Improving Relationships by Elevating Positive Illusion and the Underlying Psychological and Neural Mechanisms

Abstract

Romantic relationships are difficult to maintain novel and exciting for long periods of time, and individuals in love are known to engage in a variety of efforts to protect and maintain their romantic relationship. How to protect and maintain these relationships more effectively has, however, plagued people, psychologists, and therapists. Intimate partners typically perceive their relationship and their partners in a positive light or bias, a phenomenon called positive illusion. Interestingly, higher levels of positive illusion between partners have been associated with a decreased risk for relationship dissolution, as well as higher satisfaction, and less conflict or doubt in relationships. These findings indicate that elevating positive illusion amongst romantic partners may be of benefit and improve romantic relationships. In the present article, we discuss solving the paradox of positive illusion. As positive illusion may have relationship-enhancing attributes, we discuss the psychological and neural mechanisms that may underlie positive illusion. By elucidating the mechanisms underlying positive illusion, we shine a spotlight on potential future directions for research that aims to improve positive illusion and thus enhance the satisfaction and longevity of romantic relationships.

Full text

MINI REVIEW
published: 11 January 2019
doi: 10.3389/fnhum.2018.00526
Improving Relationships by Elevating
Positive Illusion and the Underlying
Psychological and Neural
Mechanisms
Hongwen Song1,Yongjun Zhang2,3 ,Lin Zuo4,Xueli Chen4,Gui Cao5,
Federico d’Oleire Uquillas6and Xiaochu Zhang1,3,4,7*
1School of Humanities and Social Science, University of Science and Technology of China, Hefei, China, 2School of Foreign
Languages, Anhui Jianzhu University, Hefei, China, 3Center for Biomedical Engineering, School of Information Science and
Technology, University of Science and Technology of China, Hefei, China, 4Hefei Medical Research Center on Alcohol
Addiction, Anhui Mental Health Center, Hefei, China, 5Institute of Health Science Research, School of Sociology and
Population Studies, Renmin University of China, Beijing, China, 6Department of Neurology, Massachusetts General Hospital,
Harvard Medical School, Boston, MA, United States, 7Academy of Psychology and Behavior, Tianjin Normal University,
Tianjin, China
Edited by:
Feng Kong,
Shaanxi Normal University, China
Reviewed by:
Zhao-xin Wang,
East China Normal University, China
Kai Yuan,
Xidian University, China
*Correspondence:
Xiaochu Zhang
zxcustc@ustc.edu.cn
Received: 05 August 2018
Accepted: 12 December 2018
Published: 11 January 2019
Citation:
Song H, Zhang Y, Zuo L, Chen X,
Cao G, d’Oleire Uquillas F and
Zhang X (2019) Improving
Relationships by Elevating Positive
Illusion and the Underlying
Psychological and Neural
Mechanisms.
Front. Hum. Neurosci. 12:526.
doi: 10.3389/fnhum.2018.00526
Romantic relationships are difficult to maintain novel and exciting for long periods of
time, and individuals in love are known to engage in a variety of efforts to protect and
maintain their romantic relationship. How to protect and maintain these relationships
more effectively has, however, plagued people, psychologists, and therapists. Intimate
partners typically perceive their relationship and their partners in a positive light or
bias, a phenomenon called positive illusion. Interestingly, higher levels of positive
illusion between partners have been associated with a decreased risk for relationship
dissolution, as well as higher satisfaction, and less conflict or doubt in relationships.
These findings indicate that elevating positive illusion amongst romantic partners may be
of benefit and improve romantic relationships. In the present article, we discuss solving
the paradox of positive illusion. As positive illusion may have relationship-enhancing
attributes, we discuss the psychological and neural mechanisms that may underlie
positive illusion. By elucidating the mechanisms underlying positive illusion, we shine a
spotlight on potential future directions for research that aims to improve positive illusion
and thus enhance the satisfaction and longevity of romantic relationships.
Keywords: positive illusion, romantic love, relationships, commitment, relationship satisfaction
INTRODUCTION
As one of the most captivating affective states, romantic love has edified some of the
loftiest achievements of mankind throughout the ages (Bartels and Zeki, 2000). Early
research on love and relationships focused primarily on the description, interpretation,
and development of romantic relationships (Le et al., 2010). In the past 20 years, research
has gradually shifted towards studying the stability of these romantic relationships.
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Song et al. Positive Illusion and the Maintenance of Relationship
Will love fade as time goes by? In the initial stage of love, the
loving partners indubitably hope to spend the rest of their lives
together. However, studies suggest that love may not last forever
(Fisher et al., 2016; Zou et al., 2016). For example, scores from
lovers on the Passionate Love Scale have been found to decrease
over time (Hatfield et al., 2008; McNulty et al., 2017). While many
experience gradual decreases in their perception of romantic
love towards their partners, it may not all be doom and gloom
for everybody. For example, a study conducted by Acevedo
et al. (2012) revealed that individuals in long-term relationships
(marriages lasting an average of 21.4 years) showed similar brain
activation patterns while viewing facial images of their partners
as individuals reporting to have recently fallen in love (length of
time in love about 3–18 months). This begs the question of what
factors influence the maintenance of romantic relationships. Le
et al. (2010) believe that a construct called ‘‘positive illusion’’
is the best predictor for the maintenance of subjective feelings
of romantic love (Cohen’s d:−0.991), in comparison to other
relationship-related variables such as commitment, love, and
satisfaction. This finding highlights that cognitive processing and
biases play a significant role in stay-leave decisions regarding
romantic relationships (Le et al., 2010), and offer a potentially
promising avenue for the study and intervention of romantic
relationship maintenance.
In recent years, researchers have posited that a positive
illusion about their partner may be closely related to relationship
satisfaction and relationship persistence (Miller et al., 2006;
