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Psychiatria Danubina, 2010; Vol. 22, No. 3, pp 392–405 Review
© Medicinska naklada - Zagreb, Croatia
MALIGNANT NARCISSISM:
FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore
University of Auckland Faculty of Medical and Health Sciences, Manaaki House Community Mental Health Service
Auckland District Health Board, 15 Pleasant View Road, Panmure, Auckland, New Zealand
received: 1.7.2010; revised: 28.7.2010; accepted: 31.8.2010
SUMMARY
Introduction: Malignant Narcissism has been recognized as a serious condition but it has been largely ignored in psychiatric
literature and research. In order to bring this subject to the attention of mental health professionals, this paper presents a
contemporary synthesis of the biopsychosocial dynamics and recommendations for treatment of Malignant Narcissism.
Methods: We reviewed the literature on Malignant Narcissism which was sparse. It was first described in psychiatry by Otto
Kernberg in 1984. There have been few contributions to the literature since that time. We discovered that the syndrome of Malignant
Narcissism was expressed in fairy tales as a part of the collective unconscious long before it was recognized by psychiatry. We
searched for prominent malignant narcissists in recent history. We reviewed the literature on treatment and developed categories for
family assessment.
Results: Malignant Narcissism is described as a core Narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial behavior, ego-syntonic sadism,
and a paranoid orientation. There is no structured interview or self-report measure that identifies Malignant Narcissism and this
interferes with research, clinical diagnosis and treatment. This paper presents a synthesis of current knowledge about Malignant
Narcissism and proposes a foundation for treatment.
Conclusions: Malignant Narcissism is a severe personality disorder that has devastating consequences for the family and
society. It requires attention within the discipline of psychiatry and the social science community. We recommend treatment in a
therapeutic community and a program of prevention that is focused on psychoeducation, not only in mental health professionals, but
in the wider social community.
Key words: Malignant Narcissism - personality disorders - therapeutic community
* * * * *
INTRODUCTION
Fairy tales allow parents to help children prepare for
the realities of life. Although we imagine leaving
fantasy behind as we grow up, we continue to mix
fantasy with reality throughout life and often deny
reason to hold onto our fantasies (Bettleheim 1981).
Fairy tales arise from folk traditions. Things that are
too dangerous to accept consciously are repressed and
reappear in dreams and fairy tales. Fairy tales take place
in a transitional space between fantasy/magic and
reality. The dangerous becomes less frightening in fairy
tales where good always triumphs over evil (Bettleheim
1981).
As youth we are inducted into society by finding
ourselves reflected in folk images. Initially, we live in a
world saturated with elementary folk images, and later,
we encounter the elementary ideas themselves. Jung
described these elementary ideas as archetypes. We
must struggle over time with life experiences that put us
in touch with good and evil and if development is to be
successful, then, metaphorically, the serpent that
represents the struggle between life and death has to bite
us strongly enough to awaken us to an internal world of
transcendence. We need to die in the world of the ego to
transcend ourselves. However, not everyone can master
this and not every elemental idea is transcended by
society (Campbell 1981).
In the fairy tales of Snow White and Cinderella an
evil stepmother is presented who humiliates and tries to
psychologically and physically kill an innocent
stepchild. She is presented as an aloof, arrogant, cold,
person with high social status and power who is
preoccupied with external beauty and the need to
impress others. She has no remorse for her evil actions.
She is loyal to her biological children whom she treats
with entitlement and projects all her hatred and anger
onto her stepchildren. The world is divided into that
which is hers, which is perfect, and that which is not
hers, which includes bad objects she believes should be
humiliated and destroyed. The father figure is frequently
absent or passive in fairy tales. He is ‘handicapped’ in
his relationship with the stepmother because he has a
child. The cruel woman is not his first choice, but she is
beautiful and powerful. He may be attracted to this
image because he feels inadequate for loosing his first
wife and wants to be seen as a success. His primary
interest is not in protecting his child. In the end of the
fairy tales, the evil stepmother is banished and disap-
pears into the void. She is never punished or asked to
redeem herself. The evil stepmother portrays a classical
malignant narcissist (Moore & Goldner-Vukov 2004).
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
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393
THE PERSONALITY DISORDER OF
MALIGNANT NARCISSISM
The social psychologist Erich Fromm first used the
term “malignant narcissism” (MN) in 1964 describing it
as a severe mental disorder. He called MN “the
quintessence of evil” (Fromm 1964).
Kernberg (1984) introduced the concept of MN to
psychoanalytic literature in 1984. Very little has been
written about MN since his contribution. Kernberg
outlined four features of this syndrome: 1) a typical core
narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), 2) antisocial
behaviour (ASB), 3) ego-syntonic sadism and 4) a deeply
paranoid orientation toward life (Kernberg 1984).
Narcissistic personality disorder
The core features of NPD that are recognized in MN
are a grandiose sense of self-importance, preoccupation
with fantasies of unlimited success, power and
brilliance, a belief in being special or unique, a strong
need for excessive admiration, a sense of entitlement,
interpersonal exploitativeness, a lack of empathy and
prominent envy (APA 2000).
In MN destructive aspects of the self and the
expression of aggression become idealized (Rosenfield,
1971). People with MN give the appearance of being
self-sufficient and successful. Covertly, however, they
are fragile, vulnerable to shame and sensitive to
criticism. Failure to succeed in grandiose efforts results
in prominent mood swings with irritability, rage and
feelings of emptiness. People with MN are driven by an
intense need for recognition. Inwardly, they are deeply
envious of people who have meaningful lives. They are
adaptive, capable of consistent hard work and of
achieving success. However, their work is done
primarily to gain admiration and their intellect is
strikingly shallow. They are often materialistic and
ready to shift their values to gain favour. They are prone
to pathological lying. In the realm of love and sexuality
they are charming, seductive and promiscuous, but
unable to develop deep relationships. When not
involved in narcissistic pursuits, they are cold,
unempathetic, exploitative and indifferent towards
others. Disturbing feelings of inferiority, self-doubt,
boredom, alienation, emptiness and aimlessness
underlie their persona (Kernberg 1984).
MN is situated between NPD and Antisocial
personality disorder (ASP) and is separated from the
later by the capacity for selected loyalties. Malignant
narcissism can be differentiated from ASP by the
capacity of the malignant narcissist to internalize both
aggressive and sadistic features of the pathological
grandiose self. People with ASP have a paranoid stance
against external influences that makes them unwilling to
internalize even the values of aggression. Malignant
Narcissists develop identification with powerful people
and rely on internal sadistic and powerful parental
images (Kernberg 1992).
Antisocial Features
Their antisocial behaviour does not meet DSM IV
criteria for Antisocial personality disorder (ASP). They
are contemptuous of social conventions and show a
passive tendency to lie, steal, and mismanage money.
They may commit burglary, assault or murder and they
may even become leaders of sadistic or terrorist groups.
They are capable of feeling concern and loyalty for
others (Kernberg 1992), but primarily for their disciples
or blind followers. They realize that others have moral
concerns, but they easily rationalize their antisocial
behaviour. They are adept at avoiding detection
(Kernberg 1992, Gunderson & Ronningham 2001).
