhorn Foundation recently awarded the MBE for

“services to spirit”, gives us all hope. There are many things wrong with the

present, and with the New Age movement that seems to epitomize this search for

spirit, but it also reflects a growing need for material, which is relevant today,

rather than a religion that became codified many hundreds of years ago.

These processes also have great power – the power to change, to awaken the

inner spirit, the power to transcend, or the power to wreck people’s lives. This

power can be awesome. But then so is electricity, and nowadays we think nothing

of turning on a light switch, when to have this facility, this instant power, would

have been considered a miracle to our cave-dwelling ancestors. Maybe it is all to do

with how we perceive the light, or how we relate to that which casts those shadows

that dance on the wall. Often these shadows are just problems within ourselves,

and we are facing the wrong way: we are just not looking at “The Light”.

Please don’t make the mistake of thinking that this is all to do with someone

else. Yes, they may be having a crisis, even a spiritual one, but it will almost

inevitably affect you as well, and thus some of this material will become part of

your process, your life, your transformation. Your reactions will reverberate with

them and facilitate or hinder their process; and you will also affect others. The

ripples spread once the stone has been dropped in the pond.

And how we use this material is also very important. We can view our glass as

half-full, or half-empty. A crisis can be an opportunity, a side-track, or a disaster.

Here is the story about the Four Rabbinim:

One night, four rabbinim were visited by an angel who awakened them and carried them up to

the Seventh Vault of the Seventh Heaven. There they beheld the sacred Wheel of Ezekiel.

Somewhere in the descent from Pardes (Paradise) to Earth, one Rabbi, having seen such

splendor, lost his mind and wandered frothing and foaming until the end of his days. The

second Rabbi was extremely cynical: “Oh I just dreamed Ezekiel’s Wheel, that was all. Nothing

really happened.” The third Rabbi carried on and on about what he had seen, for he was totally

obsessed. He believed he had been especially ‘chosen’. Think he was particularly special, he

talked and lectured, and would not stop with his theories about how it was all constructed, and

what it all meant …and, in this way, he went astray and betrayed his faith. The fourth Rabbi,

who was a poet, took a paper in hand and a reed and sat near the window writing song after

song praising the evening dove, his daughter in her cradle, and all the stars in the firmament.

And he lived his life better than before.

So, in this new landscape of the spirit, I can only wish that you “Journey Well!”

Courtenay Young

Findhorn & Edinburgh

2003-2010

PART ONE

TYPES OF CRISIS

A crisis is defined as occurring: "… when a person faces an obstacle to important life

goals that is, for a time, insurmountable through the utilization of (their) customary

methods of problem solving. A period of disorganization ensues, a period of upset,

during which many abortive attempts at solution are made."

Caplan: An approach to community mental health.

This is a description of the process, but there are many different forms that a crisis

can take. These include: some of the following

Different types of crisis:

• Death of a parent, a child or close family member (this can include a pet

animal); deep grief at such; not being able to ‘complete’ the grief process

• Sudden loss: … of job, home, role, status, finance, marriage/relationship,

security, integrity, self-image, world view, faith or trust

• A serious physical illness (possibly life-threatening, like cancer, heart attack,

diabetes, etc), major operations, chronic conditions, serious disability

• A substantive change in mental/emotional stability: depression, schizophrenia,

bi-polar, character disorder, episodic psychosis, borderline cases,

repressed memories

• Serious upset to equilibrium: redundancy, burn-out, premature events, loss of

expectations, or a with feelings of malfunctioning or powerlessness

• A series of continuing stressful life situations or events, none of them being

crises in themselves, but that collectively accumulate to exceed one’s

normal capacity to cope

• Maturational crises: adolescence, menopause, retirement, old age – often

creating forms of isolation: a crisis to a ‘social animal’

• A substantive change in one’s life circumstances: loss of job; economic or

financial crisis; imprisonment; onset of severe illness; marriage ending;

partner’s infidelity; serious legal case; an (often unfair) accusation or

dispute with neighbours or employers or co-workers, traumatization

* Accidents and disasters: people experiencing disasters now commonly receive

counselling

• Physical abuse: rape, violence, mugging, childhood sexual abuse and recovered

memories of such

• Substance abuse: drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, other (often psychotropic)

substances

• Suicide attempts or patterns of self-harming

• Social upsets: economic depression, war, riots, political crises

* Western society is in a crisis: enforced need for continuing economic growth;

being flooded with (often negative) news; informational overload;

increasing materialism; social alienation; isolation

* Environmental changes: increasing desertification, global warming

• Acts of God: fire, flood, earthquake, storm, famine, plague

• Family (systemic) crisis: child abuse, death in family, divorce, breaking of co-

dependencies, uncovering of secrets

• A build-up of different factors: moving house and a new baby and losing one’s

job

* A culmination point of an increasingly dramatic process, where often a point of

‘no return’ is reached and unwanted change seems inevitable,

• Existential crisis – an often quite sudden loss of sense of self; finding no raison

d'être, loss of any meta-perspective or sense of ‘knowing’, or a having

spiritual emergency – often as a result of one or more of the above

Please remember that a "mild" crisis is probably both necessary and essential to

any form of substantive developmental change or growth. It can help us lift

ourselves up out of the rut we’ve gotten ourselves into and inspire us to develop.

Remember the old maxim: What doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger! (Attributed to

Friedrich Nietzsche).

Growth involves change: if the caterpillar gets ‘stuck’ in its present form, it will not

metamorphose into a butterfly, but it cannot imagine the change that is about to

happen and what its new form will be. It might feel in a crisis if it could so imagine.

There is thus a whole “unknown” aspect to any substantive change process, and

this is very scary. This is why we see tend to see these change processes as a crisis:

the change is substantive, often quite sudden and contains an ‘unknown’ element.

Once we ‘know’ that this is a “change process”, the critical (crisis) component – and

the accompanying fear – often diminishes

Thus the most helpful thing that can happen is for the ‘crisis’ to have become

identified as a crisis as early as possible. This allows our “normal” coping strategies

(which will not be able to cope) to cease; the fear to diminish a little, and whatever

"crisis strategies" that exist to come into play and thus the negative effects of the

crisis are less likely to be to be compounded and the appropriate support systems

can then be identified and mobilized. As the crisis diminishes, normal support

systems become ready to be activated again.

All these things can happen to any one of us: and many of them will actually

happen, one way or another. Life is essentially difficult. Sometimes we will cope

with one of these, or some of these, reasonably well, but then something else will

come, seemingly out of the blue, and throw us totally ‘off-base’ and wham: our

world has changed. It seems as if nothing will ever be the same again. Do we go

under; or act (like Lot in The Bible) and just bemoan our woes; or do we face the

challenge, see where it will take us, and start to grow?

At a psychotherapy conference, 17th EAP Congress, 2010 in Bucharest, Romania

on “Crisis: Change or Challenge” I wrote a little comment, perhaps even a sort of

‘koan’ on the title:

I expect to be challenged and to be forced to change:

I fear to be changed, as this is often a challenge:

I also – somewhat surprisingly – look forward to both.

CRISIS OR EMERGENCY

It may be worth noting here, before we go any further, the traditional definitions of

or distinctions between a crisis and an emergency:

• An emergency should be able to be resolved within about 36 hours - that is

to say the person should be able to cope by themselves, or get into a

situation where they can cope with ‘normal’ support and (possibly) with some

recuperative care, within that time period.

• A crisis may still be occurring after 36 hours and will not end until the

person can start to cope with their life situation as well as, or better than,

before they went into the crisis.

It is more than possible to have both going at the same time. An ongoing crisis can

suddenly become escalated into an emergency situation. The emergency can then

be resolved and be got through, and yet there is no resolution to the ongoing crisis

situation.

There is another definition, which uses these concepts of crisis and emergency, and

which will be dealt with later in the second part of the book: that of a “Spiritual

Emergence” process that goes astray and then becomes a “Spiritual Emergency”.

A crisis can happen to anyone at any time. The chances are that we will have

several in our lifetime. They can be seen as something almost natural, inevitable

even (like Life Crises); something that we might have contributed to (Personal

Crisis); something to overcome (Environmental Crisis or Disaster); something to

learn from; something to endure or survive. It has become a crisis because our

‘normal’ survival techniques are not working. We may survive, but things may not

be the same.

An emergency is when there is a severe risk that we might not survive; or that

things might never be the same again. In an emergency situation you will almost

certainly, absolutely and definitely, need some form of external or specialized help.

It is good to get some help in a crisis: mainly because it is not easy to get through a

crisis by yourself. However, it may just be possible to get through a crisis by

yourself. This is another distinction between a crisis and emergency.

Remember another good indicator of a crisis is whether or not the person can stay

in reasonable contact with other people around them. If they can’t, then that

person is almost certainly in a crisis. In an emergency situation, the person may

not be able to do anything to help themselves, and they also may be, in some way,

totally out of touch. There is no proper contact.

EMERGENCY SITUATIONS

It is very important to differentiate between a crisis and an emergency. There are

certain things that you (or anyone without very specialized training) cannot and

should not and must not try to cope with. These are real EMERGENCY situations

& include: OVERDOSE OF DRUGS or MEDICATION;

PHYSICAL VIOLENCE;

DESTRUCTION OF PROPERTY;

SELF-INFLICTED INJURIES, or SUICIDE ATTEMPTS;

IMMEDIATELY have someone call the police, ambulance or doctor. These are the

proper people to deal with such emergencies. Don’t try to emulate their training

and experience. It does not matter if it was only a very minor incident, just call. The

person involved is likely to be unpredictable and might repeat this behaviour (try

again) in a moment, or as soon as your back is turned.

You can still help the person in the emergency situation, as the responses of

the emergency services will be often limited only to the emergency situation. You

can help by giving the emergency services a balanced account of the situation;

going with the person to the hospital or police station; having access to a mobile

phone or a credit card; or just being there to act as an advocate or a caring person

(maybe only holding their hand whilst others do what is necessary). In addition, all

the after-care, and lots of it, will probably be needed from someone like you. By

calling the Emergency Services, it does not mean that you are surrendering the

ability to help, or that they will cut you out of the web of support. In fact, as a

family member or friend, you will probably be indispensable.

Your choice to call for emergency assistance ensures access, at the right

time, to the right type of trained people with the skills and awareness to cope with

this very specialized, and potentially dangerous situation.

In an EMERGENCY SITUATION:

• Do not leave the person alone, if possible, even for a moment. Try to have

other people present and in attendance at all times.

• There is a very high probability that the emergency situation will re-occur or

get worse within the very near future. That is why it is an emergency. So,

make the call as soon as possible.

• It is absolutely your responsibility to make sure the Emergency Services are

called. Don’t assume someone else will make the call. Act now.

• Even if the person in crisis begs and pleads with you not to, as difficult as

this might be, still make the call. Part of their crisis may be that they don’t

fully realize that this is a crisis, which is a very dangerous situation. There

has already been evidence of one of the above crisis situations: it may re-

occur at any moment, despite their protestations. Make the call.

• If you are not sure if any the above conditions are happening, just make the

call anyway. The emergency services themselves would prefer you to get it

wrong, and it proving not to be an emergency, rather than not making the

call and it proving to be a real emergency. Make the call.

• If it has been a very minor incident of one of the four above, make the call

anyway. It can reoccur in a moment; worse next time. Call now!

IDENTIFYING A PERSON IN CRISIS

There are a number of indications, which can inform you that someone is in or is

approaching a crisis. These are mainly emotional/psychological aspects. It may not

be particularly significant if only one type is apparent (as we all have our odd

moments); however the more types or indications that are apparent, or that can be

d, can be an indication of the extent or the depth of the person’s crisis.

The 9 main categories to watch out for are;

1. ABUSE OF DRUGS OR MEDICATIONS

2. INABILITY TO MAINTAIN CONTACT WITH CONSENSUS REALITY

3. LACK OF AWARENESS OF & RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN PROCESS

4. EXTRAORDINARY OR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOUR

5. LACK OF FIRM BOUNDARIES OR ADHERANCE TO AGREEMENTS

6. UNUSUAL LEVELS OF NEED OR DEMAND

7. CONTINUED EMOTIONAL CATHARSIS or CONTINUED WITHDRAWAL

8. LACK OF REAL CONTACT

9. NEGLECT OF THE SELF

(For fuller explanations of these see next pages.)

The First Rule that accompanies an emotional or physical crisis is that the

person in crisis in increasingly unable to maintain normal emotional or relational

contact.

A Second Rule is that, if someone else experiences the same, or a similar,

reaction on a different occasion with that person, both your reactions are possibly

correct and that person is in or is approaching a crisis.

A Third Rule is that, if the person is getting into crisis and being

increasingly less able to cope, then the situation is more than likely to get worse

than to get better.

A Fourth Rule is that the person in crisis often feels that their signals

(sometimes unconscious, often a cry for help) are not being responded to properly,

so they end up having to exaggerate them. They themselves are not sure what is

happening. They don’t know how to cope. And they may not know how to ask for

help properly or directly.

Therefore calling in a professional to help them is not an indication of failure,

but is possibly a means to a successful intervention and a beneficial outcome.

It is impossible to overemphasize the importance of a timely intervention. An early

intervention often does NOT result in a significant period of time in a psychiatric

hospital. Later interventions sometimes do, and then the person in crisis has to get

over the effects of that as well.

So Please, Please Do Something Sooner Rather Than Later!

POSSIBLE INDICATIONS OR SYMPTOMS OF PEOPLE IN CRISIS

Please remember - the following examples are only examples. This is not an

exclusive list. It is not a diagnostic. Also anyone behaving in any one of these

categories may just be having a bit of a hard time. Check it out. Just ask. Many times

people will appreciate your awareness and concern.

Often the person is perfectly aware of what is happening or what has just happened,

and are in reasonable control, and can give you a very clear, appropriate and

satisfactory response. This is then possibly not a crisis. This sort of response has a

very different feeling to it than some form of a justification, evasion, defensiveness, or

something like an attempt to cover-up a crisis situation

1. ABUSE OF DRUGS OR MEDICATIONS:

Examples of behaviour in this category include:

a) Going off (psychotropic) medications without proper safeguards, or

supervision, or suddenly and without the full agreement of a medical

practitioner. These can even precipitate a psychosis. e.g. Lithium, Valium,

Anti-depressants

b) Mixing homeopathic, herbal or alternative remedies and pharmaceutical

medications, without consent from or consultation with qualified practitioners

or a doctor. Sometimes these DO NOT mix well.

c) A seeming carelessness about taking (or not taking) medication, about

dosages, or mixing medications (as above), especially combined with some of

the more socially approved drugs such as alcohol, which can potentiate some

psychotropic medications.

d) An over-indulgence of drugs or medications or remedies or alcohol - "over-dose"

is the classic extreme; drunkenness is also a very common example. Heavy or

addictive smoking may be indicative of a latent crisis: pill-popping is another.