Ego-Syntonic Sadism
The ego-syntonic sadism of MN is displayed by a
characterologically-anchored aggression. It is expressed
in a conscious ‘ideology’ of aggressive self-affirmation.
Individuals with MN have a tendency to destroy,
symbolically castrate, and dehumanise others. Their
rage is fuelled by the desire for revenge. They may
present with chronic, ego-syntonic suicidal tendencies
but this rarely reflects depression. They become suicidal
during crises and when, as masters of their own fate,
they see suicide as something triumphant (Kernberg
1992).
Paranoid Features
Kernberg (1975) believes the paranoid orientation of
MN may be the basic cause of their self-inflation. The
paranoid tendencies in malignant narcissists reflect their
projection of unresolved hatred onto others whom they
persecute. They have a deep sense of mistrust and view
others as enemies/fools or idols, either devaluing or
idealizing them. They have disorganised superegos and
consequently lack the capacity for remorse, sadness or
self-exploration. They are preoccupied with conspiracy
theories. Their pathological grandiosity is a defense
against paranoid anxiety. Paranoid regression in therapy
can lead to episodes of psychosis (Kernberg 1975).
ETIOLOGICAL FACTORS
Possible etiological factors in the development of
MN include biological, environmental, psychological
and sociocultural factors that contribute to the different
features of MN. Narcissistic personality disorder is
more common among men than women. Approximately
1% of the general population have been found to have
NPD. Antisocial personality disorder has a lifetime
prevalence of 3.5% of the population and males are 7
times more likely to have this condition (Yudofsky
2005). The prevalence of MN is unknown. After
working for many years in a therapeutic community
with people from severely damaged families, the
prevalence of MN in consecutive sample of 100
residents was 20% (Moore & Goldner-Vukov 2005). It
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
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394
is suspected that there are various presentations of MN
as is found with many personality disorders and that the
aggregated prevalence of this disorder is more common
than is generally recognized.
The genetic variance in personality traits in general
is 65%, while 10% is felt to be due to shared
environmental factors and 25% to non-shared
environmental factors including differential parenting
(Reddy 2002).
BIOLOGICAL FACTORS
Biological factors include temperament, genetic
influences, and the neurobiological consequences of
early relational trauma. Brain changes from early
relational trauma are more prominent in the
development of NPD than other biological factors.
Narcissistic personality disorder runs in families but this
does not mean there is genetic transmission. Being
raised as a child of a parent with NPD could lead to the
development of NPD through early relational trauma.
Depression can be found as a coexisting disorder with
NPD. Depression may be genetically caused and this
may result in the development of narcissistic features to
overcompensate for poor self-esteem as part of the
depression. In addition, brain dysfunction may lead a
child to misinterpret parental behavior and experience
apparently normal parenting as neglect (Yudofsky
2005).
There is more research on biological factors in the
development of ASP. There is strong evidence of a
prominent genetic component in ASP. If one monozy-
gotic twin has a criminal background, there is a 66%
chance the other will also have criminal behavior. The
concordance in dizygotic twins is 31%. Environmental
factors have significantly more influence on the
development of ASP in juveniles that on adults. For
adults, genetic influences are much stronger (Yudofsky
2005).
People with ASP are biologically distinct in several
biological areas. They have reduced CNS, peripheral
nervous system and endocrine responses to stress,
particularly to the danger or threat of personal harm.
They have reduced physiological and autonomic arousal
with lower resting heart rate, diminished skin
conductance responses during rest and more theta waves
on electroencephalograms. Functional brain imaging in
people with ASP shows abnormalities in the limbic and
hippocampal areas and reduced activity in the frontal
and temporal lobes. Morality and social conscience are
functions of the frontal and temporal lobes which also
regulate judgment, abstraction, social skills and
executive functions including planning and problem
solving skills. Functional brain imaging has shown that
the regulation of empathic behavior is located in the left
lateral inferior frontal gyrus. Lesions in the right
orbitofrontal region reduce impulse control, impair
judgment and contribute to sociopathic behavior.
Neurotransmitter changes seen in ASP include elevated
levels of the male hormone dehydroepiandrosterone,
reduction of the serotonin metabolite 5-hydroxyindo-
leacetic acid and reduction of the dopamine metabolite
homovanillic acid (Yudofsky 2005).
Paranoid symptoms can occur when the brain is
compromised by medical and psychiatric illnesses. The
left temporal and right parietal lobes are involved in
paranoia. The hereditary and genetic influences of
paranoid features are unknown but when the enzyme
beta-hydroxylase which metabolizes dopamine is low,
this leads to an increase in dopamine and paranoid
psychosis. It is possible that the psychological defense
of paranoid projection is biologically based (Yudofsky
2005).
Temperament
Temperament is defined as the automatic,
associative responses to basic emotional stimuli that
determine habits and skills (Cloninger et al. 1993).
Temperament is moderately heritable and stable
throughout life (Cloninger et al. 1985) and shapes
adaptability, the degree of aggression, affective respon-
ses to frustrations and preferred sensory modalities for
soothing (Akhtar 1992). Temperament accounts for
50% of personality (Cloninger et al. 1993). Tempera-
ment alters the style of attachment (Akhtar 1992).
It is possible to classify individuals into tempera-
ment types based on novelty seeking, harm avoidance,
and reward dependence (Cloninger et al. 1993). ASP is
associated with high novelty seeking, low harm
avoidance and low reward dependence. People with
ASP seek thrills and danger, and show impulsive,
aggressive outwardly directed anger. NPD is associated
with high novelty seeking and high reward dependence.
People with NPD are excitable, quick-tempered, extra-
vagant, attention seeking, self-indulgent, passionate,
insecurely vain, imaginative and ambitious (Cloninger
et al. 1993, Akhtar 1992). In MN there is a combination
of the temperament of NPD and ASP.
Neurocognitive Disturbances
People with personality disorders suffer from subtle
neurocognitive disturbances. They have poor cognitive
performance and have problems with executive
function, learning, abstract thinking and attention. PET
scans show that people with aggression have decreased
metabolism in frontal and temporal lobes (O’Leary &
Cowdry 1994). Neurocognitive disturbances can be
caused by inheritance or developmental trauma.
ENVIRONMENTAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL
FACTORS
In the etiology of MN it is important to take into
consideration early and late relational trauma. Early
relational trauma appears during the first two years of
life and it is strongly connected to a child’s relationship
with primary objects. Less than ‘good enough paren-
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
Psychiatria Danubina, 2010; Vol. 22, No. 3, pp 392–405
395
ting’ (Winnicott 1960) and problems with attachment
are pivotal in the evolution of Cluster B personality
disorders (Torgensen 1994). In the development of MN
there is a strong possibility that parents lack the capacity
for empathy, the ability to contain infantile rage and the
ability to adequately respond to a child’s grandiose-
exhibitionistic mirroring and idealising needs. Parental
figures provide for their children’s physical needs but
neglect their emotional needs. The attitude of parents of
children who will develop MN is controlling and
sadistic. They demand that their children be tough,
tolerate pain, show no emotion and learn to manipulate
others. Parental figures are cold and spiteful but over-
admiring of their children’s talents and charms
(Torgensen 1994). There is no verbal memory for early
relational trauma but the “damaged core” appears in
later personality problems that reflect the early trauma
(Akhtar 2009).