2. INABILITY TO MAINTAIN CONTACT WITH CONCENSUS REALITY:

Examples of this include:

a) Spacing out and not being able to "space back in" or “come back to earth”

when requested or when directly addressed.

b) Having delusions, visions, altered states, etc. without a lot of control and

without really realizing that they are delusional or altered states.

c) If someone gets very angry (or fearful) or if their latent anger (or fear) from

their past experiences, which has not been dealt with, is triggered by a present

situation, then they may be unable to see that their present anger (or fear) is

inappropriate to the existing "fault" (or "threat").

d) A very exaggerated viewpoint, often about the significance of themselves,

another person, or other events, that bears very little relation to the views of

many other people around them. These points can include suddenly falling in

‘love’ totally inappropriately, or becoming obsessed with someone, positively or

negatively, and giving up their normal lifestyle without any preparation, like

joining a sect, or fanatical fan-club, or becoming a ‘stalker’.

e) Classical paranoia is an obvious example of not being in touch with

‘consensus reality’ - but it is rarely found. What is much more common is a

form of continual blaming of situations and events onto other people; being a

continual victim; and a holding onto this blame despite reassurances or

evidence to the contrary; and a seeming inability to accept responsibility for

one’s own actions. This links to ...

3. LACK OF AWARENESS OF AND RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN PROCESS:

Examples include:

a) Constant blaming. The person cannot or will not accept responsibility for their

part. It is always someone else at fault.

b) The classic victim statement. "This happened to me - and it was terrible. Then

this happened to me and that was even worse." This is often repeated without

the sort of "owning" statement: "I did this" or "then I made this mistake".

c) The repetition syndrome: "Everywhere I go, this happens." “This is the fourth

time this month…” “Nobody ever…”

d) There is a significant difference between responsibility for, and responsibility

to (also see later). People need to be responsible for their own actions: and

they need to be responsible to everyone else.

e) A seeming total indifference towards the effects of their actions, or inactions,

on other people or of their ‘normal’ responsibilities to friends, family,

commitments, etc.

4. EXTRAORDINARY OR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOUR: Examples of

inappropriate behaviour, like all of these classifications, are not significant in

themselves as they occur quite often in most people on occasions. They are only

significant if found in conjunction with other examples. We all have our

moments. Examples include:

a) A person sharing deeply confidential or intimate details at first

acquaintanceship or in a non-intimate situation.

b) A person offering to involve themselves much too much, often with one's

private life, and from a relatively casual acquaintanceship.

c) A person under- or over-reacting emotionally to a situation which involves

such emotions as anger, sadness, enthusiasm, defensiveness, etc. where the

emotion is appropriate but the level of emotion is not, or perhaps where the

length of time is not appropriate (either too little or too great)..

d) A person not doing (or doing) something that the rest of the group are doing

(or not) without disclosing their intent, reasons or any information about their

emotional state, or the extent of the deviation.

e) An excessive or prolonged activity in a person (sleeping, drinking, fasting,

dancing, spending money, meditating, etc.) with a reluctance or resistance to

stop, and often with a defensiveness or inability to explain why they are over-

indulging.

f) An experience of a sense of confusion or wariness when in contact with a

person that seems to be engendered by their behaviour and that this feeling is

also experienced by others on different occasions with that person.

g) The absence of any emotion, affect, or a sense of withdrawal from other people

or life, especially if the reason for this is not properly communicated.

5. LACK OF FIRM BOUNDARIES OR ADHERENCE TO AGREEMENTS:

Examples include:

a) A person increasingly breaking rules, boundaries, rhythms, constraints or

agreements. They may attempt to involve others in this, or may get

increasingly vehement, aggressive or defensive about their rights or

justifications.

b) Alternatively they might be very apologetic or continuously make promises

(never to do this again) that are just not kept.

c) An unwillingness or an inability to maintain or to form an agreement so that

there seems no hope of resolution unless someone (you) has to compromise

their (your) own position or make an exception for that person. (You need to

have a good level of objectivity for this category.)

d) A sense, when one is with the person, of them being scattered or uncontained

or unbounded or over-euphoric or hyper-manic, that is also experienced by

others on different occasions with that person.

6. UNUSUAL LEVELS OF NEED OR DEMAND:

Examples of this category can include:

a) Spending an inordinate amount of time with a person or giving them lots of

attention and getting no feeling of resolution with or satisfaction from them.

b) A person who makes out a special case for themselves in nearly every

circumstance. This is often accompanied by a heightened sense that it is they

or their need that matters and that no-one else's is really important. (Selfish)

c) A sense of being drained whenever one is in close contact with the person that

is also experienced by others on different occasions with that person.

d) A person is increasingly involved in a frenzied or continuous level of activity

over time without let-up and usually within a particular sphere or project, but

can also apply to work. This is sometimes called "manic".

e) A person who has been "window-shopping" through all the available therapies;

trying the "smorgasbord" approach (a little of everything) and yet never

seeming to stick with one thing or be properly satisfied. Their reasons for their

dissatisfaction may, or may not, be significant.

7. CONTINUOUS - EMOTIONAL CATHARSIS or WITHDRAWAL:

Behaviour in this category is really only significant when the first word

"Continuous" is applied.

a) Someone who breaks into an emotional state - old memories etc. - and starts

crying, abreacting, getting angry or depressed etc. and then cannot seem to

get out of this or stop that pattern. It is good that it is coming out. It is not so

good if they cannot stop and leave it.

b) It is fine for someone to be withdrawn - especially if they can say they feel a bit

withdrawn and perhaps give a clear, simple reason. It is possible indicative of

something else if they stay withdrawn.

c) Someone who is out of contact, may just be spacing out, withdrawn, wholly or

unable to express themselves clearly and, God knows, that sometimes

happens or is necessary and/or helpful. If they are staying out of contact, that

can indicate a problem.

8. LACK OF REAL CONTACT:

Examples of this category can include (also see below):

a) A person who is avoiding issues which are obvious to those around them, and

yet refuses to respond to their concerns or questions.

b) A sense that this person is not making proper contact on a day-to-day basis,

only going through the motions, and that there is not really anyone there

when talking about ‘real’ issues.

c) A regularity of a withdrawal situation so that there is a disassociation with any

degree of continuity.

d) Someone who continually shifts into somewhat disassociated topics, or who

talks about issues in a very disassociated way.

e) Someone who talks continually from one particular perspective (eg: work), or

on one particular level (eg: social) and never seems to be able to, or willing to,

talk about anything else or on any other level.

f) A person who is very self-absorbed and it seems as if you, the other, don’t

really exist for them, so there is no contact from them to you.

9. NEGLECT OF THE SELF:

Examples of this category can include:

a) A person not washing, sleeping, eating, being tidy, having clean clothes with

this behaviour becoming prolonged and seemingly on the increase.

b) An increasing withdrawal, often rationalised by the person as "I don't feel like

it", from their usual activities and very often accompanied by statements

indicating a lack of self-worth.

c) Excessive or prolonged activity in one confined area with a reluctance or a

resistance to stop, and that activity seems to be increasingly detrimental for

that person.

d) A sense of depression or sadness or neglect coming from that person that is

also experienced by others with that person on different occasions.

e) An increasing use of escapes like T.V., meditation, studying, leisure activities,

hobbies, or drugs like alcohol, tobacco or tranquillisers etc. where the usage

level is becoming seemingly detrimental and with either promises to reform

that do not materialise or a strong resistance towards admitting that there is

any problem.

f) Someone working too hard and getting increasingly irritable or explosive and

unable to stop or find a way out of their dilemma - the neglect comes in

putting the work before the person themselves. This is a classic burnout

syndrome.

N.B. The symptoms of burnout are: being exhausted all the time, not matter

how long you spend in bed; a sense of isolation from other people, to the

extent of becoming a recluse; low self-esteem; ineffectual, no matter how many

hours of work put in; a feeling of emotional deadness, or of being trapped;

chronic or sudden bursts of anger; loss of empathy for other people’s

problems; an increase in sarcasm, cynicism or general disparagement; loss of

sense of humour; loss of sex drive in a relationship, but an increase in casual

sex or other addictive behaviours; an increase in physical problems including

back and heart pain, headaches, frozen shoulder, chronic fatigue, adrenal or

thyroid problems, irritable bowel syndrome, post-viral illnesses, and other

illnesses, sometimes major like heart attacks brought on essentially by stress.

________________

It must be re-emphasized that you can probably classify everyone you know into

one of these categories at any one time or another. So they may only really be

significant as an indicator of a person in crisis under the following sets of

circumstances:

a) if you (and others) experience a person as being in more than just one

category,

or

b) that the category of behaviour they seem to be exhibiting is fairly

continuous and also escalating.

CAVEAT - Beware of significant cultural differences. What is appropriate in one

culture is often not appropriate in another, and visa versa. Many cultures have

certain rules of behaviour, and not abiding by these rules could be a significant

indicator for a member of that culture; whereas in another parallel culture, nothing

significant could be drawn from this. So, in a multi-cultural society, whose

standards are you judging them by?

LEVELS OF CRISIS

There are also different levels of crisis: so far I have mainly been referring to an

individual in crisis, but it is also important to recognise that the individual

(supposedly in crisis) has often been deeply affected by crises at other levels that

the individual is involved with.

A crisis can obviously happen within the couple relationship, or within the

family; or at work (in the team, department, company, sector); or in the social

environment (where there might be discrimination, degradation, isolation, or

victimization); or in other organizations in which the individual is involved (being

treasurer of a voluntary organisation with its funding suddenly cut); or in societies

and political systems (like Soviet communism), kingdoms or nations (like

Zimbabwe).

There are also crises in economic systems (as in the world financial crashes

of 1929-30 and 2008); and in weather and ecological systems (like desertification,

earthquakes, tsunamis, deforestation (in Brazil and in other rain forests), flooding

or global warming (and we may soon see many cities in crisis with rising sea levels);

or pollution (as with BP in the Gulf of Mexico).

There are crises in belief systems and religions (like the relative demise of

Christianity in 20th century, or in the wave of paedophilia and child abuse being

exposed in the Catholic church). We have also had numerous religious wars and

persecutions throughout the last 2,000 years (like the Cathars in France).

The industrial revolution (starting in the mid-19th century) created different

levels of crises with people streaming away from the countryside and into the cities

– with the result that there was a crisis in agriculture (with not enough people on

the land) and a crisis in the towns and cities with the number of incomers

outstripped the provision of housing and basic services (power, water, sewage,

transport, etc.). This is still happening in Shanghai and Beihai in China, Dubai in

Saudi Arabia, and in many other cities worldwide (like Sao Paulo in Brazil) with a

massive growth of slums surrounding the city and the attendant features of crime,

disease and social unrest.

The Western world went into a sort of crisis in the 1960s with the advent of

the contraceptive pill; freely available (though illegal) drugs; the post-war economy

booming; and the whole pop and hippy culture contradicting traditional values.

All these levels of crisis affect individuals deeply, both those within the direct

affect of these sociological crises but also those around them: there are

considerable ‘knock-on’ effects.

An economic crisis can create a sudden loss of jobs, with rising inflation,

increased taxes, decreasing property values, and the loss of capital, pension funds,

etc. There are increasing numbers of unemployed, poor, or homeless people, and a

growing gap between rich and poor. Richer countries give ‘aid’ to poorer countries

(often in the form of loans, which the poorer countries have difficulty repaying) but

the rich get richer and the poor continue to suffer.

There are other types or levels of crisis: wars, both as aggressors and as

victims, create massive levels of crisis, both socially and individually. Some of these

are territorial: some of these are ideological (as in the Korean War and the Vietnam

War): some of these wars are based on different belief systems: Christians v.

Muslims (Crusades); Catholics v. Protestants; Christian v. heathen (British Empire

in Africa, India etc.); Jewish v. Muslim (recently in Israel); Sunni v. Shia (in Iraq);

some of these are racial (as in Hutu v. Tutsi in Rwanda); and so forth.

We have seen many wars to do with territory throughout the ages, and some

to do with trade (e.g. Opium Wars); soon we may see wars in space, or wars about

water. There are also the armed polarizations between orthodox and other orthodox

(as in Northern Ireland) or, (hopefully less warlike) between orthodox and liberal (as

within the world-wide Anglican church over homosexuality).

These are all crises in systems: and all of these systemic crises deeply affect

individuals. Coping with a crisis cannot therefore focus totally on the individual

involved and their personal dynamics, but may also need to deal with it (or

minimally acknowledge the issues) on some of these different levels.

As therapists we might therefore even have to become partly ‘political’ –

supporting the individual (patient / client) against the system in crisis. The social

and political responsibilities of a psychotherapist could or should perhaps be

revised in the light of some of these issues:

• We are a significant part of the social and political system, and we cannot

avoid this responsibility

• We are amongst the professional specialists that really know about individual

suffering

• We are – perhaps more than most – professionals that are aware of the effects

of the sufferings and malfunctions of society and the prevailing cultural and

political systems

• We can use our professional positions and contacts to influence our social

and political systems, so that they can become more human

• As professionals in professional associations, we can make public

statements, or host debates, or make these issues into themes for

conferences and publish the results

• We have not done much of this to date; we need to change our professional

attitudes as well as our work with clients.

These different ‘levels’ of crisis – and of crisis working – should be taken into

account as we work with people in crisis.

Finally, please remember: the more sudden or violent is the crisis, the higher

is the risk of traumatization. The more abstract the crisis, the more powerless the

individual.

The material on these last 2 pages was gratefully adapted from a presentation by Peter Schulthess

at 17th EAP Congress, “Psychotherapy in Times of Crisis” Bucharest, Romania, July 2010.

MAKING CONTACT & STAYING IN CONTACT

In defining this concept, I am trying to give a feeling of how contact is often not

made, without reference to any particular situation, time, place or type of crisis.

Any of these ‘lack of contact’ states might also affect you: you may feel you are out

of contact with them, rather than they are out of contact with you, or those around

you. Types of situations in which there is a definite lack of contact may include:

A. The person is seeming very distant, or not really present, possibly with

their mind drifting, or possibly very spacey, or with a sense of fuzziness or

vagueness about them and what they are saying and you are not quite sure if there

is or isn't.

B. The person is being quite disjointed, or is not keeping to the point, or

telling long, complicated stories of doubtful significance, or continually changing

the subject, or playing with words (rhymes or puns), so that you only get little

glimpses of where they are and not a clear, coherent & comprehensive picture from

them.

C. The person is claiming to be someone else1, or to have special knowledge

about the way that someone else thinks; or to have direct and absolute contact

with some mystic being.

What makes this different from a healthy spiritual revelation (which

sometimes also happens) is that you are unable to manage to keep a sense of the

person in front of you as well as a sense of what the special knowledge, information

or channelling is all about. Being in receipt of this sort of information does not

mean that you disappear: sometimes it feels that you do.

D. The person may be very depressed and/or diminutive about themselves,

coming out with statements like "I don't really matter" or "It's not important how I

think", to the extent that you get the feeling that you are hardly with a person at

all, just a shell, or a blob, or something pretty amorphous. You may find yourself

encouraging them, or trying to talk them out of this state. This is also a form of

lack of contact.

E. The person is being very obsessive about a particular event, incident, or

topic and continually comes back to that particular subject whatever the situation

or topic is at present so that contact with them is very limited in terms of content.

F. The person that you are with is expressing emotions that are valid, given

the set of circumstances, but the level of emotion is considerably over the top (or

denied) and there is a seeming lack of contact with this exaggerated (or

underplayed) reaction. Their level of emotion is taken as "normal" in the

circumstances by them, and is obviously not normal.

G. The person is seemingly very coherent on a moment to moment basis, but

a few minutes later will either totally contradict themselves, or will have "forgotten"

that something was said or agreed so that there is no real continuity over time.

People in the early stages of Alzheimer’s have this as an increasingly chronic

condition. For people in crisis, it is slightly different and comes and goes more

1 This is unlikely to be in the form of someone thinking that they are Julius Caesar or Napoleon -

more likely that they are Jesus or a reincarnation of an Egyptian Priestess of Isis!

frequently.

H. There is contact with one aspect of the person’s personality, but there is

virtually no contact with another aspect, or any other aspect: and then it changes.

It is almost as if two people or two different personas, are inhabiting the same body

(which may actually be the case).. Sometimes the lack of contact is between these

two personas: i.e. you may be able to relate to both, but they are not relating to

each other. Confusing? = Lack of contact.

I. There is a lack of contact with “consensual reality” (mentioned earlier).

What they might be saying sounds wonderful, except that the world just doesn’t

work that way. They may have grandiose ideas that Nelson Mandela will be

interested in their ideas for a “peace plan” or something, and they have just faxed

him these ideas, and are now awaiting a response (viz: “and they have done it from

your machine and have to stay in your office till he replies”).

J. They have just now decided to… make a significant change in their life:

divorce their partner: leave their job: stop the medication they have been on: -

immediately, despite having no contact with their partner, or boss, or despite what

has been said by their doctor, who “doesn’t know anything”, or “who just doesn’t

understand” or whatever. And all this is on the basis of a Tarot reading, or because

they had a dream, or came to Findhorn for the weekend, or whatever. Out of touch!

K. They may have suddenly ceased all contact with a particular member of

their family, friends or workmates. However contact with this person may be

essential or necessary, at least for the moment, and some form of contact must be

restored (it could be for a parental, logistic, or financial reason).

Make sure you don’t get caught up as a go-between – because of their

particular form of crisis: advocate or negotiator is perhaps a better role, albeit

relatively skilled, and it demands a quid-pro-quo and being in contact with

consensual reality and degrees of reason and rationality.

L. The person is – for some reason – in a fairly chronic regression that makes

them more likely to be susceptible to groups that offer a “home”, a “new family”,

some form of “relief” or “salvation” etc. These groups can be genuine, or they can be

esoteric sects, cults (with charismatic leaders), or political, religious & ideological

movements, that may also be radical and possibly even terrorist. These groups

retain power over the members by isolating them from others, and thus there is

enforced lack of contact.

Once you have identified that the person is – really and truly – in a crisis, the

next section follows on directly:

WHAT TO DO AT FIRST

If you find yourself with a person in a situation such as described, and you do not

have any sort of therapeutic contract with them, and you do not have a lot of

experience in this field, then you MUST try to get in someone who can help

therapeutically. This is your first “appropriate action”. Please read the whole

section.

Getting the person in crisis to a point of a successful intervention.

A. You should or must inform:

(i) someone who is in direct contact with that person (i.e. a member of their

family, flatmate, etc.) and, if this is appropriate,

(ii) someone in their place of work or organisation. Ideally one of these people, or

you, will then get in contact with:

(iii) someone who has experience of working with people in crisis. (Also see the

“Resources” List)

As the person is possibly demanding some sort of a response by this type of

extraordinary behaviour, they will often continue in this type of behaviour (or

worse) until an appropriate response is made. The person’s extraordinary

behaviour may even exaggerate itself until an appropriate response is made.

An appropriate response can usually only be made by someone who is relatively

skilled at, or trained in, crisis intervention. Your task now, having identified

someone in crisis, is to find this person and get them involved. The rest of this

section centres around this point. So:-

B. The sooner an appropriate response can be made, the easier and better the

resolution will be for all people concerned.

This particularly applies if there has been any disclosure about previous mental

illness, breakdowns, psychoses, psychiatric treatment, or if the person has been

prescribed any of the psychiatric drugs. (see Appendix)

Sometimes people try to deny that a crisis is really happening. They are trying to

hold it off. A slight escalation of their situation may bring on the crisis, but the

person's character pattern or whatever is determined not to admit this. This aspect

may have to be confronted, and as soon as this is done, they will then be able to

‘have their crisis’. Though this may also mean that they might also try to run away

from it, or you, as you have confronted them.

An appropriate response is for the person in crisis to be ‘met’ by a person with

some experience or skill in these matters. This could be almost anyone, and it is

quite dependent on the type of crisis.

Sometimes the person in crisis cannot help himself or herself easily, it is therefore

up to the people around them to get them the appropriate help. Getting help is

essential. Getting the right help is desirable. Don’t delay too long trying to get the

exact ‘right’ person.

*** Now, please check out the note at the bottom of this section to see if you are the

appropriate person to continue, and, if you are, then continue: otherwise, stop

here, now! Wait with them till the appropriate person arrives.

C. Confront them gently, especially if you have any position of authority or

responsibility, or if you have any special relationship with them, and try to

get some more detailed information - then check this information out.

Good accurate information is really vital at this point. It may help determine who

makes the successful intervention, how, when, and where.

• Is it going to be a psychiatrist; a social worker; a psychotherapist; a priest; a

counsellor; someone from the SEN Network, or what?

• Is it better for them to stay where they are, or at their home, or in another

special place (yet to be identified)?

• What resources have they got? – money, credit cards, available shelter,

belongings, tickets, support, friends, family, etc.

It may be necessary to ask specifically about some of the points mentioned above,

and about the history of their crisis, especially if any suspicions have been aroused

that it might actually be an emergency situation, rather than a crisis. Hints about

aspects of their history, medication, damage, etc, are often dropped gently, or

picked up from other sources. Disclosures are often made subtly - but not

necessarily to you! Ask the person, and then ask others, to see if the stories tally

and complement each other, or are contradictive.

D. Find out more information from those people around the person in crisis,

and from the person themselves, and try to build up a bigger picture.

Ask their flat-mates, partners & others in their work group/department or

whatever event or programme they are on. It is always worth trying to pick up bits

of information in odd moments.

You sometimes do need to meet and sit with the person in crisis – they need to be

present, and see you are working for them; you should not do of this all from

another office. The person who is in crisis is often quite desperate to talk about

himself or herself. Anything they say (because of their exaggerated emotional state)

is probably very relevant, but it may not be complete, or it may be distorted a bit. It

helps to build trust if you listen properly. When chatting, the person often relaxes

and is less guarded and when being "interrogated" their defenses are up and

stronger.

E. Now make the call!

At some point shortly after you have got as much of the necessary information as

you can get within a reasonable time frame, it is then the time to make the call, or

calls. You are trying to get specialist help for this person. You are not a specialist;

you do not have the available resources. They’re out there somewhere. It is now

your job to try to find them and get the person in crisis the appropriate assessment

or referral. At this point you may need someone else to sit with the person in crisis,

as it is quite difficult to speak about someone to someone else in front of them. You

may need to make several calls. Be as factual and succinct as possible, Take notes

of whom you call, their number, and what they say. Always ask the person you are

speaking to on the phone if they have any other ideas about referrals to who could

be a suitable person for a crisis intervention. Try to establish an idea of times,

availability, contracts, payments, etc. Don’t be in a position where you have to wait

to long; get someone here now, as soon as is reasonably possible. It is a crisis! You

are also just making a call about someone who is in crisis. You are not becoming

responsible for saving their life; or their soul. You should not commit yourself to

anything that you are not prepared to do or unable to do with this third party. They

(the people you are calling) are some sort of relevant professionals. They carry a

certain degree of authority, responsibility and hopefully also a degree of

“respondability”. Check their referral criteria: does the person in crisis fit?

F. Report back.

Tell the person in crisis what is happening: what you have done: what you think

might happen now. That means you are being as honest as possible with them. You

don’t have to justify anything, but expressions like: “I think that you are having a

crisis and that means that we should get in some specialized help: so I have called

So-&-so.“ This may be sufficient. The person may have a reaction: that’s OK. You

have made a decision that, given the circumstances, you think is the correct

decision: and that’s OK as well. These are differences of opinion and will get sorted

out eventually.

Tell the other people involved on a “need-to-know” basis: who and how much. Some

people just need to know you have called someone and that someone is coming to

help. Others may need more detailed or specific information. Do not necessarily feel

bound by any confidentiality. You are not a professional. This does not apply to

you. You need to get the person professional help. They need to be informed about

the full situation – all the details.

G. Then stay in contact.

The person in crisis will sometimes move in and out of contact with you, and in

and out of contact with consensual reality. This is quite normal for someone in a

crisis. Gently plot this movement. Notice when it happens and what triggers any

changes. Just try to make sure that you are in contact with them, and stay in

contact with them, even if they are not totally in contact with you.

Read the section about “Staying in Contact”.

Make sure, if you have to leave and someone else takes over, that they have all the

relevant information. This is part of you “staying in contact”. Write down all

important information, before you leave.

H. Create as much of a relaxed situation as possible. Defuse any panic.

Get rid of the kids and any other anxious people around. Just chat. Get someone

else to make a cup of tea for everyone. Act pretty normally. There is nothing to do

now except to wait.

Remember it is often YOUR fear or anxiety that can escalate a situation. The

person in crisis will (inevitably) sense it and may also re-act to it. So just wait for

whom-so-ever you have called to arrive, or for the time of the appointment, and

until then, make sure that the person in crisis doesn’t go off alone somewhere by

himself or herself. Always go with them; you can wait just as well walking along the

streets, or sitting in the park. Take a mobile phone with you so that you are still in

contact and contactable.

I. It is nearly always worthwhile making some case notes.

FIRSTLY this helps you keep things reasonably clear. SECONDLY you may not

overlook or forget things if you keep such notes. THIRDLY you may have to make a

summary to someone else and these notes could help you do this. FOURTHLY you

may have a degree of responsibility or accountability, either for others or in respect

of this person, and the notes can help you should how you exercised that

responsibility. FIFTHLY you may have to write up the situation. SIXTHLY it helps

you review the situation, by yourself or with others, especially if you make a

mistake you want to learn from. SEVENTHLY, as mentioned, you may have to leave

and ‘hand over’ to someone else. Make the notes.

________________________

*** NOTE: From point C. onwards, you should be fairly committed to and available

for the first stage of this unfolding process:

Getting the person in crisis to a point of a successful intervention.

If you aren’t committed, or you can’t so commit yourself to continuing with the

person in crisis, then get someone else in who can. You may be just about to go on

holiday, or you have kids that need to be picked up from school, or you need to

lead a workshop now, or have to get a contract signed, or whatever. So get in

someone else, anyone else, and then go and do what you have to do. Tell them

what has happened, give them this handbook (if this feels appropriate), and ensure

that you “hand over” properly.

You can ask the person in crisis who they would to come like in, to be with, or to

make these arrangements with, for a while: you may be pleasantly surprised. They

often have resources that you are unaware of. They may already have a therapist or

counsellor, or they may have an affinity with someone else.

Tell them why you have to leave and that you will/may be able to come back later.

You may be freer then, and have more space and time, and can come back in and

help out later without any conflict. The person in crisis should be able to

understand this. Be clear about your parameters, and do not promise to do

anything that you cannot commit to happily.

There are also different roles to take in a Crisis Group (see later) and you may well

fit into one of these roles: a role that is more appropriate for yourself.

Consider thanking the person for the privileged of becoming involved (so far) in

their process.

USE OF PSYCHOTHERAPY

The Basic Steps & Goals To Resolve A Crisis

The aim of this booklet (and of a Crisis Group) is to attempt to help you to provide

an appropriate set of responses as quickly as possible to someone in a

psychological, emotional, or spiritual, crisis. It must then be the ultimate aim to

assist that person to regain their normal functioning to a level as good as or better

than their pre-crisis level as soon as is reasonably possible.

However, this must not necessarily be taken to be understood as restoring

the situation back to what it was before: as this could be to deny the value of a

crisis, or not to follow the process of a crisis.

There may also be a psychological component that can really only be worked

with by somebody with some training in psychotherapy. This does not necessarily

mean a psychiatrist or psychologist. The ‘medical’ or ‘treatment’ model that is often

part of their training can sometimes make these professions unsuitable to work

with a crisis in a ‘process-oriented’ way.

There are several basic steps to resolve a crisis: so far, we have been looking

at various aspects of the first three points:

1. Gain the rapport & trust of the person in crisis & of the people around:

2. Formulate a clear definition of problem.

3. Clarify your own involvement.

There are several other steps to follow.

4. Establish what has already been tried: by the person; by others (friends

/ family); by the medical profession; by other therapists, skilled

helpers, etc.?

5. Focus on different perceptions of reality - how do they differ?

6. What is the person’s own perception or dynamic?

7. What are possible goals for treatment, or jointly achievable aims.

A crisis also has three distinct phases:

A. The ‘preparation’ or escalation phase

B. The ‘critical’ phase

C. The ‘post-crisis’ or de-escalation phase.

Different Phases

A. Psychotherapy can be very useful in a number of different ways with the

prevention of any further escalation, especially in the first phase. These ways

can be:

• Degrees of support, mediation and process skills for any possible conflict

resolution to try to prevent further problems

• Awareness of growing tension and thus suitable responses made, or

appropriate action taken earlier, again to aid prevention of the crisis

• Training and awareness for the client / patient and other possible supporters

• Empowerment and self-help techniques used more conscientiously to

increase potential and use of resources

• Support of self-responsibility and ego-functions.

B. Psychotherapy can also be very useful, as has been and will be described, in

the full crisis phase:

• Calming the person in crisis down

• Establishing a constructive therapeutic relationship

• Helping them connect with their body (grounding)

• Collecting information: what has happened; what are the available

resources?

• Organising a crisis group (see later) to ‘hold’ the person’s process

• Exploring issues within the process; occasionally challenging or confronting

inappropriate behaviour

• Examining and discussing what has been irrevocably broken or damaged and

what might be repaired or resorted to and what is still functioning

• Examining what resources the individual has to overcome or cope with the

crisis

• Ensuring that all basic needs are satisfied and managed on a day-to-day

basis (more the work of the ‘Carers’ – see Forming a Crisis Group)

C. Psychotherapy can furthermore be vey appropriate after the crisis has

‘peaked’ in the post-crisis or ‘de-escalation’ stage:

• A continuation of the support (and rapport) in working through the crisis

process

• Helping to morn the loss of aspects, status or items from previous to the

crisis

• Expressing emotions connected with the crisis in the safe space of the

therapy room

• Experimenting with new possibilities, attitudes, perceptions and behaviour

• Looking forward, with new orientations

• And very importantly – helping with the integration of the crisis at lots of

different levels

• Finally, to encourage the person’s abilities to experiment with these changes

and assimilate these, in order to find creative adjustments to their new life

circumstances.

There is an oft-quoted maxim possibly relevant here:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the

courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the

difference.” Reinhold Niebuhr, American theologian, 1892-1971

The material on these last 2 pages was gratefully adapted from a presentation by Peter Schulthess

at 17th EAP Congress, “Psychotherapy in Times of Crisis” Bucharest, Romania, July 2010.

APPROPRIATE ACTIONS

So, as we have mentioned, if someone has been identified as being a person in such

a state, contact should be made with somebody who has definite experience of

crisis work (ideally a psychotherapist or similar), and who can come and help

assess the situation, quickly and discretely. This is essential.

If there is no way of a professional being able to get to the person in crisis

easily, another or an additional course of appropriate action is to help the person in

crisis to set up a crisis group around them: to create (or re-create) a sort of

community around that person in crisis. Sometimes, someone who is aware of the

parameters of a crisis group can offer this sort of organisational help very

successfully over the phone. The parameters of a Crisis Group are dealt with below

(page 31). This sort of ‘holding situation’ may be what is appropriate in such cases,

or it may be that it is decided that it is appropriate to form a crisis group.