Attachment, Mentalisation, Impaired Right
Brain Development and Resulting Dynamics
Attachment is the first regulator of emotional
experience and arousal. It is believed to have evolved to
ensure the protection of infants. It involves visual,
sensory and auditory interchange as part of a process in
which the right brains of the mother and infant are in
constant unconscious communication. The mother co-
regulates the infant’s developing autonomic nervous
system and this process over time leads to the infant
developing a self-regulating system (Schore 2001).
An attachment control system has been identified
that includes the right orbitofrontal area (which
incorporates cognitive information) and communicates
with other aspects of the brain through cortical and
subcortical connections including the anterior limbic
prefrontal network, the anterior cingulate and the
amygdala. The right orbitofrontal area with the
hypothalamus controls the autonomic and somatic
component of emotional states. The right hemisphere is
the locus of the emotional self and the unconscious
(Schore 2001).
Attachment creates a foundation for mentalisation,
the reflective function or process of interpreting actions
of the self and others as meaningful (Schore 2001).
Mentalisation is a process whereby infants realise that
having a mind mediates their experience in the world.
Mentalisation is linked to the development of the self
and is the core of human social functioning. The
establishment of an attachment system takes place in the
first two years of life when the right hemisphere is
dominant. Attachment alters the experience-dependent
development of the right brain. At the end of two years
the attachment system is complete. No matter what
happens after this, the type of attachment is fixed.
Trauma during the first two years of life damages
right orbitofrontal function impairing social and moral
behaviour that leads to a lack of empathy, impaired
emotional regulation, aggression, problems with
recognition of anger, and problems with mentalisation
(Schore 2001).
In MN right brain impairment results in a
developmental arrest at the stage of the archaic
grandiose self (Kohut 1971), reactive rage and
aggression (Kohut 1971) and identification with the
aggressor (Schore 2001). The grandiose self is a
pathological fusion of 1) special aspects of the self, 2)
the idealised self-image and 3) the ideal object
representation. Chronic envy underlies the grandiose
self and rage incites its formation (Kernberg 1975).
Introjective identification is used to incorporate
desirable aspects of others claimed to belong to the self.
Projective identification is used to externalise
unacceptable aspects of the self and deposit them into
others. Talents and gifts are hypertrophied. Whatever
love is offered is destroyed in order to maintain
superiority over others. Goodness in others provokes
envy and this is defended against by devaluation,
control and avoidance (Kernberg 1975).
Coexisting psychiatric disorders
Narcissistic personality disorder is found in 10% of
people with other psychiatric disorders including
depression, bipolar disorder, alcoholism and other
personality disorders such as borderline and antisocial
personality disorders. Up to 70% of people with ASP
are also diagnosed with alcoholism or substance use
disorders at some point in their lives (Yudofsky 2005).
As Kernberg (1984) suggested, people with NPD,
ASP and MN have borderline personality disor-
ganization. People with these disorders are vulnerable to
regression and suicidal states. The second author
worked in prison settings for 10 years where people
with MN and ASP were obstructed from using their
preferred defense mechanisms. They were often unable
to acquire drugs of abuse and were thwarted in their
attempts to exploit other people as objects to satisfy
their narcissistic needs. In situations like this, these
patients presented with borderline dynamics and were
frequently acutely suicidal.
Family dynamics
In families that produce children with NPD, parental
figures impede the development of mirroring capacities
and empathy (Kohut 1977). Parental figures admire
children as narcissistic extensions, i.e., children are
‘loved’ if they succeed in bringing social affirmation to
the parents. Families producing children with ASP are
self-absorbed, neglectful or cruel and frequently there is
drinking, violence, inconsistent rules, and lack of
recognition of constructive and empathic behaviour
(Akhtar 1992). A low level of maternal care, a high
degree of intrusiveness and a denial of psychological
autonomy are associated with ASP traits in males. The
same factors in paternal care are associated with ASP
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
Psychiatria Danubina, 2010; Vol. 22, No. 3, pp 392–405
396
traits in females (Reddy 2002). Disruption of the family
and parental mental illness are both associated with ASP
(Reddy 2002). Families that produce children with
Paranoid PD have rigid rules, irrational beliefs, mistrust,
hatred toward others, and restricted expression of
emotions. They believe being emotional is a weakness
(Kauffman 1981).
SOCIAL AND CULTURAL DYNAMICS
Personality traits and disorders are recognised
internationally (WHO 1990) but vary according to
cultural differences. In Ethiopia and India 1-3% of
psychiatric outpatients have PD compared to 32% in
Britain (Akhtar 1992). Traditional societies are
protective against PD because social networks buffer for
psychological risks. Modern societies value autonomy,
achievement, external admiration and individualism and
they reward narcissism. Family dysfunction is
commonly associated with community dysfunction,
fragility of social networks and a lack of social norms.
Cultural confusion, migration, poverty, crime,
secularization, and social change all increase emotional
dysregulation, impulsivity, substance abuse and
criminality (Paris 1998).
It is appropriate to consider whether or not modern
society is contributing to the development of MN.
Prominent political, social, religious and cult leaders
have been suspected to be Malignant Narcissists (Storr
1996). People with MN are destructive toward their
families and people surrounding them. In order for
someone with MN to blossom into a figure that
becomes destructive to society on a larger scale, a
supportive milieu is required. Social and cultural
dynamics play a determining role in supporting people
with MN (Reich 1970).
Tyrants have been recognized as malignant
narcissists who come to power in economic and political
situations where they have an opportunity to consolidate
their power. They have severe superego deficits that
over time lead to a loss of reality testing and erratic,
self-destructive behaviors (Glad 2002).
Malignant narcissism in mental health settings
People with MN do not voluntarily come to mental
health service to seek help. They are sometimes referred
to mental health services by the judicial system, the
criminal justice system or children’s protective services.
Children with a parental figure with MN occasionally
come to mental health services by referral from a
medical professional, a teacher or some other person of
authority who recognizes that the child and family need
help.
The children of parental figures with MN may come
to treatment as adults. They suffer from multiple
psychiatric problems such as addictive disorders,
anxiety disorders including PTSD, depression, suici-
dality and personality disorders. These people were
raized in families with parental figure that can be
retrospectively recognized as malignant narcissists.
Several case presentations help elucidate this.
CASE #1
Karen was an outstanding female athlete who was a
national champion and gained international acclaim.
She attended a psychiatric assessment at the request of
her GP because of problems with anxiety. Although
Karen was gifted and successful, she never enjoyed
athletics. She hated every competition in which she
participated. After every success she appeared defeated
and empty. She never believed that she was gifted
athlete, despite international recognition. Karen
described herself as a talented writer, hairdresser, and
painter, although, objectively, her performance in these
areas was below average. She was good looking, but,
she was unhappy with her appearance and arranged to
have facial plastic surgery. Karen was unpredictable and
suffered from mood swings. She was occasionally
suicidal and she was a problem drinker. She would lie
and steal when it was convenient. She was paranoid,
seductive, and promiscuous, and had difficulties in
interpersonal relationships.