Much of what is called “appropriate action” here revolves around having a

much more ‘useful’ or supportive perspective of the person who is in crisis and

what it is all about for them. This is what is “appropriate” to them; and they are the

ones having the crisis.

If you see the person as dysfunctional, this will not help them – or you. If you

can identify with those times when you might have been in crisis yourself, and then

try to empathize with their position, you may be of more use. You will only really be

able to help them from a position where you are supporting their “process”, rather

than telling them they are “wrong” and what they “should” be doing is what is

“right”. This is very much more of a developmental “process-oriented” type of work,

rather than a black-white, right-wrong, polarized situation. So, how can we help

you move to a slightly better state?

This is not to say that, at relevant points, you cannot help them cognitively

understand their situation better, if that is what they indicate is needed: nor is this

contradictory in assisting them to work step-by-step towards a better way of doing

things, if that is what they decide that they would like to, or need to do. There may

also be systems of thought or well-defined perspectives, that it might be

appropriate for them to consider whether they fit into these categories or not.

Occasionally it is helpful for people to identify themselves into a category like

“alcoholic”, or “co-dependent”, or “addictive”, or “abused”, or “psychic”, or whatever.

Rarely is it appropriate for you to do so.

I have already suggested how psychotherapy can effectively address some of

the issue in the preparation phase: now I would like to start to look at what is

generally considered as some more “appropriate actions”, prior to deciding whether

to form a crisis group and what that might look like.

OTHER WAYS OF WORKING WITH A CRISIS

Often these crisis states can also be a cry for help. One of the better responses

is to react as soon as possible to the basic need, rather than to the symptoms of

the crisis (which may actually be self-defeating). It may be that someone can help

with the identification of this basic need through their experience or training, so

please use the talents that exist around. To establish some of these basic needs

with the person in crisis, some counselling or psychotherapy is probably an

essential prerequisite

Teamwork is paramount in any form of crisis intervention. It may be that the

most appropriate response will be to continue your contact with the person, but

(and this is absolutely essential) only with proper back-up and support from

several others. It is highly unlikely that you, or any other single person, can provide

the person in crisis with everything that they need to regain their functioning, or to

get out of, or through their particular crisis.

Alternatively they may possibly some help need to get out of their present

situation (with you?) into a more appropriate situation (for them) and the crisis

symptoms are a cry for help and a (sort of) method of achieving that end. Either

way, teamwork is very important, and if you are a part of their crisis, or represent a

part of their crisis, you (and they) will need some outside help to sort it all out.

A crisis situation can sometimes run for 36-72 hours non-stop. How long can

you stay awake? How useful are you three-quarters of the way through that

period. We therefore recommend the structure of the “Crisis Group” (page 25).

There are also some organic conditions, such as certain mineral deficiencies,

withdrawal from certain drugs, or certain types of epilepsy, that can imitate

psychiatric symptoms or those of extreme emotional distress. As it may be

important to distinguish these organic and medical situations from true

psychological, emotional or spiritual crisis symptoms, some level of medical or

psychiatric assessment sometimes has a very important role to play in helping to

identify what is the most appropriate response. A person skilled in crisis work will

usually know when to call upon medical diagnostic skills and at what point -

whether or not medical treatment is eventually used. Please suspend any (possible)

biases of your own against the medical or psychiatric profession: they contain

many kind, very knowledgeable, and dedicated people. They also have access to

many resources, and a medical cabinet is just one of these.

Contact someone. Whenever the question arises around a person in crisis, "Shall

we contact a psychiatrist, psychotherapist, a member of the Spiritual Emergence

Network, or whatever?", always, always, always try to veer towards doing so. The

thought itself usually means that either a crisis is precipitating and that you are

beginning to recognise it, or the thought can be a part of your deep wisdom and

intuition working to solve the problem which your cognitive mind is having a

difficulty with. The contact you are seeking might be to get supervision, support,

and advice for what you (and the others with you) are doing reasonably adequately

at the moment.

Situations like these often get worse before they get better. A timely

intervention and appropriate action can often really help the person and even

defuse the crisis, as the message to the person is that they are being taken

seriously and thus do not have to develop a full crisis to get the attention or aid

needed. Alternatively, to delay can mean that the situation gets a lot worse and the

“appropriate action” then is often much more costly or traumatic (emotionally,

time-wise and financially). Sometimes, the appropriate action is to do nothing: but

this must be determined specifically, and most other possibilities eliminated first.

As a rule of thumb, always inform the person what is happening; why you have

decided to take this action and what is going to happen next - even though they

might not like it. There is no reason to treat them as anything less of a person just

because they are in crisis. Crisis can often include a level of paranoia which is not

helped by whispered conversations and strange people suddenly appearing and

asking a lot of questions. If needed, refer to "authority/ regulations/ procedures

etc." as a justification for calling someone else in, even though there may be some

resistance to this - even thought there may be some resistance to this. It also gives

them an opportunity to say "No" and suggest an alternative that seems appropriate

to you (and others) as well.

Always have someone stay with the person. It is not good, for them or generally,

to leave someone who is in or near a crisis alone, even for a moment. If possible,

always have someone else present and in attendance as well (or on immediate call)

at all times. A person in crisis can do sudden and weird things without any

previous warning. Unfortunately, one usually only learns this by experience.

Bathroom doors should stay ajar: privacy, but also accessibility: there are many

things in a bathroom that a person in crisis can use to abuse. Anyway, I hope I

have made the point!

Be clear and direct. It might be necessary to be quite firm and matter-of-fact at

times and to tell the people around you just how it is. "This is what is happening;

this is what has happened and it is important that you (the person) stay here until

such & such else happens. There seems to be a crisis and I have taken charge for the

moment. I have also called [the police/ambulance/for a psychotherapist/or whatever].

I may be wrong, but it's probably best to be on the safe side, and anyway it's my

job/or the clinic’s policy to do this ... etc."

Try to Work with the Person’s Process. Try to speak to them in their language,

and in their terms. Try to ensure that you are genuinely on their side and working

for their benefit. If there are conflicts of interest, then maybe you can take a

different ‘role’ and still support them in some way, whilst being also true to your

other interests. “Working with the person’s process” is not a license for them to do

anything they want and you all to run around trying to support and facilitate them;

it is a deep and sincere attempt to help them expiate themselves out of their crisis

situation, which may be a significant and meaningful point in their lives if given

this respect and opportunity. It is respect for the person; the factors that brought

them there; the environment they are in (and the people around them; and for your

own part in their process. For more fundamental components of working with

people’s processes, please consult the reading list: Arnold Mindell’s work is

particularly good in this respect.

Crisis states in others can, will and do affect you emotionally too: This effect is

also one of the indicators of a crisis. You are (hopefully) monitoring your own

emotional reactions all the time. However, when you are eventually clear of the

situation, take some time to "get clear" yourself; a shower will help; or talking it

over with a friend & crying on their shoulder; getting angry or whatever you need to

do. You must look after yourself. No-one else will do that for you. Do this before

you go and do anything else significant.

Use cleansing techniques liberally: Light a candle. Use incense. Have a long

shower. Plants are good and help absorb energy; do a bit of gardening. Walk on the

beach or by the river, if you can. Sunlight, wind and rain are really good cleansing

agents. Watch a bad or funny movie. Get a support person for yourself. You can

also cleanse yourself by catharting a bit: shout or scream, bash cushions, laugh,

cry. And/or you can also cleanse yourself by whatever form of meditation you find

appropriate for yourself.

Get as full a history as possible: At some point – though this is not a major

priority – it is important to get a s full a history of the person’s crisis and their

background as possible. You do not have to do this: sometimes the carers or

support people can do this. Have it recorded flexibly and so that others can add to

it. It can also be therapeutic: to have someone recount back to you (the person in

crisis) the narrative of your crisis, especially if there have been altered states or

even periods of dissociation, can really help understanding, and the ‘owning’ of

your (the person’s) process.

FORMING A CRISIS GROUP

Components of a Crisis Group:

There are four main components or roles within a crisis group and these are

usually mutually exclusive in that these roles just do not mix. This is a very

important "caveat" - something to 'beware' or be aware of: stay in one role only.

The Companion(s) or Carer(s) - a person in crisis needs extra help and support -

at differing levels according to their need - sometimes 24 hours a day -

sometimes for a half-hour chat, twice a day. The people in this role are not

(necessarily) therapists - the role is more to be a companion or friend. They

need to come from the heart, purely and simply. A lot of helpful therapeutic

work can be done - but only from the positive reinforcement side. This can be

an unskilled role – though a very loving and caring one.

The Facilitator or Therapist - this role can also be positive but at times the

person in this role may need to challenge the person in crisis's attitude or

process. It is difficult or even impossible in extreme cases both to support and

challenge. It is much easier to separate the roles. The facilitator has an

overview of the person's process and may also help direct the crisis group.

There is a fair degree of training and experience implied here to fulfil this role.

Hopefully there is also a reasonably democratic process as well. It is the

person's process after all. Other people have to agree whole-heartedly as they

may be doing the work.

Both these first two roles are centred around the dynamic of the person in

crisis. The people should stay centred with that person and limit all contact to

anyone else with the family etc as far as is humanly possible. This role is

taken by:

The Gatekeeper or Guardian - whose job it is to protect the person's process and

see that it can happen undisturbed. A safe space is thus created. This role can

be an administrator (of a clinic) who will also negotiate finances and

placements. It can also be the person who organises rotas etc. Information to

the outside is channelled in and out through this person. This is a hard role.

The Process Supporter(s) - are the people who back up the process, who support

the supporters, give supervision to the therapist, who work with the rest of the

family to create a different and better environment for the person in crisis to

emerge into. This work with doctors (perhaps), family & friends is most

important as this group can and should take over from the crisis group, if they

are not involved as such already. The “supporting the supporters” aspect is

also very important as the carers (particularly) can get very drained.

We have also found it very useful to keep a journal/diary/log book of the crisis

process with everyone (crisis person as well as helpers) writing in anything:

dreams, events, impressions, feelings, times, freak-outs, medication etc. This is

really useful for the person afterwards to help integrate their crisis and get the full

picture of what happened.

Acknowledgements to Joseph Berke: Arbours Association

FORMING A COMMUNITY AROUND A PERSON IN CRISIS

It is also sometimes impossible to work with a person as a therapist alone. The

person needs or declares their need for a wider ‘community’ in which to have their

crisis. An example might be of a person still living at home who has an emotional

breakdown. In this instance, probably staying at home – the environment that they

had their crisis in, might not be the best solution; they may need some time and

space away from the home in order to discover what their next steps are: yet it

needs to be a relatively safe space. One client I worked with by telephone

consultation in this situation ‘remembered’ that a cousin, living in a nearby town

had a spare room in their flat. I encouraged them to follow up this idea, and also

suggested that they explain to the cousin some of the things we had talked about,

so there would be a context to their situation and a support for that person in

crisis. I also encouraged them to take this opportunity to follow up another idea

they had had: of taking up art classes; an idea that their parents had disapproved

of. I felt the extra support that they might gain in this situation, and the new

people they would meet, and the widening of their boundaries, and the ‘fresh start’,

and the personal interest, all justified supporting their suggestion. In effect I was

encouraging them to create a ‘community’ around themselves in their crisis

situation: a more supportive community than their home environment.

In another instance, a member of our extended (Findhorn) community came into

crisis when s/he was living on the West Coast of Scotland. In this instance, s/he

felt that s/he needed much more support and a much closer “family” feeling in

order to get through their crisis: this was again working with them initially over the

phone. So we agreed that this person should come over to the main community,

and, since, in this instance, they were very shaky and almost borderline, I actually

drove across Scotland to meet them off the ferry and brought them back to the

community where we ‘commandeered’ an empty bungalow and set up a daily

support rota with those people who s/he had nominated, and who had agreed to

help. For three weeks we all worked with this person as s/he went deep into their

crisis; the darkest fears and the blackest moments. We all wrote down, in a sort of

logbook, what we had done, and what we had perceived and felt whilst we were

with this person: whatever the role: carer, therapist, supporter, friend, etc. This log

turned into a record of this person’s crisis that was very useful to them later on in

their integrative process. No-one got over-loaded; no-one got stressed out; and yet

there was a continuity and a level of support that allowed a depth of working that I

have experienced rarely in my 20 or so years of work as a psychotherapist. At one

point in this particular person’s therapy work, s/he mentioned that s/he was

worried that s/he couldn’t make enough noise, even though the bungalow was

relatively private, as s/he felt there were still people around who might be

disturbed, so we went into the sound-proofed recording studio and there s/he

explored the noises that s/he wanted to make. The finding of her ‘voice’ also

allowed him/herself to regress to the point at which their deeper self could emerge

and start to be recognised more fully. This was a break-though point for his/her

crisis.

There are other ways in which one can consider creating a community around a

person in crisis. Sometime the support and personnel are there, but the

understanding isn’t. So the task here might be to educate the people around them

in the concepts of crisis work and process work and to encourage them to adopt

some of these roles, and constraints. This coming-together for a common purpose

with an educative input has often been sufficient to create a sort of community

around the person in crisis, for them to feel that the contact and support they

receive is helpful and constructive; and with that, and the emphasis on self-

directed strategies and process, they have been able to have their crisis

successfully.

I emphasise, again and again, that when working with a person in crisis, it is really

important to really listen to their story, and what lies behind their story. If they

report, or it is reported that, they spent three hours with person A in (say) the

kitchen or the pottery: firstly, “Hey, That’s great! You must have really enjoyed being

with them.” And secondly ask “What did you get from being with them?” What is

the aspect of their process that took them there and kept them there? This is often

the significant material.

In a community setting it may also be possible to find out from person A

what their experience was of the person in crisis for that three-hour period

(Guardian Role). This can be very helpful if part of ‘creating their community’ can

in future include person A in some role or other. It may be necessary to encourage

the person in crisis (Therapist’s Role) to discover from person A whether they can

go again; or discourage them from going again to person A, if it transpires that the

Guardian’s report is negative.

Maybe it is possible to get the ‘something’ that they got from person A, from

another person B in future; or in some other appropriate way; and so we come

back continually into the therapeutic exploration of the person’s process; what the

person needs and how they might achieve it.

Sometimes, though fairly rarely, the person in crisis has not been able to cope with

the ‘expansion’, or break-through components that they have come to in their

crisis; instead, they have wanted to back-off from the crisis and restore the

elements that existed previously. Whilst one can never completely turn the clock

back, the therapist’s role here would be (still) to support their process, and thus

help them to restore relationships that have been broken, either prior to or possibly

contributive to the crisis, or which have been broken or disrupted by the

extremities of the crisis. Working with others – as well as the person in crisis - is

sometimes needed. (See “Forming a Crisis Group”)

Finally, as I was reminded in a seminar I gave on this topic, sometimes the

sanctuary of the therapeutic, one-on-one, intimate, dispassionate, and confidential

space that can exist in the therapy room, is what is really necessary to help the

person through their crisis. This point is picked-up again in the ‘Zen Space’ section

that follows later. But it helps proves the point that one strategy doesn’t fit all, and

sometimes just ‘being’ with a person is what is needed: you don’t have to ‘do’

anything.

SOME BASIC STRATEGIES

There are various basic strategies sometimes useful for defusing emergencies

and helping someone in a crisis:

1. Try to incorporate the person's world-view into any design. Their

language, fears, values, perceptions of themselves and others make up their world.

If you can communicate with them in these terms - or in their native language - it

can really help. A crisis often increases a person's rigidity of viewpoint and their

alienation from others – a form of bridge helps.

2. Try to re-frame. If you can help them adjust their perceptions into

something slightly closer to mainstream reality, then they can get more in contact

with you, others and themselves. This should not distort their own perceptions.

3. Accept their defensiveness & incorporate their resistance into any

intervention. You are intervening, in some way, in their process. They can get

defensive. Avoid the headlong collision. Try to keep yourself (seemingly at least) on

their side, not against them. Go with their resistance, but in your direction.

4. The "illusion of alternatives" - is where you offer a seeming choice, but

both involve change. "Do you want to go to the hospital in my car or in an

ambulance?" is a little gross, but sometimes the situation gets to this point.

5. Negotiate change. See if you can offer a "quid pro quo" or get some

concessions from both sides. Their strategies are not working. Yours might, but

they don't know that. Make them an offer that seems attractive, “Let’s try this”

rather than an ultimatum, "You do this or we'll do that".

6. Delay the final decision. Anything that is final seems like the end ... of

something. People are very scared of endings - death, parting, separation,

abandonment, giving-up. Don’t force one – unless you have to: delay it, if possible.

Their process will continue anyway.

7. Focus on their process. It is imperative for a successful outcome that the

person involved in the crisis is able to see their part in their own process. By

focussing on their overall or deeper process, the intermediate ups-&-downs or the

symptoms can be overcome more easily.

8. If it works, use it - as long as this doesn't mean lying or abuse. Tactics like:

Distracting with trivia if an escalation is being threatened; Appearing confused -

playing on a person's desire to be understood; Re-framing crisis behaviour in a

more positive light, which can help remove some fear & shame; Limited medication;

Giving them the control (but not perhaps the choice); Paradoxical interventions;

‘Stealing’ the person's process - instead of them smashing up a chair, you do it, as

it’s safer – or substitute a cup for a chair, as it’s cheaper; Cautious use of humour;

etc. are all reasonably pragmatic strategies that can be used - with caution, if they

seem to have a chance of success.

9. Alternative strategies may be better - not only for them. They have inner

wisdom - access it! Listen to your own intuition. Check it out, if possible. What has

not been addressed yet, and why? What is ‘left field’? Could this be better?

A “ZEN” SPACE

Sometimes, or often, it is necessary to allow the person to be in a “Zen” space. They

may want it, or need it, or ask for it – in some way. And it is absolutely O.K. if they

do. And there are just the normal safeguards that need to be taken to ensure that

they are not going to be abusing the space, or abusing themselves within this

space. By a “Zen” space, we are meaning the voluntary, unique and especially

designed equivalent of a sanctuary, a retreat space, or a padded cell, or something

in between. A “Zen” space is a quiet, safe space where the person in crisis can go to

just “be”.

When someone is going through deep and powerful traumatic change, there are a

number of factors that need to be considered from the perspective of what this

person is experiencing. Consider the caterpillar metamorphosing into a butterfly.

They absolutely need the cocoon in order to do this. This is not just an

unnecessary invention; nature doesn’t work that way. Similarly as John, or Mary,

is transforming into their new, more spiritual, potential, they may well need

something of a safe space, a cocoon, in which to do this.

If there have been quite traumatic experiences: Kundalini, Life-Death-Rebirth, etc.,

(see Section 2) then a fair amount of time is needed to just experience the effects of

“being changed” by this process. What is it like to be in this new body? What effect

have all these changes had on me? Who am I now? What do I do next?

A “Zen” space should be comfortable and quiet. There should be a clear rule about

entry, or non-entry, for other persons. No-one should be able to come in at their

own volition, or without specific permission, except in certain emergency

conditions. Maybe there should be set times of the day when the “Zen” space is

dissolved and freer entry, exit, and communication is resumed. These things must

be carefully negotiated, built-up or “tweaked” until they are right. Just knowing

that such a space exists can aid the person in crisis to get through some of the

other ‘bad’ times.

Contact with nature can be excellent: a shack in the woods. The ability to paint,

draw and write can be important, so these facilities can be provided. Some people

like having their own music: others like the enforced silence without any

distractions available. TVs and radios are probably not a good idea. Books can be

good (see Reading List). Simple food and drink should be provided by the carers at

regular (agreed) intervals, maybe by being left in an agreed spot, with an

understanding that if it is not consumed after x hours, that constitutes a warning

signal for the carers.

The ability to get up in the night and paint, draw, or write or whatever without

disturbing anyone else, and then to sleep, almost endlessly, and all at one’s own

rhythm, is often prized by “Zen” space users. It is very healing. One-on-one

therapeutic contact with someone who is totally uninvolved and absolutely neutral,

in a room that has no other connections, can also be a form of “zen space.”

MEDITATION & MINDFULNESS

A quiet physical space is not the only thing that is needed: a quiet mind is

sometimes essential. The regular practice of meditation has many different

advantages. Meditation is a very powerful form of relaxation. Meditation does not

have to be religious, or based on any particular faith. Essentially, it is sitting still,

breathing regularly, and quietening your mind. When you do this, your body slows

down and you shift more into the parasympathetic part of the Autonomic Nervous

System (that’s a good thing). Eventually your mind will slow down as well and you

will become more peaceful and relaxed. This is extremely good for many medical

conditions, like hypertension (high blood pressure), and also many psychological

ones. We often need to reduce the stress caused by everyday living and then the

extra stress caused by extraordinary events.

Meditation Position: Make sure that you are not going to be disturbed; switch iff

the ringer on the phone; turn off the mobile; hang a note on the bedroom door; tell

the others in the house that you are going to meditate for (say) 20 minutes (they

will get used to the idea soon). Settle in a comfortable sitting position, either on a

straight-backed chair, with your feet flat on the floor, or on a soft surface on the

floor, sitting cross-legged. Your spine should be vertical; your body relaxed; your

weight supported and balanced.

Check your Body and Breathing: Bring your awareness to how your body is

feeling. Spend a minute or two checking yourself out, doing a body scan. Become

aware of how your body feels; warm or cold; comfortable or uncomfortable; the feel

of your clothes against your skin; whether your belt or neck feels constrained; the

feel of any jewellery or watches on your body. Make any adjustments necessary to

be comfortable.

Then become aware of your breathing; is it shallow or light; is it only in the chest or

belly; are you holding your breath at all, or is it flowing in and out fairly freely.

Become aware of which parts of your body move when you breathe. Maybe there is

a slight pause at the top of the in-breath or the bottom of the out-breath. Maybe

you are breathing in and out only through your nose, or only through your mouth.

Don’t try to control your breathing, just allow the breath to flow in and out. Simply

let the breath breathe itself. This is very peaceful. You do not have to do anything

else, just keep on doing this.

Either Empty your Mind or Focus your Mind: Sooner or later your mind will

start to wander, or thoughts will come into your mind to distract your awareness

and your ‘peace of mind’. This is very common, especially in the early ‘learning’

stages. It is not a mistake or failure: it is just what the mind does. Congratulations

for noticing that your attention is not on your breath. Just empty your mind of all

thoughts, and/or focus your mind back on your breathing. This will happen over

and over again. Just keep on emptying your mind of thoughts and re-focussing

your awareness on your breathing.

Sometimes you might wish to focus or meditate on a particular topic, like ‘world

peace’ or ‘healing’. As you breathe in, focus on these qualities within you; as you

breathe out, send out these qualities into the world. Again, your attention may

wander at times, or thoughts may cascade through your mind. This is normal: just

refocus your attention and awareness. Make each moment count. Keep coming

back to the topic or focus of the meditations

All thoughts have equal value: there are no ‘good’ thoughts or ‘bad’ thoughts.

Thinking is not ‘bad’ and an empty mind ‘good’. Don’t get distracted by content and

don’t get into judgement: do not try to eliminate or suppress certain types of

thoughts or topics or feelings. What matters most is the awareness – of your

thoughts and when you are thinking; and try to balance this with an empty mind

and a sense of peace, as much as you can. If you hang onto thoughts, or find

yourself judging them (or you), just let it all go and re-focus on your breathing, or

on the topic again.

Continue like this for about 15 - 20 minutes (or longer, if you wish). 15 – 20

minutes is the minimum time to get the maximum benefit. Try doing this once or

twice a day – regularly, every day. The effect is cumulative, so you may not notice a

huge difference after the first few times. The effect is usually quite subtle and – over

time – can also be quite powerful. After a while, you may notice when you miss out

on doing it. Just find a few moments and do it again.

Practice, practice and more practice: You are gradually training your mind to

become less reactive and calmer. You will find that this has other, wider benefits.

Your stress levels will diminish; you will be able to concentrate more, and for

longer; you will feel more centred; you will have greater patience; you may become

less judgemental. Keep on doing it and the benefits will accumulate.

Different meditations: There is no one way each meditation is different, even if it

follows the same pattern. Meditations vary considerably. Some meditations can be

dramatic, visionary, or life-changing; however, these are fairly rare. In some

meditations you may fall asleep. Just observe the differences. Don’t get caught up

in the ‘glamour’ of a powerful meditation.

There are hundreds of specific types of meditation. People have been meditating in

different cultures and different religions (including Christianity) for hundreds and

even thousands of years.

Mindfulness Practice: When we are stressed, we often become absent-minded; or

we may be doing something (like reading a book) and we realise that we are not

aware of what we are doing; or we may indulge in some ‘mindless’ activity (like

watching afternoon TV or playing Sudoku) as an escape from our problems: our

mind is distracted. When we are on ‘automatic pilot’ like this, our body is doing one

thing and our mind is doing another. Accidents and mistakes can happen. Negative

thoughts can build up and coalesce. We are trying to find better solutions, but we

are constantly monitoring (and judging) how we are doing – and probably repeating

old patterns (because we don’t know anything else): this is ultimately

counterproductive. On a day-to-day basis, mindlessness is not very productive and

is often quite harmful.

Mindfulness means – paying attention – in a particular way – on purpose – in the

present moment – non-judgementally. As a practice, it can be very useful for

anxiety, depression, better pain control, anger management, obsessive-compulsive

tendencies, and self-healing, as well as for stress. The core skills of mindfulness are

– Be Aware and Let Go.

Mindfulness practice is part of the practice of Buddhism, and has therefore been

around for about 2,500 years. Recently it has been accepted as a valuable asset

within Cognitive Behavioural Therapy in the NHS. “What goes around, comes

around.” Socrates also once said, “The unexamined life is not worth living for a

human being.” He also said, “As for me, all I know is that I know nothing.” This is

saying something similar.

Being Aware – is literally just that: being aware that you have a pain here; or that

you find this or that activity stressful; that you don’t have the energy for ‘this’ any

longer; or you are irritated by ‘that’ person – or rather when that person does ‘that’.

Letting Go – is literally just that: letting go of your irritation, your pain, your

stress, your boredom and fatigue; freeing yourself from any attachments or fixed

ideas.

Practicing Mindfulness: You can start practicing mindfulness by introducing

‘mindful’ meditations into your regular routine of meditation. Let mindfulness (or

awareness of something) become the ‘focus’ of your meditation. In the meditation,

done as before, become aware of every feeling or sensation in your body; every

thought and every noise outside – the ticking of a clock, the distant traffic, bird

song. And then let these perceptions – or the thoughts attached to the perceptions

– go! Expand and extend your awareness – and then just let any thoughts or

perceptions go: there is a continual process of gentle emptying. Try to stay in the

moment: what am I aware of now? What now? And then let go and move on to the

next moment.

Then you can extend your mindfulness practice into other things that you are

doing. How am I doing this? How interesting! What am I feeling now? How

interesting! And now let this go. The moment passes: you are doing something else:

How interesting! And now move on again to the next moment.

You can also go deeper into what you are doing. When eating a tangerine, become

aware of the texture of the outside of the crinkly orange skin compared to the

smooth white texture of the inside. Be aware of the tiny spurt of juice and scent as

you peel the tangerine; the separation of the segments and the peeling off of any

pith; the explosion of taste as you bite into a juicy segment; the tangy, sweet smell;

the discarded peel. You can become aware of the tree on which it grew in some

foreign country; the water and sunshine necessary for it to grow; all the people who

grew it, picked it, transported it and sold it; the number of hours worked and miles

it has travelled to get into your hand. What a depth and miracle of mindfulness

there is in this one action of eating a tangerine. And now you can move on to the

next action, but you will move on feeling differently (hopefully more pleasant and

peaceful) because you have done this action differently, mindfully.

When you are doing the washing up, standing at the kitchen sink, don’t do it

thinking about this, or worrying about that, try doing it mindfully. Just ‘do’ the

washing up: become aware of the feel of the warm water on your hands; or the

scent of the soap liquid; the feel of the action of the mop as it travels around the

plate, getting the food off; the way some bits stick and some bits of food don’t; the

change in the appearance of the plate; the sight of the water running freely across

the plate as you put it under the tap to rinse; and the satisfying clunk as it goes

into the rack. You may then become aware of the sunshine (or weather) outside the

kitchen; the bird song or street noises; other people in the house – these are all

part of the mindful experience of doing the washing up (or whatever you are doing).

If you catch yourself thinking about tomorrow’s shopping list, or what you are

going to have to say to this person at work, stop doing the washing up and write

the shopping list, or makes some notes in your Filofax, then return to doing the

washing up mindfully. Stay in the moment as much as possible. If you don’t like

doing the washing up and want to finish it quickly or jump to the next moment (so

as to watch TV or eat dessert), you may be equally incapable of fully being in that

moment and enjoying the TV or the dessert: your mind may be jumping to the next

action and then to the next, so that you are never at peace with yourself and what

you are doing. Focus on this one, just this one, and you may find that you quite

enjoy the process of doing the washing up mindfully.

The Process of Mindfulness: There is really no end to this process. Each

meditation, each mindful action builds and grows. The further you go in (into the

territory of mindfulness, into yourself), the bigger the territory gets. You will slow

down a little; you will become calmer and less reactive; you will probably look more

at the wider picture and become more thoughtful. It is so simple – and it is not, for

a moment, easy! This is definitely ‘the road less travelled’ – yet it is a very rich

journey in itself. We are not trying to get anywhere; we are making every moment

count; we are enriching the journey itself and travelling well. We can even make

each step that we take (literally) mindful: this is then a walking meditation.

Adapted from Thich Nhat Hahn: ‘Peace is Every Step’

TRANSFORMATIVE PROCESSES

There can also be ‘transformative’ elements or ‘transcendental’ components

involved in the process. If this is the case, people with some experience of these

transformative processes should become involved at some point, (and this does not

necessarily require a priest, shaman or a guru, they can also be psychotherapists).

Psychotherapists often have training in, and understanding of, intrapersonal,

interpersonal and transpersonal and other types of changes and how these are all

interconnected. They can help empower the person to use their personal resources,

promote self-responsibility and develop better cognitive functions.

Please be aware that these transformative components may take some time

to work through or achieve, but there should be a sense of what might be a good

direction or outcome at a reasonably early phase in the intervention process.