Karen was raised by a passive, anxious insecure
mother who loved her but did not protect her from her
father. Her father was a man who came from a low
socio-economic background and was preoccupied with
success. He changed his family name when he was
young because he didn’t think his name sounded
powerful enough. He worked as a manager in a small
company and exaggerated his professional abilities and
successes. He was obsessed with being famous and
respected. He was at times paranoid, always
competitive, and had difficulty in interpersonal
relationships. He lied and misrepresented himself when
it was convenient and he was involved in minor
criminal activities. He presented himself as charming
when he needed something but he had poor boundaries
and this made him intrusive and demanding. He
“blossomed” when he discovered that his daughter was
gifted for athletic activities. At that time Karen was 7 or
8 years old. Her father admired her for her gift, but he
completely denied every other aspect of her existence.
She was required to practise athletic activities every
minute of her life, go for competitions and, of course,
win, earn money and become famous. He used to
compete with Karen and told her that he could have
been a better athlete than she was if he had wanted that.
He spoke about his daughter’s success as it were his
success. When Karen became famous, he went from
being no one to being “Mr. Someone”. When he was
dissatisfied with Karen’s practice or achievement, he
sadistically humiliated her in public. He physically
abused her between competitions. She often played with
bruises on her back and tears in her eyes. The coaches,
teachers, and even the public thought that her father was
‘mad’, but no one did anything to help her. The GP and
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
Psychiatria Danubina, 2010; Vol. 22, No. 3, pp 392–405
397
Karen had to conceal the psychiatric assessment from
her father. Karen refused further treatment. She grew
up, disappeared from the sport’s scene and lead a life
with a lot of problems and suffering.
Comment: Karen’s father was a malignant
narcissist. He had a core narcissistic personality disorder
(NPD). He had a grandiose sense of his own importance
and was preoccupied with his fame. He needed a
continued source of social admiration and exploited his
daughter’s life to satisfy his own needs. He was envious
of his daughter’s gift but lacked any sense of true
empathy for her needs. He had antisocial behaviours,
was physically abusive Karin. It was obvious even to
the public that he was cruel and sadistic and that he
persecuted his daughter.
CASE #2
John was a young man in his forties who was treated
for paranoid schizophrenia and substance abuse. He was
sensitive, intelligent, anxious, depressed and at times
suicidal. He was interested in psychology, art and
philosophy. He had several jobs, but he disliked them
all. He could never establish a relationship with a
woman because he was insecure and impotent. He
desperately wanted to get a job, get married, raise
children and have a decent life. When asked about his
family of origin he reported that his father was a famous
man, almost a legend in his country.
His father was an obsessive, rich, self-centred,
paranoid, and highly competitive man. He was a
celebrated national athlete who took great pleasure in
being famous. John’s father never loved him because
John was physically frail and psychologically unstable.
Despite this, his father continued to have high
expectations of him; he wanted to have a son who
would bring him glory. John’s father was cruel and
humiliating; he physically abused John and went into
foul moods where he would stop communicating with
him for long periods of time. When John developed a
serious mental illness, his father rejected him. He never
visited John in the hospital and refused to pay for his
medication. His father was involved in real estate deals
of questionable integrity. John’s mother was a detached,
frightened woman who was emotionally abused by her
husband. She did everything possible to keep the family
secrets in order to protect her husband’s fame. After a
course of treatment that did not significantly improve
John’s mental health, he took an overdose and ended his
life. His father never bothered to contact the mental
health service.
Comment: John’s father was a malignant narcissist.
He had a core NPD and he treated John like a
narcissistic extension of himself. When John was unable
to fulfil the expectation of gaining glory for his father,
his father devalued him and rejected him. John’s father
showed antisocial behavior in his business negotiations.
He physically abused John and abandoned him when
needed his father’s love the most. His father was
sadistic and projected his unresolved hatred and
aggression onto John and tortured him to the point
where life no longer had meaning for John.
HISTORICAL FIGURES WITH
MALIGNANT NARCISSISM
To investigate the nature of MN and the social
consequences for society, the childhood histories of
three prominent dictators of the 20th Century were
reviewed. Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin and Mao Zedong
committed crimes that are beyond imagination and at
the same time they were creators of the modern world
(Miller 1990, Montefiore 2007, Yang & Halliday 2007).
What is not so well known about these prominent
leaders is the experiences of their childhood and the
possible influence of early and late relational trauma in
the development of their personalities.
Family Histories
Their family histories had striking similarities. Their
mothers lost either 2 or 3 children prior to their births.
Their mothers were religious, strict and idolized and
‘spoiled’ them. They were ruthlessly beaten by their
fathers who tried to control them and obstruct their
development. They hated their fathers and loved their
mother’s initially, but later rejected their mothers as
well. They had a variety of humiliations in their
childhood family life as well as separations with
multiple parental figures. Social and environmental
factors outside the family also shaped their
development. They were unable to maintain normal or
faithful relationships with women (Miller 1990,
Montefiore 2007, Yang & Halliday 2007)
Malignant Narcissists
All three dictators were malignant narcissists. They
had core narcissistic personalities, marked antisocial
behaviours, paranoid and sadistic features. They were
all loyal to selective associates. Their early childhoods
appear to have been disrupted by the unresolved grief of
their mothers. Mothers who loose children usually
idealize and ‘spoil’ the next surviving child as a
substitute for real love. At the same time mothers can
harbour hatred toward the child that survives, especially
when this is the only avenue for the expression of their
unresolved grief. Children born after deceased siblings
are driven to achieve on an extraordinary level in order
to gain the attention of their mothers. If these ‘spoiled’
children had been loved, they would have been able to
establish meaningful loving relationships. None of these
men were capable of this. They were loved as
narcissistic extensions of their parents. The beatings and
cruelty they survived probably led to their paranoia and
antisocial behaviours. Their sadism was most likely due
to harbouring intense feelings of anger, humiliation,
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envy and hatred but being unable to express these
emotions in any way, driving them to an unconscious
level and forcing their expression through projection
and displacement (Miller 1990).
Malignant Narcissism has been recognized in Hitler,
Stalin and Mao as well as other tyrants by other authors
(Glad 2002, Post 1993, Lifton 1968, Pye 1976, Terrill
1980, Li 1994).
TREATMENT
There is little relevant literature to guide the
treatment of people with MN and the discussions in this
section draw from what is known about the treatment of
NPD, ASP, paranoid features and the treatment of
personality disorders in general. People with MN are
usually prominent people who are high achievers who
do not believe they need anyone’s help and they
probably actively avoid mental health professionals.
People around them who make recognize they have
problem but most likely afraid to suggest they seek help.
Their paranoid features cause them to see other people
as bad objects who are either potential threats or
enemies. Their sadistic behaviors create tendencies
toward humiliation and hatred. They likely to see
therapists as bad objects who they would like to
dominate and control in order to avoid their fears of
being persecuted. This pattern becomes an obsessive
mechanism by which they regulate the suppression and
repression of aggression (Kernberg 2004).