Hopefully the actual crisis will be over relatively quickly, but the transformative

process can continue, sometimes gently, sometimes powerfully, sometimes for

years.

Please be very careful here: in transformation (as opposed to change) much of

the new type of process, or the strangeness of the symptoms, require a sort of re-

assessment or re-integration depending upon these new perspectives, and which

help ‘expand the frame’ of their situation. Whilst this may mean a form of re-

education for the person in crisis as well as for those around them, please ensure

that you are not forcing them into such a new perspective, which is more familiar

to you, than maybe relevant to or appropriate for them.

This is especially relevant where one considers whether the person is, or is not,

fitting into the Spiritual Crisis or Spiritual Emergency category (see later). What

has also been mentioned, and now is re-iterated, is that there are sometimes

significant cultural differences, which can affect these processes: weird and

wonderful in one culture, might be scary in another, and normal in a third: and all

of these cultures may co-exist in the same city or country. It is important to try to

accept the transformative process exactly and precisely for what it is and how it

manifests itself at any one moment.

What follows now – in the next section – are some very different set of ideas

that may help change some of the more fixed or conservative attitudes that tend

not to be so helpful for a person in crisis: from themselves and from others.

Doctors and psychiatrists may be helped in such changes by assuring them that

“Spiritual Crisis” is now a category in DSM IV (see Appendix).

PART TWO

SPIRITUAL EMERGENCE & EMERGENCIES

There is a lot more material around nowadays about how to identify a person in a

spiritual crisis; what the definition of a Spiritual Emergence process is; and what a

Spiritual Emergency actually is; the different types of Spiritual Emergencies; the

formation of a Crisis Group; psycho-spiritual process-oriented work; and useful

strategies in dealing with Spiritual Emergencies; etc. For the purpose of this book, I

am using the terminology of “Spiritual Emergence” and “Spiritual Emergency” to

refer to a sudden break or involuntary change in a person’s fundamental systems

of belief, spiritual activity and psychic behaviour, often accompanied by or

immediately following a crisis, or a seemingly psychotic episode, or extraordinary

behaviour.

However this sudden transition can also be seen (usually retrospectively) as part of

a long-term developmental process that has been largely unconscious and

unrecognized until that point, and thus is generally unprepared for, and often

relatively unaccepted. Stanislav Grof defines a number of different manifestations

of “Spiritual Emergencies”, but the common denominator of all crises of

transformation (according to him) is the manifestations of different aspects of the

psyche that were previously unconscious.2 In this sense, it can also be seen as a

perfectly normal (psycho-spiritual) aspect of our human development.

Whilst there has been a long tradition of writings about spiritual development,

these have also been pushed to one side and denigrated as ‘esoteric’ or ‘mystic’

because materialism and the need to “make a buck” or “get on” with one’s career

have been considered as priorities. For example, some of Rumi’s writing speaks

directly to this process, but he was a mystical poet writing in the 14th century in

the Middle East. Much more is being written nowadays about these aspects of

spiritual development that is more within ‘mainstream’ thought: C.J. Jung referred

to the process of the emerging spirit as a “moral obligation” to live out and express

what one learns when one has had contact with other aspects of one’s Self. Joseph

Campbell and books like Iron John and Women Who Run With Wolves or the work of

Robert Johnson (see Reading List) are also helping to chart the spiritual path.

A frequently asked question is: “What is the difference between a Spiritual

Emergency and a psychotic episode?” Part of the problem of differentiation is a

cultural one. We live in such a very materially and medically orientated culture that

it is sometimes very difficult to step outside of these paradigms and the parameters

usually blind us and bind us. When we do so, voluntarily or involuntarily, we have

no positive images or support to reinforce our journey, nor any routes or maps for

our process. We thus resort to the ‘normal’ negative images of people in crisis –

either as being sick, mentally ill, or just crazy – and this (‘normally’) means that we

need to separate ourselves from such people and exclude them from us, or even

protect ourselves from them. Nowadays we may also think that we need to protect

them!

Just to suggest that we could perhaps re-frame these extra-ordinary processes into

a much more positive light is pretty radical, even without actually trying to do so.

To suggest that we might perhaps actually involve ourselves in these peoples’

psychic processes and possibly even interact with them, or maybe even learn

2 : Stan & Christina Grof: The Stormy Search for Self (Tarcher) 1992

something from them, is seen by some very well-established professional people as

totally off-the-wall. If one goes a step further and actually does something, there is

sometimes even an accusation of acting unprofessionally to ensure that one keeps

in line. But ‘off-the-wall’ and ‘out-of-line’ is sometimes where people actually are

when they are in their crisis, or in a Spiritual Emergency, or whatever you like to

call it, and maybe we (the professionals) need to be able to step into these areas in

order to reach these people, and to find out more about where these places are, and

what rules exist there, in order to help them better.

Some different cultures go so far as to elevate those amongst them who have such

spiritual experiences themselves by allowing them to become their shamans,

priests & priestesses, visionary leaders, or even gurus, whereas we in the Western

World, as a culture, usually actively discriminate against those who have such

experiences. We think they are crazy; we medicalise them (at best); we sometimes

even take away their citizen’s rights and incarcerate them (as well), or “re-arrange

them till they are sane”, chemically, electrically or surgically (at worst). How a

particular culture treats its children, the poor, the criminal and the insane is often

an indication or a reflection of its nature (see the work of Michel Foucault). How

these people are treated often does not show the essential goodness or civilized

sophistication of that society. Those different, more primitive, cultures have either

learnt, over time – or have never lost the fact – that their society can actually

benefit from such peoples’ processes, or it even needs such people, and cannot

survive healthily without them. So, just maybe, many of us all have a lot of work to

do, turning some of our prejudices around.

Imagine a culture – just for a moment – where normal teenage puberty and

adolescence is essentially denied: variations of this process are seen as illnesses

needing treatment. Instead of saying: “Oh, dizzy spells and puppy fat are perfectly

normal. They’ll pass”, we would get a situation where the growth of breasts would

mean a mastectomy; and beards, pubic hair and underarm hair would mean

extensive depilation, or chemical treatments to inhibit the growth of hair.

This is actually how we react, as a society (not to the physical symptoms of a

denied process of adolescence) but to the psychological symptoms of a denied

spiritual maturation process. We treat the symptoms of this process as a pathology

and often medicalize the treatment of the person. “They are hearing voices; they

must be psychotic!”

By the way, it is perfectly possible, and quite common, for someone to have a

Spiritual Emergence process and a psychotic episode, or a major trauma or illness

and a Spiritual Emergence process. They are not necessarily mutually exclusive.

However, here and now, we are concerned with aspects involved in the going

through and the recovery from such events, and we will delve more into this in this

part of the book. A ‘healing’ implies that things are restored, a ‘recovery’ implies

things are back to normal; neither may be appropriate. In the Reading List there is

also a mention of a book by Podvoll, who speaks about recovery from mental

illness. He claims that the principles of healing and recovery are very similar, even

though these two things, mental illness and spiritual emergency, can be very

different. I think it is more a process of ‘going through’: you will be changed by this,

things can be ‘normal’ again, but they will also be very different; Neitzsche spoke of

“What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger”, and there is some truth in that.

However, going through this process can mean that you realize that the shallow

and materialistic life that you led before is the one that now seems crazy, so we

could say instead, “By going crazy, you become sane.”

Anyway, what follows now is a relatively brief synopsis of the various different types

of Spiritual Emergency. The first ten or twelve types of symptoms are listed by

Grof3. However, I have added to these several more categories from my own clinical

experiences. The descriptions of the different types might help you to discern what

is happening, or has already happened, to the person who is having, or has had, a

crisis. Was it just a major illness, or a mental illness, or were other more spiritual

components present? If they were these other elements present, then physical

recovery, gentle exercise, good food, etc., which are all components of physical

recovery, need to be incorporated as well as the other components necessary for a

healthy spiritual emergence process, many of which are mentioned here.

It is unfortunately necessary to state this very clearly; nowhere, at no time, do we

advocate someone coming off medication, prescribed by a doctor, without that

doctor being informed. Dealing with someone in crisis as a Spiritual Emergency is

NOT an alternative to any form of medical treatment: it is a perspective which is an

adjunct to whatever is happening with them - physically, medically, emotionally,

psychologically, or generally in their life at this moment in time.

The crisis, however traumatic it was, can often be converted into something

ultimately beneficial, by treating it as a process of the emerging spirit. This

connects with the “acorn” theory of James Hillman 4, where our genius, our daimon,

or our guardian angel, motivates our growth in particular ways uniquely designed

for that particular person at that particular moment. The crisis just happens to be

taking this form, in this person, at this time. There are a few exceptions, of course.

But spiritual strength can emerge from such a crisis, and a new determination to

lead a much ‘better’ life. This is often accompanied by an increase in wisdom,

gained through the crisis events, which is part of the essential transformational

process. Then crisis itself can just be a trigger for these events, and have no further

bearing on the actual transformational process. The crisis can also contain very

significant components that shape the later spiritual development. Everyone is

unique.

Eventually there develops a better ‘practice’ or lifestyle, one component of which

regularly acknowledges that “Something” which is greater than all of us – you can

call it God, Allah, Yahweh, Vishnu, Gaia, or whatever. We move into new territories

of the mind, and beyond the mind, into new realms of existence, sometimes only

previously accessible through the use of drugs (which also distort perception of

these spaces). This is the maturational process into full spiritual emergence; and it

happens all the time to ordinary people all over the planet through normal

processes like falling in love, being hurt, having babies, working, burying parents,

etc. Most of the time that it happens, it is within normal levels of tolerance and is

just not fully recognised, and so it is unfortunate that we have to point a finger at

aspects of such a normal, healthy development: We have to call it “Spiritual

Emergence”, so that people who are go through some of the more extreme forms of

3 The Stormy Search for the Self: Understanding & Living with Spiritual Emergency. Grof, Christina

& Grof, Stanislav; (Thorsons) 1991

4 The Soul’s Code; Hillman, James. (Bantam) 1997

it, can be put into a similar context, and not be treated as aberrant or abnormal.

Most of the time, the “Spiritual Emergency” – the ‘emergency” part of it - has been

created, not by the processes of the person involved, but by the inability of the

environment around that person to contain that person’s particular process of

Spiritual Emergence at this moment in time. In many ways, the environment of the

Findhorn Foundation, or other similar spiritual communities, has allowed many

people to have their process there, relatively un-traumatically, surrounded by

others in a caring and supportive environment. I have seen notices on a member’s

bedroom door, “Do Not Disturb! Having a Spiritual Emergency!” This is great; they

are acknowledging it themselves. But we have also sometimes been called out in

the middle of the night, because someone is having a real emergency situation,

spiritual or otherwise, and urgent appropriate action is needed. The energies of

some of these places are very powerful, can affect people unused to them, and they

do need handling properly.

In the 1970s and 1980s, Stan Grof and his helpers categorised a number of

different types, or channels, through which people experienced their “Spiritual

Emergencies”. This is not theoretical categorisation; it is empirical research. They

did not invent these categories: they just collected different types from their

experience, and then described them. As mentioned, some more categories have

been added to this list since then; some by me, some by colleagues; again not from

theory but from direct experience. These are what Spiritual Emergence processes

can really look like.

However, we first have to do a little check, to ensure that we are not

misinterpreting something for what we might like it to be. We have to ensure that

the person is really only having a Spiritual Emergence process, and that there is no

pathology, or other circumstance, that might otherwise be covered up or ignored by

this process.

A Spiritual Emergency, which might be more suitable to be treated by alternative

responses, can be similar to, but very different from, pathological psychoses or

aspects of mental illnesses or conditions, which are often more suitably contained

(but not necessarily cured as of now) by more traditional methods like

hospitalization & psychotropic medication. What follows next are those conditions

which might indicate whether it is appropriate or possible to work with a person

from the perspective of a Spiritual Emergence process. These criteria can also be

used as contra-indications. If some of these criteria are present, then it may not be

possible to work with this person on their Spiritual Emergence process – at this

moment in time.

CRITERIA TO HELP DEFINE A SPIRITUAL EMERGENCY AND

CONDITIONS UNDER WHICH IT MAY BE APPROPRIATE TO WORK WITH

SOMEONE AS A SPIRITUAL EMERGENCE PROCESS.

a) There are episodes or experiences which involve changes in consciousness

(altered states) or significant changes in perceptual / emotional / cognitive or

psychological functioning that incorporate a psycho-spiritual perspective.

b) There is an absence of organic brain disorders underlying the abnormal

mental / emotional functioning of the psyche (i.e.: the symptoms of some

types of epilepsy (temporal lobe) can be mistaken for psychoses, but are

easily curable with a non-reactive pill: changes in the production of

dopamine / serotonin in the brain can also significantly affect the person’s

mental and emotional state.

c) There is an absence of a physical disease in another organ system, which

will permit the person to undergo safely the physical and emotional stresses

that can accompany the working through of a transpersonal crisis - AND

there is sufficient ego and physical strength available in order to go through

such a (possibly powerful) transformative process.

Such an illness or organic condition does not mean that it is impossible to

work from an S.E. perspective, but it makes things more difficult; other

factors need to be taken into account; or the working with or treatment of the

illness / organic condition becomes more relevant.

d) (This is an essential condition.) There exists in the person the ability to

see their condition as an inner psychological process and approach it in an

internalized way with the capacity to form working co-operative relationships

with people around them. This thus often excludes people in severe paranoid

states, persecutory delusions and hallucinations, socio-pathic or violent

behaviour, and cases where there is a lot of projection, exteriorization and

acting out; or it excludes normal working with these people when these

conditions are present, as one then may be working with them to get back

within the ‘comfort zone’ of a normal therapeutic relationship.

e) There is an absence of a long history of conventional psychiatric treatment

and hospitalization which tend to make the working out of a transpersonal

crisis much more difficult, or sometimes even impossible, due to the physical

/emotional / mental damage to the psyche from the medical or psychiatric

treatments and institutionalization to date.

f) Since the line between a Spiritual Emergency and a Psychosis is unclear,

any decision made should involve clear and maintainable agreements. If

these cannot be maintained, therapeutic work stops, until they are restored

Firm and final diagnoses or decisions are inappropriate. This implies that

there must be a continual assessment and supervisory process paralleling

the personal (or transpersonal) process.

g) (This is an essential condition.) There exists a safe, supportive

environment in which the person can go through some of the more dramatic

or demanding stages with people available to assist their process, if needed,

who have had similar experiences, and/or professional training, and/or who

are very good for that person.

This last condition (of a safe and supportive environment) implies either

special residential facilities and /or a special ‘crisis’ group essentially formed

around the person in crisis. There therefore has to be a special place, a

special crisis group, special agreements, and people specially assigned. If

these criteria can be met, then – and only then – treating the crisis as a

transpersonal process or a Spiritual Emergency might be more appropriate

than a traditional psycho-therapeutic or a psychiatric approach.

There is sometimes a dichotomy between:

(a) Taking the person out of their environment into a much more specialized

environment (a Crisis Centre, a Retreat House, a Sanctuary, etc.) where the

person can have their crisis more safely, and with more resources to hand;

and

(b) Forming a crisis group around that person, in their own environment, using

a ‘grass-roots’ approach with some specialized input.

These are not mutually exclusive. Sometimes one is more appropriate than the

other; other times first one, then the other, are appropriate. However, if the

crisis centre approach is used, great care and preparation must be taken

when the person is eventually re-introduced back into their previous

environment (see Crucial Support Issues).

Further reading on the concepts of a Spiritual Emergency can be had from the

Grof's book, The Stormy Search for Self (Tarcher) and other specific Spiritual

Emergency books in the Reading List. There are also Internet articles by

David Lukoff (and others) added as an Appendix to this book, on this precise

subject.

The definition of a Spiritual Emergency, as a “religious or spiritual problem”, has

now been included into DSM IV.5

5 DSM IV is the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition, of the

American Psychiatric Association. It uses a multi-axial classification: Axis I is for clinical

syndromes; Axis II for personality disorders; Axis III for general medical conditions; Axis

IV for psychosocial and environmental problems; and Axis V for Global Assessment of

Functioning scale. Thus an example of a DSM-IV multi-axial diagnosis might be: Axis I:

Alcohol Dependence; Axis II Antisocial personality; Axis III Cirrhosis; Axis IV: Arrest,

Drunken Driving, Death of a Child; Axis V: Level of current functioning 45: (serious

symptoms: e.g. suicidal ideation, severe obsessional rituals, frequent disruptive / antisocial

behaviour; OR a serious impairment in social occupation or functioning: e.g. no friends,

unable to keep a job, criminal conviction & imprisonment).

SYMPTOMS OF / TYPES OF SPIRITUAL EMERGENCE PROCESSES OR

SPIRITUAL EMERGENCIES

The common denominator of all crises of transformation is the manifestations of

different aspects of the psyche that were previously unconscious.

S. & C. Grof: “The Stormy Search for Self”

The following list does not mean that these types or forms of process appear by

themselves or are neatly differentiated. Neither are the following examples

completely inclusive. The psyche is a continuum with few boundaries, many levels,

and very many different dimensions. Often aspects can appear together, or in

succession, or cyclically. Categorising actual case histories and then creating an

observable differentiation between them originally created this very empirical list.

From my clinical experiences, I have added to Grof’’s original list (the items marked

by a •). This list of manifestations is not necessarily complete.

An Opening to Life Myths or Archetypes

Where one perceives one's environment and one’s own process in terms and

symbolic images relating to much larger perspectives. Issues of power thus become

Dreams of Kingship; a cave can represent an Entrance to the Underworld: decision-

making becomes the struggle between Good and Evil. Other examples include:

Communing with Nature; that one has a Mission in Life, etc. All these sorts or any

sort of these experiences can fall into this category; and you can almost hear the

‘capitalisation’ of the words.

A Shamanic Journey

Where elements of the person’s transformational process relate to similar

experiences that are often found in earlier, tribal, or more primitive societies; like

perhaps the native American-Indian, or such as those described by Carlos

Casteneda. Experiences such as ‘vision quests’; the appearance of ‘spirit guides’ or

‘allies’; preparations involving fasting & purification; journeys to the spirit world,

the ‘crisis’ often involves a feeling of total annihilation (or death), followed by

resurrection and re-birth to celestial realms or contact with ancestors, or the Great

Spirit; special connections with natural elements or an identification with

particular type of animal; development of different healing powers and certain types

of spiritual illness; can all form a part of this classification.

Communication with spirit guides or channelling

Where someone is both getting and giving out informational material that seems

quite disconnected from their normal self, and has a strong consistent spiritual

quality and often is couched in teaching or guiding terms, either for the individual

concerned or often for people in general. Sometimes the ‘channel’ is in a trance

(more like a medium) and unaware of this material, or sometimes they are acting

more consciously. The information can be relayed by speech, in trance, or by

automatic writing, telepathic transfer, visions, etc. Well-known examples include:

the works of Alice Bailey, Eileen Caddy & Dorothy McLean (Findhorn Foundation);

the Hindu Vedas & Upanishads, Book of Mormon, The Course of Miracles, Seth

Speaks, etc.

Near-death experiences

People's experiences of being close to death or even of dying and then coming back

to life can (nearly always) lead to a form of spiritual opening and a transformational

process. One’s consciousness can detach from the body and float around an

accident scene or a hospital surgery or distant locations (often to see a loved one);

or where there is an experience of a passage through a tunnel to a brilliant &

beautiful source of light and there is a presence of love, as well, then with a

message that one needs to return. These elements are the most common ones and

are not confined to people from any particular religion. All these elements can

(often) result in a profound subsequent shift in perspective and a new

determination for the individual to live their life in a much more congruent way,

often dedicated to the service of others.

Kundalini Awakening

Where powerful energy is flowing, often in episodes, sometimes quite surprisingly

through the body. This can take the form of cycles of jerking, shaking or sweating;

spontaneous movement into yogic positions; rushes of energy, often up the spine;

hypersensitivity to stimuli; powerful waves of accompanying emotion; a decreased

ability to control their body voluntarily; sensory manifestations - seeing bright

lights, hearing inner sounds, smelling fragrances; sometimes intense sexual or

orgiastic feelings; what is sometimes called “sartori”; or an experience of the

powerful opening the chakras (energy centres) of the body; and, more worryingly,

possible simulation of, or stimulation of, severe medical problems. It can also be

seen as a spiritual purification of your body as this powerful ‘body’ energy sweeps

(or blasts) away, cell by cell, the detritus that has accumulated over the years in a

transformative spiritual experience.

Episodes of Unitive Consciousness or Peak Experiences

Where the person experiences being ‘at one’ with other people; or other things; or

the whole world; or the cosmos; or merging with God. There is a sense of

transcending space & time and there can be an experience of infinity or eternity.

"The emotions associated with this state range from profound peace and serenity to

exuberant joy and ecstatic rapture." Grof: Spiritual Emergency. Abraham Maslow

described these states in depth, calling them ‘Peak Experiences’. They are not a

hallucination or form of mental disease. Eastern philosophers refer to something

like this as “kensho”, “satori” or "samadhi", and these type of enlightenment

experiences typically lead to better functioning, a more laid-back way of life and the

goal of "self-actualisation".

Emergence of a Karmic pattern or "past-life" memories

Where experiential sequences occur of what seem to be 'past-life' situations or

encounters (often connected with partners, parents or experiences of death). Beliefs

in reincarnation exist in nearly all major religions, except Muslim and Christian

(post 553 AD). There are however quite definite experiences or sensations for many

people (of all religions) in this category. They frequently have a powerful

transformative or therapeutic result and can often "explain" otherwise

incomprehensible difficulties in their life up to this point. They can intrude quite

powerfully and cause considerable confusion unless integrated.

Psychic Opening or the awakening of extra-sensory perceptions (esp)

The emergence of certain paranormal abilities is quite common and quite powerful,

and thus is also potentially quite difficult to deal with. It is easy to get "hooked into

the symptom" and forget that this is just one aspect of a much deeper spiritual

awakening process. And this is also where power can easily be abused. Out-of-body

experiences, telepathic or empathic abilities, spiritual or psychic healing powers,

pre-cognition, communication with other dimensions (nature spirits, devas, etc.),

mediumistic identification, synchronicitous experiences and many more, all form

quite common aspects of this category. Sometimes these abilities are feared and

thus rejected, either by the person or by those around them. Alternatively they can

become "Glamorous Powers"6 and be abused by the recipient. When they are not

abused, they lead one further into one’s spiritual development: they are not a end

in themselves.

Experience or Close-encounters with UFO's:

Irrespective of whether or not this type of experience has actually happened, or

whether alien spaceships actually exist, and irrespective of whether or not the

person is judged by others as being insane or not – peoples’ descriptions of these

types of experiences, and their attitudes to these experiences, and the way these

experiences are subsequently incorporated into their lives, and the resulting

transformational changes that occur as a result, allow these experiences to be

included with the other transformational experiences: examples also include

‘experiences’ of alien abduction, or alien insemination.

Psychological Renewal through a Return to the Centre:

The deep "renewal process" is where the psyche appears to be involved in a

battlefield where the archetypes of Good & Evil, Light & Dark fight it out: Lord of

the Rings stuff. There is a pre-occupation with themes of cosmic struggle and

death; there is a fascination with opposites and polarities. People who are having

these experiences:

"… experience themselves as the centre of fantastic events that have cosmic

relevance and are important for the future of the world. Their visionary

states take them farther & farther back - through their own history and the

history of humanity, all the way to the creation of the world and the original

ideal state of paradise. In this process, they seem to strive for perfection,

trying to correct the things that went wrong in the past."

Grof: Spiritual Emergency.

Things can then start to get a bit better. Quite often people having such

experiences might get involved in a form of "sacred marriage"; either in imagery or

even in reality – possibly even projected onto someone else - and then things

become fantasized as "ideal". They have supposedly now integrated their masculine

& feminine. However the crisis is by no means over, even though everything now

seems wonderful. Nothing has been really integrated or worked through, just

experienced. Some of these attitudes can be found around in certain “New Age”

therapies, like “Soul Renewal” or Re-birthing.

Possession:

This is where the individual seems to take on the characteristics of a totally

different personality or becomes ‘possessed’ with an interest in a particular field.

Sometimes there is a ‘shadow’ element in this: it can also be seen as ‘evil’: it can be

compulsive: it can also be someone who is dominated by their environment or

surroundings. e.g. the Army martinet who will only ever do things by the "book".

There has been a lot of work being done with Multiple Personality Disorders -

called work with "possession states" though I might disagree as MPDs could equally

well be the splitting up of the personality into fragments under situations of

intolerable psychic stress in order to preserve aspects of the Self and then creating

a personality around that fragment as one is unable to integrate otherwise.

6 viz: the series of novels by Susan Howarth about the Anglo-Catholic church, one of which has this

title.

Integration work could centre around the topics of respecting the personality,

validating it and dis-empowering the process or the need to maintain the

separation. ‘The remedy is always inside the experience itself.’ Wilhelm Reich said:

"The way we got in (to the trap) is also the way out."

Another description of possession is, “that we can distinguish it from mental

illness because the sufferer is sane; he feels he’s periodically being invaded by a

malign force, but this isn’t a delusion stemming from paranoia. However, the condition

is extremely rare and the resemblance to some forms of mental illness makes it

difficult to diagnose. … The classical exorcism of a possessed person requires

extensive preparation and an army of helpers - … a psychiatrist, a psychotherapist

and possibly a social worker in attendance along with at least three strong men, all of

whom, ideally, should be priests.”7

Unfortunately, some ‘cases’ of (what might be) possession are treated very

badly by ‘priests’ or ‘ministers’ within the various religions: there have been some

cases of some people really suffering badly or even dying as a result of an extreme

exorcism process. I am also sure that some people have been ‘saved’ by proper

exorcists.

Synthesis of Forms: Several of the above experienced simultaneously or serially.

Remember this accumulation of events, in itself, can push someone into a crisis:

one can cope with one of these situations; by two or maybe three might cause the

lid to blow, or a psychotic depression to set in if your psychic boundaries cannot

expand to incorporate these, your limits have been overwhelmed, or your sense of

yourself flooded.

This is the end of the Grof’s list: Other possible clusters of symptoms follow:

• Addictions, drug and alcohol dependency: Christina Grof also lists

dependencies as a possible form of spiritual emergency, from her own experiences,

and from others, and devotes a whole chapter to it in their book, Spiritual

Emergency (see Book List). She states that the craving for the drug, or whatever, is

often a craving for transcendence, the Higher Self, or God, but in a lost and

inappropriate form. The Grofs also state that addictions can be developed during

spiritual emergencies as a way of easing the stress. Many addicts have highly

developed intuitive senses, or visionary and precognitive capacities, and this has

given them many troubles and even contributed to their addictive behaviour as

they try to avoid difficulties with their psyche.

• Social Forces: Alternatively these sorts of processes can be ‘acted out’ on a

sociological level involving us all. William Wilberforce ‘took on’ the issue of slavery

and eventually managed to have it made illegal. He changed as a result of the

process: from a philanthropic Member of Parliament via a “conversion experience”

to a committed Christian, resulting in major changes to his lifestyle and a lifelong

concern for reform.

There is the current sociological phenomenon with childhood sexual abuse.

For many the emergence of childhood sexual abuse out of the closet into open

discussion and eventual acceptance was like a revelation: we did not now have to

struggle against the disbelief of society that “this sort of thing just couldn’t happen

in our family”: but it often did. Now it is part of the mainstream fabric of society

and we are realising that most abusers were themselves abused. Something similar

might also be applied to the current fascination with serial killers.

7 Howatch, Susan: Mystical Paths (Fontana) 1992: pp 457-8

With the advent of globalization, such social forces have an exaggerated effect

on the whole planet. We need to consider the wider aspects. Now we are seeing

again the renewal of the demonization of the ‘enemy’: Saddam Hussein has been

called "The Butcher of Baghdad" and there is “an Axis of Evil” and a “War against

Terrorism”. The tabloid newspapers and Hollywood often fuel such perspectives,

and maybe occasionally even help us on towards a collective form of Spiritual

Emergence process whereby the exotic lives of their “stars” become more normal

and accepted. They can also work the other way and demonize. Films portray

subjects like contact with the dead; star gates; the development of psychic

phenomena; possession; shape-changing; etc. and so begin (in a perverse way) to

normalize some of these processes. Such imagery is very powerful and works on

the collective. We can even see whole groups caught up in such processes, where

literally hundreds of cases of child abuse with satanic rituals are diagnosed mostly

erroneously. To the individuals caught up in such social forces, these can trigger

off a Spiritual Emergence process.

Another form of spiritual emergence process, in the social field, could be the

Olympic Games: the ‘winner’ is crowned with laurel leaves, is treated like a God (on

Mount Olympus) and has achieved “gold” status (gold often being a synonym for

spiritual transcendence. Sportsmen and women often describe the process of

‘going through the pain barrier’, working with their inner self, facing their fear of

failure (daemon), and other experiences in terms very similar to descriptions of a

spiritual journey.

• A psychotic episode: This experience can be an extraordinary shake-up to the

whole person’s psychic system. Sometimes the person involved cannot contain

their increasing spiritual energy within the bounds of their own psyche, so their

psyche overloads, or floods, and they have what is essentially a psychotic episode:

a real one, not a mis-diagnosed spiritual emergency. But this psychotic episode

can, in itself, also be a very significant part of their spiritual journey. In the episode

itself, there is almost no meta-communication; but there is often a significant

period of isolation away from work, family and friends. There is quite often a sense

of ego-destruction and a realization that you don’t really know yourself at all. You

may not also have realized significant aspects of the society you lived in and the

people around you, and how their attitudes to you changed dramatically when you

changed. Pain can be caused and damage can be done, by the process itself, and

also according to the type of ‘treatment’ and the length and severity of the psychotic

episode. Once the episode is over and the person has recovered and is restored

back into their society, their spiritual emergence process can then proceed more or

less unhindered. They will have to integrate this psychotic experience and also

work against the ‘shock’, the ‘shame’ and the ‘black-listing’ of having become

psychotic; any damage that may have been caused by psychotropic medication; or

guilt caused by them causing others distress. This is also a type of spiritual

emergence process that it is not advisable to repeat.

• Major illnesses and accidents: These often result in an enforced period of

reflection, a dramatic change of behaviour, and an extended process of recovery

that can be cumulatively transformative, and they sometimes also have a profound

spiritual component. Often, for the first time we are faced with the very real &

immanent possibility of our death. Of course, not all of the people suffering from

these illnesses and accidents are having a spiritual emergency, but it is often a

significant life crisis, and the opportunity to develop spiritually is there, as ever.