Malignant narcissists may come to treatment under
duress from social services or correctional institutions.
They occasionally come to get help for coexisting
mental disorders, possibly at the request of partners or
family members. It is important to understand the
serious coexisting disorders including substance abuse
and dependence problems, depression, bipolar disorder,
anxiety disorders and especially the presentation of
suicidal behaviors in all patients with borderline
personality organization (Marcinko & Vuksan-Cusa
2009). Countertransference reactions are especially
critical to understand with these patients (Marcinko et
al. 2008) and individual, couple and marital therapy is
often required in order to achieve therapeutic progress
(Marcinko & Bilic 2010).
Treatment will be divided in psychopharmaco-
therapy, principles of effective treatment, principles of
therapeutic community with adjunctive psychotherapy
including individual, modified dialectical behavioral
therapy, couple and family therapy.
Principles of Effective Treatment
The principles of effective treatment of MN include
requiring patients to accept responsibility for their
antisocial and sadistic behaviours, expecting patients to
maintain predictable, rational actions and reactions,
insisting on the development of consequential thinking,
social reinforcement of respectful boundaries and
respect for the needs of others, strong confrontation of
unjust and capricious behaviours, recognition of
manipulation with immediate confrontation, conse-
quences for every transgression, not allowing any abuse
to be kept secret and not allowing the use of others as a
source of narcissistic supply. Individual therapy could
never satisfy these requirements. The most effective
treatment for Personality Disorders is a therapeutic
community where an intensive holding and corrective
environment is part of the foundation of treatment. In
the context of a therapeutic community it is possible to
include individual psychotherapy including skill
building with modified dialectical behavioral therapy,
individual, couple, group and family therapy. There may
be circumstances in which a therapist feels comfortable
treating someone with MN individually.
Principles of Therapeutic Community
A therapeutic community uses a behavioural
approach such that behaviour change precedes attitude
change. It also uses a developmental approach that
allows a period of stabilization and sequential psycho-
social changes according to an established hierarchy.
The fundamental values of a therapeutic community are
concern for others, honesty, love, trust and
responsibility. In the therapeutic community the group
is the fundamental vehicle for change both in the
community environment and in group therapy. Peer
pressure breaks down resistance and promotes personal
growth. The community also promotes creativity and
offers a sense of belonging. The therapeutic community
reduces pathological narcissism through corrective
achievements, corrective relationships and corrective
disillusionment (Ronningstam 1989, Dolan & Coid
1993).
Psychopharmacotherapy
Atypical antipsychotics are the preferred treatment
for PD. They improve anger, hostility, irritability,
impulsivity and the cognitive-perceptual abnormalities
that underlie psychosis seen in Personality Disorders.
Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRI’s) reduce
anger, impulsivity, aggression and affective instability.
SSRI’s act like a brake modulating limbic irritability
and hyperarousal as well as improving frontal lobe
function and judgement. Lithium, sodium valproate and
carbamazepine improve mood, stabilize affect and
reduce impulsivity and aggression perhaps by
modulating serotonin pathways. Some people respond
to SSRI alone, and others do better with a combination
of an SSRI and a mood stabiliser. Beta blockers and
central norepinephrine blockers help reduce norepine-
phrine levels that are shown to be elevated with
aggression (Solof 2000, Sievers 2002).
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Psychotherapy
Fifty-two percent of people suffering from
personality disorders achieve remission in 1.3 years of
treatment (Perry & Bond 1999). Effective
psychotherapeutic interventions include confrontation
(for defensive and regressive transference) supportive,
exploratory or expressive therapy and the development
of a strong therapeutic alliance (TA) (Gabbard &
Twemlo 1994). Obstacles to effective treatment include
poor motivation, using defensive ‘invincible armour’ of
power (Clarkin et al. 1999), sadistic injury, superior IQ,
lack of remorse and lack of capacity for attachment.
Positive prognostic factors include the capacity for
loyalty, remnants of genuine concern for others, a sense
of remorse, being gifted or talented in some life skills,
being attractive and have self discipline (Stone 1989).
Modified Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT)
DBT provides individual therapy skills training and
the use of intersession time for application of new skills.
A strong therapeutic alliance (TA) is the most powerful
contingency in therapy. The pre-treatment stage focuses
on commitment, orientation to therapy, and the
therapeutic relationship. The next stage focuses on core
behaviours of MN by confronting therapy-interfering
behaviours and increasing the range of function through
group skills training. The therapy stage a power struggle
with the therapist is expected and success depends on
the TA. The TA is a challenge for narcissistic behaviour
and a container for functional behaviour. Behavioural
chain analysis is used to increase insight. Skills training
includes: mindfulness that enables the experience of
true feelings, distress tolerance focused on radical
acceptance, learning about emotional functioning and
the regulation of feelings and actions, and interpersonal
effectiveness in communication particularly taking into
account other peoples feelings (Linehan et al. 1999).
Individual Psychotherapy
The goal of individual psychotherapy is to develop
insight. Insight is essential for individuals with MN to
recognize that they have a problem and to understand
the unconscious sources of their emotional symptoms
and maladaptive behavior. Constructive change can
only occur when an individual brings into consciousness
the unconscious determinants of painful affects and self-
defeating behaviors. In MN the unconscious conflict is
usually related to repressed feelings toward important
objects associated with deep-seated rage and hatred. The
clinical study of patients with MN usually reveals
unconscious and conscious envy as a major affective
expression of aggression. (Kernberg 2004)
Severe narcissistic personality disorders with overt
borderline functioning have a generalized lack of
impulse control, anxiety tolerance and subliminal
channelling. In these patients the intensity of aggression
rises to a maximum and suicidal behaviors come to the
forefront in certain environmental situations. Successful
management of these patients usually requires careful
assessment and treatment of coexisting disorders
(Marcinko & Vuksan-Cusa 2009), pharmacotherapy,
individual and family therapy (Marcinko & Bilic 2010)
and careful attention to countertransference issues
(Marcinko et al. 2008).
The core of psychotherapeutic interventions in MN
usually center around issues of rage, envy and hatred.
Rage represents the basic affect of aggression as a drive
and rage explains the origins of hatred and envy as well
as angry and irritable moods. The object of hatred is
usually experienced as an object that in some ways
possesses the goodness and values that the malignant
narcissist misses and desires for him or herself.
Reaching this awareness is not possible when pure
hatred is directed at an object perceived as a dangerous,
sadistic enemy. The aim of hatred is to destroy the
source of frustration perceived as sadistically attacking
the self. Envy is a form of hatred of another object who
is experienced as sadistically teasing or withholding
something highly desirable. Malignant narcissists have
had a parental figure who seemed to be a good enough
parent but had an underlying indifference and
narcissistically exploited the patient as a child.
(Kernberg 2004)
Malignant narcissists must take full responsibility
for their treatment and want treatment more than the
therapist for therapy to be successful. Narcissistic
behaviors should be approached with insight-informed
psychotherapy and psychoanalysis which place greater
emphasis on revelation and interpretation of the
unconscious and thoughts and feelings that lead to
unsettling feelings and self-defeating behaviors
(Kernberg 2004).