The essential parameters all exist and it is often ‘used’ as such. People sometimes

pray seriously for the first time in their life; they confront their mortality and their

belief systems about a life after death, a larger cosmology, or the purpose and value

of their life to date. If we are to normalize this process of Spiritual Emergence, then

we must include the ways most ‘normal’ people actually change their lives. These

experiences happen to very normal people and many of them happen; just read the

Reader’s Digest regularly and find out what ‘normal’ people write about their

serious illnesses.

• Direct religious experience or conversion: This is a form of experience where,

quite naturally, and well within socially accepted formats, people have these sorts

of direct experiences, usually connected to an established religion. Leonard

Cheshire, a famous war-time RAF flying officer, read the Bible one night, had a

religious experience, converted to Roman Catholicism, and went and founded the

Cheshire Homes: a number of charitable nursing homes for ex-service men and

women. Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus had a vision of Christ, whose

followers up to then he had been persecuting. He then converted to Christianity,

became the Apostle Paul and wrote a number of books (of the Bible) and many

letters to other people, becoming a major force in the early Christian church –

though not always for its ultimate good. Joan of Arc, a French peasant girl, heard

angelic voices, which told her to save France, and so she goes and does the

unthinkable, for a girl then, guided by her voices. She puts on male clothing, goes

on a journey to see the king, and then raises an army, which defeats the English.

There are many examples of this type of religious or spiritual emergence process.

The hundreds of thousands of other men and women who have been struck by a

direct religious experience, or who have received a vision, and have been

transformed by such an experience, have changed their lives and have devoted

their energies to the service of others: dare we really say these experiences were not

aspects of their spiritual emergence process?

• Ritual Initiation: In some cultures and societies, every person is still seen as a

potential initiate. At some point in their development, often around puberty, they

are removed from their normal society (parents, village, etc.) and put into the hands

of others: (the men, women, elders or priests). They are given a prolonged

experience of teaching, often frugal feeding, nearly always extended isolation, the

experience of personal surrender, isolation, and often an experience involving a

high degree of pain. There may be a form of circumcision, breaking the hymen, or

ritual scarring. They are also encouraged to share their dreams or visions. They are

sometimes given a new name. This is the way they become an adult: in that society,

and thereafter – if they pass through the ritual successfully – they are able to hunt,

fight, heal, or bear children. The formats differ from tribe to tribe, but the basic

pattern is nearly always there. This process is specifically designed as a

transformative and initiatory experience. It is not just developmental or

sociological; it is also often personally developmental and deeply spiritual. In our

culture, this type of initiatory ritual is found often still in some private secondary

schools, military academies or ‘boot camp’, the priesthood (of course), and medical

doctors also go through something similar in their training.

• Culture shock: For some people it is the direct experience of being projected into

another culture that is the essential trigger. This can also be a culture within their

own culture, a sub-culture, that they had not experienced before: someone who is

suddenly arrested and put into prison; the shock of being a new parent and

realising that ‘mothers’ are a sub-class of society; of becoming retired, or fired and

unemployed and being devalued as a person because one is not in ‘productive’

work; or one is just doing something different, but unacceptable to the rest. These

shocks to the system, the life style, have the effect of shattering many previously

held assumptions, and this can be enough to trigger such a spiritual emergence

process. Of course, in many cases it doesn’t, and we just have to cope with the

experience of feeling that you are suddenly living on an alien planet. For other

people, it is sometimes the impact of experiencing, for the first time, something like

grinding poverty. Many missionaries did not get their true conversion until well into

their tour of duty in the depths of another continent. The different smells, climate,

food, mores, and customs are all a shock to our systems – often a much greater one

than we could possibly realise. Sometimes, something in this new medley of

impressions then gets through to us, and our spiritual emergence process starts.

• Burn-out: This is a later addition to the list, even though it has been implicit for

a long time. There is a book by Dina Glouberman, a psychotherapist and founder of

the Skyros Centre, called The Joy of Burnout, where she writes that often we ignore

our ‘soul-whispering’ against an unhealthy job or relationship. “Your heart has gone

out of something but fear, often of the loss of your sense of identity, drives you to

work even harder or give even more.” Recently surveys by the UN International

Labour Organisation in Britain, the US, Germany, Finland and Poland discovered

that workplace stress, burnout and depression “are spiralling out of control” and

affecting, on average, one in every ten workers. In the UK, it is three out of ten

employees that suffer mental health problems. And 100 million workdays are lost

each year due to stress, at a cost of £5.3 billion.

Burn-out is often not publicly or socially acknowledged because of the various

associations with a mental breakdown. Society also seems to encourage this form

of process by (almost deliberately) not educating people in simple stress reduction

techniques: the Protestant work ethic reigns supreme! The sort of crisis situation

that arises here can become a transcendent opportunity to break out into a

different pattern of work, or of newly creative work, or a s a breakthrough into a

different way of being.

• An intense course of study, especially if transpersonally oriented: Starting a

Ph.D. can change your life! So can studying to enter the priesthood, or become a

Buddhist monk – though there might have been an initial conversion experience

first to start you on that particular path of growth and change. Many students at

university either crack up or drop out, leading to further transformative changes.

Since self-examination is an intense course of study, entering into psychotherapy

can also precipitate a process of growth and change, even though you might have

entered into it to save your marriage or your job.

• Other crisis events: For many others, there were experiences in the most

extreme of situations; in concentration camps; when facing death on a mountain;

during war time; in a shipwreck, a car accident, an earthquake; or some such

similar event, where they have a direct religious or spiritual experience: it becomes

an apotheosis. Their fear of death goes. They experience, at that moment, often a

deep sense of peace. There is often a sense of contact with “something much bigger

than themselves”. They are uplifted and transformed by this experience. They now

know, or have had, direct experience that there is something “other” than

themselves. The horror or danger around them is then viewed totally differently.

Their future life is also often changed radically. By all accounts, they are more

calm, less angry, and more open, at least. They may also do more good deeds, kind

work, and showing a dedication and caring for others. I believe that these types of

events should be included as well in the list of Spiritual Emergency symptoms.

• Normality: Finally, as mentioned before, there are the hundreds of thousands of

people who evolve naturally and easily through their own life experiences, the joys

and the sorrows of normal existence, and develop a deep and lasting spirituality.

Sometimes this is within their established religion and culture, and sometimes they

gently change it, or move into a new society, or marry into a new culture and find

themselves that way. There are perhaps no epiphanies, no visions, no psychotic

episodes, no dramatic changes. These people vastly outweigh the ones we are

writing about, but they don’t talk about this much; it has been natural for them.

They go to church; they pray; they help others; they give to charity; they contribute

in many unseen ways to the betterment of their society; they are dedicated to this

way of life. And they lead a truly natural spiritual life. They (maybe) don’t need a

`Spiritual Emergence process.

ADDENDA:

As mentioned, there can be a succession of these events or symptoms, leading up

to a crisis, or a synthesis of a number of these different forms all in one package.

Example 1: I worked with one person who just did not understand what was

happening to them, and was somewhat hyper-manic as a result and as part of their

process. At one point I gave them a copy of Emma Bragdon’s book, The Call to

Spiritual Emergency (see booklist). Then they said, “Oh, so that is what is happening

to me. I have this symptom, and this one, and some of that one. Now I know more of

what is happening, I can cope.” Their crisis was essentially over with their

expanded understanding and they were then back ‘in control’. We had taken them

to go to a doctor to get some mild sleeping tablets to overcome their lack of sleep

and curb the hyper-activity they had been going through. Thereafter they were fine,

we started the integration work, and they caught their plane back home on

schedule. When that person got home, over the next 18 months, he wrote nine

small handbooks for people in such crisis situations.

Example 2: Another person phoned up a Spiritual Emergency Network help-line

(in the USA) and asked, “Can you help me. God came and sat in my head last

Christmas.” When asked what she meant by this, she said, “Oh, I just know what

people are thinking about when they come close to me. But my pastor says, ‘I am of

the Devil’; my women’s group think I am a witch; and my husband does not want to

know about any of this stuff.” She was essentially OK within herself with the

symptoms of her Spiritual Emergence process in that she had experienced “God

sitting in her head” and the extra-sensory perception, and these things did not

frighten her, but she was having a ‘Spiritual Emergency’ because the people around

her were uncomfortable with it - so whose crisis was it?

The Surrounding Environment:

Therefore the environment around the person having a Spiritual Emergency is very,

very important.

There is an archetypal story of a psychiatric patient coming out of an

asylum who happens to see a guru, sitting naked under a tree with lots of

people listening to him. He asks the guru, “What are you doing that is

different? When I did that, they locked me up in there.” The guru said, “It

all depends on who you talk to?”

David Lukoff (see Appendix) says: “Not talking to anyone can drive you crazy.” So it

is a matter of finding the right people to talk to, or being in the right place, at the

right time, in order to go through your Spiritual Emergence process successfully.

All this forms part of the surrounding environment.

Location, location:

I first met Grof & Mindell (see Reading List) at a conference on “Spiritual

Emergencies” in Monterey, CA in 1990 where they, or Grof particularly, was

promoting the formation of a crisis centre, a special place – like Esalen8 perhaps –

where you could go to have your Spiritual Emergency. I surprised myself by

disagreeing with him/them, feeling from my own experience, based on my clinical

work in the Findhorn Foundation community, that it is actually better to create or

re-educate the people around the person in crisis, their personal ‘community’,

rather than remove them from their friends and family, in order to have their crisis

properly. And then they have to re-integrate themselves (hopefully the “New Self”)

back into their original ‘community’. It doesn’t make a lot of sense and it costs a lot

less.

Like everything else, there is not really a pre-determined ‘right’ way or ‘wrong’ way

for people to go through their processes. Both models have their valid moments

and I have mentioned this before and I also recommended a “Zen” space for people

earlier on. Many times alcoholics or addicts may need go to a very structured detox.

centre or rehab. unit in order to:

(i) go through their crisis of withdrawal, with its special medical

components, and also

(ii) go through the necessary process of education and re-education, and

also

(iii) have a safe, contained and tested structure with clear sets of rules in

order to ‘contain’ them as they ‘come off’ their addictive substance or

behaviour.

Leaving the safety of that sort of space and coming back into their community often

brings on a secondary crisis. Sometimes ‘crisis centres’ can be used a little bit like

dustbins, especially if the crisis is not handled properly and their family and

friends are not integrated into the process. Therefore I, as a single private

practitioner without the access to or resources of such a crisis centre, tend to want

to work really hard with the person’s family and friends in order to help to change

the environment around that person in a Spiritual Emergency, or to help to create

a supportive community around the person in crisis, before I would even consider

removing them to a different location (NB: Notes on Forming a Crisis Group are in

Section 1).

8 Esalen: www.esalen.org

CRISIS AS SEEN IN TRANSFORMATIONAL TERMS

A friend of mine said to me once that often, if someone in crisis can really open

their eyes, there is always help just there, ready & waiting, help which is actually

perfect for them. This is nearly always true. However this perspective involves a

level of trust in the "reality" of a crisis being a real and significant part of a person's

transformational process, or part of a "Greater Plan", or perhaps a new step in their

"Path," or whatever.

Often it seems quite differently. I have absolutely no wish whatsoever myself (and I

deplore those who do) to try to stick a label of "this is just a difficulty in your

personal Path of Transformation” onto someone: e.g. whose child has just died or

who is experiencing a lot of pain or fear. One client of mine came into therapy after

being, and because of being, ‘busted’ for drugs and it was the eventual rejection of

these drugs (and that lifestyle) that eventually brought about a significant change

for him, his wife, and his child.

It is not just a matter of re-framing the crisis perspective from something negative

towards something more positive. It usually involves a gradual change towards a

whole new set of beliefs - which, if it is to be effective, has to be based more on

actual experience and not just on ‘nice’ New Age or Zen thought forms or

affirmations - however actually true or useful they may be. It is insulting to the

person otherwise, especially if they are in crisis to put out these thought forms or

believe systems, however strongly you may believe in them yourself, especially if

they are not ready for them. However your belief can be helpful too. The fact that

you believe in this process may be very helpful, if not essential, but timing is also

very important, and that is why I am mentioning it here.

You must also allow the person to become different, to transform (if that is what

they are doing), - and this is very, very important – at their own pace and in their

own direction. You must recognize their pain and crisis (which has to be worked

through) and by so doing, perhaps help them to recognize it and fully experience it,

and thus to find and re-formulate their own belief systems if they are to transform

this experience. Often new belief systems are used as an escape from some of these

more painful issues. The fact that, or belief that, “God Is Love”, can help one when

working through the deep pain and issues of abandonment when a marriage

breaks down: but it should not be used to avoid working through these issues.

Traditional priests and ministers are quite well trained in maintaining this sort of

differentiation and helping people through their process – albeit along fairly

traditional paths. Psychotherapy and counselling is also the "new religion" and

psychotherapists are usually sufficiently well trained as well in helping people with

their processes. Psychologists, counsellors, and life coaches are sometimes not

quite so well trained in helping people with their deep emotions and persisting with

them in working through all aspects of these: but maybe this is my bias speaking.

Just remember – it is their transformation, their journey, and they may not know

where they are going with it.

SPIRITUAL TECHNOLOGIES AND TOOLKITS

If you can imagine having the most wonderful super-duper screwdriver with all the

fancy bits and bobs, which is able to undo every possible type of screw, but what

you are actually faced with is a recalcitrant 8mm hexagonal nut, then you have got

a problem, if the screwdriver is all that you have. Similarly, the most

comprehensive spanner set, with all the different sizes of spanners, sockets and

ratchet handles, is useless when dealing with different sizes and types of screws.

To help with these processes, we need a reasonably versatile ‘spiritual’ “toolkit” and

we also need to understand some of the “technologies” of the transformational

process. Most of the “tools” and "technologies" fall into number of simple categories

or precepts:

Feel the experience – Most of us have developed or learnt very good strategies to

avoid feelings, especially painful ones, but also sometimes intimate ones, powerful

ones, aggressive ones etc. Nothing can really happen in your transformational

process unless you allow your feelings - whatever they are – to emerge. Then they

can be looked at, worked with, and possibly changed. But they have to come out

first. So, please, allow yourself to feel. Having done so, as fully as possible, there is

often an element of grace or change that comes afterwards. This can be seen as the

transformational gift: but it can't be searched for. There are also some strong

connections here with some of the neo-Reichian bodywork concepts to do with

helping to release deeply suppressed feelings and so some psychotherapeutic help

may be helpful initially. But, “feeling the experience” is also a moment-to-moment

process as well, and you are going to have to learn how to do it for yourself.

Trust that there is help – Sometimes one feels terribly alone. A friend of mine said

to me once that often if someone in crisis can really open their eyes, there is always

help just there, ready & waiting, which is actually perfect for them. This is

sometimes true. However this perspective or belief system involves a level of trust

in the "reality" of a crisis being part of a person's transformational process, or a

"Greater Plan", or a new step in their "Path", or whatever. Often it seems very

differently: our life is in a mess and it seems as if there is no-one there who cares

or understands. Don’t trust that thought! Ask for help.

You're sometimes better off not alone – In the growth movement we have often

have the privilege, and know the value, of

First Contacts with People in Crisis & Spiritual Emergencies

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