Transference and Countertransference
In the treatment of patients whose transference is
dominated by hatred, it is essential to establish a
rigorous, flexible and firm frame for the therapeutic
relationship. An effective therapeutic alliance is
required to control life-threatening and treatment-
threatening behaviors. The therapist must experience
him or herself as safe in order to be able to analyse the
deep regression in the transference. Psychotic
transferences should be resolved first. Establishing a
treatment contract for patients who are suicidal or who
are engaged in dangerous behaviors or other types of
destructiveness encourages the expression of hatred in
the transference rather than into alternative channels of
somatization and acting out. Any distortions of verbal
communication and deception must be addressed as
failing to do so encourages more paranoid tendencies.
The patient is likely to experience strong tendencies of
role reversal. This means that the patient unconsciously
identifies in the transference with both the victim and
the victimizer as well as projecting these representations
onto the therapist. The patient is likely to alternate
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between experiencing interactions as a victim and a
victimizer and this paradigm will be repeated again and
again. The therapist must attend to countertransference
issues when faced with the cruelty and sadistic behavior
of the patient. The therapist must be extremely alert to
the core countertransference issues: painful experiences
of being a victim and the temptation to act out strong
aggressive countertransference reactions as the
victimizer. The tendency to avoid analysis of the
patient’s identification with the aggressor and treating
the patient as only a victim facilitates
the projection of the aggressor role outside the
transference. This perpetuates an idealized transference
dissociated from the basic dyad controlled by hatred and
thus perpetuates the patient’s psychopathology. That
patient must be treated as a responsible adult (Kernberg
2004).
Couple Therapy
There are several common patterns in narcissistic
couple relationships. The most common is couples who
blame each other and show cohesiveness despite a
chronic state of relationship stress and symptomatology.
They usually have high levels of impulsivity and
reactivity and tend to alienate their families and isolate
themselves. The level of manipulation in these
relationships is high and it is one of the major focuses of
treatment.
Preoccupied couples are most often high achievers
who are successful in their vocations and in social
circles. External obligations are frequently used as an
excuse for intimacy. The underlying dynamic in these
couples is the inability to develop a nurturing and
intimate relationship. A common manifestation in these
couples is a high level of mutual reactivity. These
individuals have a strong tendency to conceal
inadequacies and project their unresolved emotions onto
their partner. The conflicts are usually covert and
difficult to recognize.
The goal of treatment in narcissist couples is to
reduce reactivity and collusion defenses, to teach
partners to avoid using humiliation, and to enhance
empathy in order to allow growth and change (Sholevar
& Schoweri 2003).
FAMILY THERAPY
In family therapy it is important to work on loving
and valuing children for who they are, promoting
autonomy and self-expression, family members
developing a mutual sense of responsibility and the
promotion of humanistic and spiritual values. The target
of family therapy interventions should be the parental
figures as the malignant narcissistic most likely chooses
a partner who will fit with his or her narcissistic needs.
In families with one member suffering from
malignant narcissism or with both partners having
narcissistic personality it is possible that one of the
children will develop borderline personality disorder.
Their developmental history indicates a pervasive fear
of abandonment, a fear of being alone, and feelings of
emptiness and despair. It is likely that parental figures
who are narcissistic are preoccupied with themselves. A
pathological relationship before the age of 3 years leads
to a poor sense of autonomy. Having had unstable and
inconsistent parenting can mean having repeated trauma
in childhood such that there is a deficient resolution of
symbiosis, a failure of the separation-individuation
process and an inability to form an autonomous ego
(Marcinko & Bilic 2010).
The family life of people with borderline personality
disorder is marked by impulsivity, violence, suicide
attempts, substance abuse and conflictual relationships.
The ultimate goal of family therapy is for family
members to learn the value of negotiated agreements. It
is hoped that family members will learn the
disappointments are supposed to be solved through
meaningful communication and the application of
problem-solving methods. The disturbances in family
relationships can be addressed by concentrating on the
lack of problem-solving skills. The concept of differen-
tiation is highly effective in correcting structural and
boundary deficiencies in these families (Bowen 1978).
Introduction to Family Therapy
The main problem in recognizing the pathology of
MN is that families and the majority of non-
professionals and professionals do not recognize
malignant narcissism. Pathological jealousy, aggression,
hatred, sadism and paranoia should provoke the
knowledgeable mental health professional to seek a
family assessment. Usually there are serious problems
with the children involving criminal activities,
substance abuse, problems at school, poor achievement,
suicidality, or borderline acting out that bring the family
to therapy. Family assessment is very important in cases
of depression, children’s problems such as children who
are allowed to be seen but not heard, suspected domestic
violence, borderline personality disorder, partnership
jealousy and where relatives and friends are aware there
is something wrong in the family. The problem may be
that the family has everything material but no
happiness.
Assessment of Families at Risk of Producing
Members with Personality Disorders
The authors have organized family assessment
around covertly and overtly dysfunctional patterns in
the following categories: ‘families in nice wrappings’,
‘families with dangerous goods’, and ‘families in fragile
packages’.
Families and societies have reciprocal influences on
each other. Overtly and covertly dysfunctional families
are at risk for producing individuals who suffer from
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mental disorders, are destructive towards other
individuals and families, are destructive towards society
and the world, have serious flaws but come to power
with the support of members of society who need a
leader who expresses their repressed hatred and
aggression. Societies on some level support autho-
ritarian and narcissistic families out of a desire for
obedient citizens and the need for competition, greed
and success at any cost. Some societies and religions
tend to promote authoritarianism. The family is the
authoritarian state in miniature to which the child must
adapt. The moral inhibition of a child’s natural sexuality
makes a child afraid, shy, fearful of authority and
freedom, obedient, “good” and docile (Reich 1970).
People raised in authoritarian families promote and
advocate for leaders who ironically are destructive
toward their society and at risk for being racists (Reich
1970). Societies and religions appear to emphasize
family values. However, the values that sometimes
dominate society and religious institutions are greed for
power and wealth. These values undermine family
function and promote dysfunctional families and corrupt
societies. Functional societies promote the importance
of education, health and social services for individuals
and families. The consequences of promoting greed for
power and wealth are reflected in how governments
prioritize expenses for war and aggression and minimize
the importance of education, health and social services
for families.
I. Families in Nice Wrappings:
Narcissistic Family Systems
Families in nice wrappings are narcissistic families.
They are socially well-presented, respected and rarely
come to the attention of social services. Parents are
usually educated, successful and follow conventional
religious and social values. Dysfunctional family
patterns can be recognized only by a psychologically-
minded relatives or friends. These families have both
covert and overt dysfunctionality.
Covertly Dysfunctional Narcissistic Family Systems
Covertly dysfunctional narcissistic families show no
obvious trauma, no mental disorders, substance use
disorders or physical and sexual abuse. The children are
well cared for. They are well fed, nicely dressed,
birthdays are celebrated, the families enjoy holidays,
and the children graduate from good schools. Children
have good manners. They are respectful, pleasant and
are social achievers. We will discuss two categories of
covertly dysfunctional families using archetypes from
Greek mythology: Hera’s narcissistic family system and
Demeter’s narcissistic family system.
Hera’s Covert Narcissistic Family System. The
family system is narcissistic. Parents are absorbed in
self-reflection and are unable to see, hear, or react to
their children’s needs. The parents are emotionally
detached from their children, lack empathy and put
themselves and their needs first. (Pressman & Pressman
1994) The mother resembles the Greek goddess Hera.
She is completely dedicated to her husband and cannot
tolerate anything that threatens her husband’s social or
professional status, ego or peace of mind. The social
status of the family is the most important and children
have to serve that purpose. Attachment is avoidant
(Bowlby 1988) and the family system is disengaged
(Minuchin 1974).
The children of Hera’s Narcissistic Family become
the reflection of their parent’s emotional needs. They
are like a shadow or an Echo from the Myth of
Narcissus. They are unable to succeed in capturing their
parent’s attention or love. They loose the ability to form
their own words and can only repeat the utterances of
others. Echo is a symbol of a reactive personality with
an impaired sense of self and lack of self-knowledge.
Children from these families have a vulnerable core,
caustic anger and hatred masquerading as humor, low
self-esteem, and problems with isolation and intimacy.
They are successful in their careers and are usually
workaholics who have no pleasure or satisfaction in
their profession or private lives. Something is missing.
They cannot understand their feelings or their problems
in interpersonal relationships. These individuals spread
their concealed unhappiness to society. As the Dalai
Lama says, “Hatred and anger are considered to be the
greatest evils because they are the greatest obstacles to
developing compassion and altruism…” (Dalai Lama &
Cutler 2001).
Demeter’s Covert Narcissistic Family System. In
Demeter’s covert narcissistic family the mother is
dominant, protective and controlling. The parents’
relationship is vulnerable. Both partners are disap-
pointed in each other. The mother expected her partner
to be socially successful and the father expected his
partner to be a devoted lover. The relationship only
exists because of children and the social stigma of
divorce. The parents did not gain the education or social
status they desired. They love their children and help
them in difficult times, but the children are mainly seen
as a ‘windows of opportunity’ for the parents to attain
their unfulfilled needs for social and financial success.
The parents mostly neglect children’s need for
autonomy and self-expression.
The children of Demeter’s narcissistic family feel
obliged to fulfil their parents’ dream. They become
achievers but loose their authentic self and have
ambivalent feelings towards authority. The children are
used for parents’ narcissistic needs. The parent’s
relationship is less important, the children’s emotions
are not neglected on a superficial level, but the
children’s need for autonomy is completely dismissed.
When these children reach adulthood, they may seek
psychological help at the urging of their partners or
children who recognize that ‘something is wrong’.
These people have strong family loyalties and it may
take a long time for the individual or therapist to
recognize the emotional trauma in the family of origin.
Attachment is usually avoidant and family system has a
tendency to be enmeshed.
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These children usually have problems with identity,
trust and interpersonal relationships. They are more
interested in materialistic than spiritual values.
Repressed anger is expressed through covert sadism,
jealousy, competitiveness and success at any cost. The
children are prone to be followers and not leaders but
once they attain power, they are greedy, ruthless and
insatiable.
Overtly Dysfunctional Narcissistic Family System
These families are socially privileged, well-off or of
average income, but are perceived as organized and
successful. Religious values are neglected. The father is
dominant. The extended family, family friends and even
public often witness the parents’ ambition and cruelty,
emotional, occasional physical and possibly sexual
abuse. The basic needs of the children are looked after.
The family spends a lot of time together. All the family
dramas happen under the superficial smile and
politeness of family members. The parents are highly
controlling. Family values are organized around the
parents’ needs for social status and success at any
expense.
The children of overtly dysfunctional narcissistic
families are only ‘narcissistic extensions of their
parents’. The children’s emotional needs are neglected.
Parents spend time listening to children’s’ frustrations
but impose their values and ways of solving problems
on their children. If children are not performing
according to the parents’ needs for a socially successful
family, children are ignored, treated with emotional
cruelty, physical abuse and public humiliation. Children
are forced or ‘brain washed’ to be successful in sports,
politics and professional carriers. Their attachment is
avoidant, or anxious ambivalent and the family system
is disengaged or enmeshed.
These children are prone to anger, rivalry,
competition and jealousy, as well as overt hostility,
cynicism, interpersonal problems, alcohol and drug
abuse, identity confusion, and narcissistic and sadistic
personalities. They project and displace their aggression
onto others, exhibit hidden or overt racism and
persecution of others.
II. Families with Dangerous Goods
These families are authoritarian and their children
may become malignant narcissists or show antisocial
behaviors or personalities. These children may become
serial killers or mass murders and even brutal, ruthless
dictators.
Authoritarian Family
The majority of dysfunctional families are
authoritarian. Family members rarely come to the
attention of family therapists because most societies rely
on this kind of family structure. Some cultures advocate
for absolute obedience of children and females.
Individuals from these families come to treatment
through problems of their children, for couples’ therapy
because of dominating, controlling and sadistic partners,
domestic violence and forensic problems. In these
families the parents are always right and they are the
masters of their children forever. Every act of cruelty
for these parents in their words is an expression of love
(Adorno & Frenkel-Brunswik 1950, Miller 1990).
The children of authoritarian families often have
their individual will broken during the first two years of
life when the children have no memory of what
happened and will never be able to blame their parents.
Later the children are prevented from expressing
sadness, anger, or rage and are unable to react to hurt,
humiliation or coercion. These children’s feelings are
repressed, dissociated and remain unsatisfied without
hope for fulfillment. In these families the children are
held responsible for the parents’ anger. Any life
affirming feelings from the children pose a treat to the
autocratic adults. Severity and coldness are promoted as
a good preparation for life (Miller 1990).
These children suffer from antisocial, paranoid and
sadistic personality disorders, substance use disorders,
suicide, crime and mental illness. These individuals
contribute to establishing an authoritarian society that is
characterized by destruction, racism, violence, cultural
intolerance, and crime.
Families of Serial Killers and Mass Murderers.
Some children from authoritarian dysfunctional families
become murders. Their motivation for killing involves
the desire to dominate and control other people. These
people are only occasionally seen by mental health
professionals or family therapists before they commit a
crime. The father is usually physically abusive, absent
or passive. The mother was a victim of abuse and
emotionally abandons her children. She is occasionally
dedicated to religion. The child that becomes a murderer
has a desire for revenge and feels rejected and
humiliated by the family. This child has a killing
instinct towards the father and blames the mother for
not providing love and nurturing. There is a prominent
hatred towards the family (Douglas & Olshaker 1999).
III. Families in a Fragile Package
These families are both covertly and overtly
dysfunctional. The family system is dysfunctional with
disturbed roles, boundaries, communications,
responsibilities and values. One or both of the parents
have a history of trauma or family members who suffer
from psychiatric problems or substance use disorders.
Research has shown that children whose parents suffer
mental illness have higher rates of emotional and
behavioural problems (20-25% likely compared to 10-
20% of general population). There is an increased
incidence of abuse and neglect of children (Farrell et al.
1999, Jablensky 1999, Meadus 2000).
Covertly dysfunctional families rarely come to
therapy voluntarily. Viewed superficially from the
outside these families appear functional and caring but
there is a tension in the parental relationship and the
mother is overly reactive. The children’s problems may
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be recognized by teachers, pediatricians and school
psychologists. These families have ‘secrets and lies’.
The secrets are about abuse, mental illness, suicide,
losses, adoption and illegitimacy. The lies are related to
relationship problems, extramarital affairs, sexual
identity, social and financial problems. The main
problem in the family is insecure attachment where care
and giving interactions are characterized by conflict and
ambivalence. Children’s behavior activates the
unresolved suffering of the parents due to previous
trauma, illness or losses.
Covertly Dysfunctional Family Systems
Covertly Dysfunctional Families are of two types:
A) Role reversed child- abdicating parents and B)
Families with disorganized attachment (Erdman &
Caffery 2003).
Role Reversed Child- Abdicating Parent. In these
families the children’s’ role is to sooth and organize the
distressed parents. The mirroring relationship is
reversed. The children show an extreme sensitivity to
the mother’s mood and this results in compulsive caring
by the children (Erdman & Caffery 2003). The parent’s
subsystem is conflictual. The father is disengaged or
mother is a solo parent or has a mental or addictive
disorder. The family system is enmeshed (Minuchin
1974).
These children as adults suffer Psychosomatic
Disorders and Dependant traits. They are unable to fulfil
their roles as parents or fulfil their potential in
contributing to society (Erdman & Caffery 2003).
Families with Disorganized Attachment. This family
system is associated with traumatic care giving. The
parents are a source of threat and abuse. This sets up
approach-avoidance oscillations. This pattern is seen in
families where the parents suffer from affective
disorders, borderline personality and alcoholism
(Pressman & Pressman 1994). The parents have
experienced trauma such as loss, separation, and abuse.
The traumatized parents are unable to cope with their
children’s needs and distress. The children use extreme
defenses to maintain some sort of internal coherence
including splitting, dissociation, and an excessive need
for control. Splitting is used because of a pervasive fear
of abandonment (Holmes 2001)
These children develop borderline personality
disorder and other mental disorders, including self-
harming behaviours, suicide and substance use
disorders. As adult they are dysfunctional in their
interpersonal relationships, in meeting their expectations
as self sufficient members of society and they may show
criminal behavior.
Overtly Dysfunctional Families
These families have obvious problems that are
recognized through the behaviour of family members.
They are frequently seen by mental health professionals,
social institutions, and the criminal justice system.
Physical, sexual, and emotional abuse is prevalent.
Family members suffer from substance use disorders,
criminal behaviour and serious mental disorders. There
are pervasive socio-economic and cultural problems.
These children develop mental disorders, personality
disorders, substance use disorders, suicide and
psychosis. The consequences for society include
rebellious behaviour, violence, crime, and mental
disorders.
DISCUSSION
There is a small body of historical and theoretical
knowledge about MN but no objective data. An
instrument or structured interview that identifies MN
would be useful. The Diagnostic Interview Schedule for
NPD (DIN) (Gunderson & Ronningham 2001) could be
used in combination with schedules that identify
antisocial, paranoid and sadistic features. This would
require research validation.
The ability to describe and understand the
development and treatment as well as the personal and
family consequences of MN is within the grasp of
psychiatry and needs continued attention and
development. The social consequences of MN are
profound. The role of society in enabling malignant
narcissists as leaders needs to be understood and
addressed. Psychiatry has an important contribution to
make toward this endeavour but it clearly involves other
disciplines in the social sciences including political
science, history, sociology, psychology, anthropology,
and economics.
Societies tend to admire special gifts, power, wealth
and status but are not as concerned about individual
human suffering or individual authenticity. Throughout
history it is aggressive civilizations that survive for the
longest periods of time (Campbell & Moyers 1991).
Children who come from authoritarian families with a
strong, powerful and sadistic parent are at an increased
risk for developing Personality Disorders (Miller 1990).
Social authorities are strong role models for parents.
Power, control, and humiliation of dominants towards
subordinates pervade many social relationships (Miller
1978). Modern society discourages the development of
an anima in males, the empathetic part of the soul that
relates to the psychological needs of others.
Of all the disciplines of medicine, psychiatry is the
most connected to the social dynamics of society. It is
worth considering whether this affiliation is part of why
MN has been so poorly recognized and addressed.
Looking back to the information that comes to us
from the study of fairy tales and elementary ideas we
can see that the evil stepmother resembles not only
family members with MN but also dictators, cult leaders
and other social figures. In the elementary ideas
expressed in these fairy tales we can see the father as a
symbol or representative of society. The father is more
concerned about himself than he is about his child. He
doesn’t love the evil stepmother but forms an alliance
with her because he wants to be seen as powerful. He
Mila Goldner-Vukov & Laurie Jo Moore: MALIGNANT NARCISSISM: FROM FAIRY TALES TO HARSH REALITY
Psychiatria Danubina, 2010; Vol. 22, No. 3, pp 392–405
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doesn’t interfere with the activities of the stepmother
and he doesn’t protect his own child. The step child in
these fairy tales is someone who is different. She
becomes the object of hatred and persecution because
she does not belong to the evil stepmother. The step
child is a symbol of people who are innocent, less
powerful and different in families and society. The evil
stepmother is not punished in theses fairy tales. She is
not held responsible for her actions nor is she asked to
redeem herself. In many ways the fairy tales parallel the
current social approach to MN and the approach of
modern psychiatry. The failure of psychiatry to
undertake further study of MN after Kernberg
introduced the topic in 1984 reflects the same dynamic.
This dynamic suggests that society, including
psychiatry, is not ready to accept or overcome the
elemental ideas represented by the concept of MN. As
Bettleheim suggested (Bettleheim 1981) we mix fantasy
with reality throughout our lives and our vision of
reality continues to be clouded by our emotional needs
and our desire to hold onto to fantasies at the expense of
listening to our rational thoughts.
Suggestions for psychoeducation to promote the
evolution of social consciousness include education and
social support. Education about MN needs to be
provided for all professionals involved in the early care
and education of children. Social pressure and
reinforcement should be provided by the professional
medical, judicial, correctional, therapeutic, educational
and ecumenical community to adopt a position of zero
tolerance to child abuse. Early intervention is essential
for abused children. An accessible, well-established
family support system in the community would be of
tremendous benefit. Government support is essential for
the development and utilization of therapeutic
communities for personality and substance disorders. It
is essential that child protective services, the judicial
system and families understand that people with MN
will not voluntarily cooperate with treatment and must
be coerced. A transformation of the collective
consciousness of society is required to move past the
realm of enchantment with narcissistic values and
passive resistance toward authenticity and
responsibility, respect and compassion for children and
integration of that which is projected onto others.
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Correspondence:
Dr. Mila Goldner-Vukov, MD, PhD
409/78-86 Moore Street
Trinity Beach, Queensland, Australia 4879
E-mail: mila@xtra.co.nz