Barelds and Dijkstra, 2011; Abbasi, 2017; Ogolsky et al.,
2017). Positive illusion is usually defined as a tendency to
perceive one’s own relationship as having higher positive
characteristics and lesser negative characteristics than other
people’s relationships (Murray et al., 1996a), or a tendency to
view one’s own romantic partner more favorably than their
partner views themself (Neff and Karney, 2002). Additionally,
a higher positive illusion level during the initial stages of
a relationship may predict a subsequent slower decline in
relationship satisfaction over time, as well as a greater likelihood
of relationship persistence (Murray and Holmes, 1997; Murray
et al., 2011; Finkel et al., 2013; Dijkstra et al., 2014). While
previous studies suggest that an elevated positive illusion
regarding their partner might benefit and improve the length
of romantic relationships, researchers have yet to discover ways
of enhancing this predictive marker of romantic love. In the
present article, we discuss solving the paradox of positive illusion
that may have a relationship-enhancing function. Furthermore,
we discuss the potential psychological and neural mechanisms
behind positive illusion. Based on the discussion regarding the
potential mechanisms that may underlie positive illusion, we
assert several potential directions for future research on this
topic, specifically, how to improve positive illusion in romantic
relationships.
SOLVING THE PARADOX OF POSITIVE
ILLUSION
Social psychology researchers have studied positive illusion
in relationships for decades now, and have debated whether
positive illusion is a key feature that defines the well-being of
an enduring relationship, as well as whether a lack thereof can
leave people vulnerable toward disillusionment and regretful
decision-making (Fletcher, 2015; Abbasi, 2017). While some
argue that positive illusion is crucial for dating and marital
relationship satisfaction (Martz et al., 1998), others view positive
illusion as an unpropitious mental disorder akin to addiction
(Brickman et al., 1987). However, there is significant evidence
supporting the former view. For example, individuals with higher
positive illusions of their relationship enjoy higher relationship
satisfaction, less conflicts and doubts, and decreased risk for
relationship discontinuation (Barelds and Dijkstra, 2009, 2011;
Le et al., 2010; Abbasi, 2017). From an evolutionary perspective,
romantic love is often seen as a commitment mechanism that
promotes the nurture of offspring by encouraging couples
to engage in a substantial investment (Fletcher et al., 2015).
The ultimate realization of long-term love commitments
requires a leap of faith that manifests as positive illusion to
quell doubt and produce a sense of security (Murray and
Holmes, 1997). However, the Darwinian perspective suggests
that mate-selection criteria for any species has evolved based
on natural and sexual selection (Darwin, 1888). According
to this view, human mate-selection must rest on reasonably
accurate judgments about physical attractiveness, and the status
of potential partners (Fletcher, 2015). Thus, these differing
arguments produce a paradox in that individuals commit to
long-term relationships based on both objective and subjective
judgments.
To attempt to reconcile this paradox, researchers have
conducted a series of experiments. Rusbult et al. (2000) for
example, decreased, to some extent, individuals’ positive
illusion about their partner by manipulating the experimental
instructions by which participants were required to describe
their own relationship as honestly and accurately as possible.
Although in the accurate instructions condition, positive illusion
was slightly reduced rather than completely eliminated, this
was the first attempt to separate illusion from reality, and the
first tentative solution to the evolutionary paradox. Positive
illusion, thus, does not seem to be more blind than prescient
(Murray et al., 1996b), and Gagné and Lydon (2004) believe
that one can be both biased (holding positive illusions) and
accurate at the same time, as accuracy and positive illusion may
coexist in people’s evaluations of their relationships. Positive
illusion can provide a constant sense of security, regulate
feelings regarding a relationship, and help maintain faith that
a relationship is worth pursuing (Murray and Holmes, 1999).
On the other hand, accuracy helps avoid future disillusionment
and regretful decision making (Gagné and Lydon, 2004; Fletcher,
2015).
Overall, positive illusion motivates individuals to perceive
their partners or relationships in a realistic positive light. It
influences individuals to interpret the shortcomings of their
partner in a kind and generous manner rather than to directly
ignore those shortcomings. Importantly, people with positive
illusion do not tend to attribute false desirable characteristics
to their partners (Luo et al., 2010). In summary, as time
goes by, positive illusion is associated with greater relationship
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Song et al. Positive Illusion and the Maintenance of Relationship
satisfaction, care, trust, and lasting intimacy—hallmarks of
healthy relationships.
RELATIONSHIP-ENHANCING FUNCTION
OF POSITIVE ILLUSION
Relationships are not all smooth-sailing, and we are often
confronted by a variety of unavoidable issues that constantly
challenge the stability of our relationships. Sometimes we
overcome these issues with an optimistic mentality; while at
other times we confront such challenges in a negative manner.
Compared with a pessimistic mentality, optimism is more
likely to yield beneficial results (Miller and Turnbull, 1986).
As a defined pattern of optimistic belief, how does positive
illusion help confront threats to relationships and address
challenges?
Positive illusion can help with facing inevitable threats
to relationships. Most relationships are inevitably threatened
by conflicts of interest or seductive alternatives, and solving
such problems often requires a departure from one’s own
direct interests. For example, when a partner behaves badly,
accommodation rather than revenge are more conducive to
the stability of the relationship (Rusbult et al., 1991; Van
Lange et al., 1997). Further, when partners’ preferences are
inconsistent, it is beneficial to sacrifice one’s own interests
for the partner’s interests. Overall, positive belief systems
motivate us to find available solutions to dilemmas found
across relationships (Murray et al., 1996a). Such systems
promote persistence, by increasing pro-social motivation, and
facilitating a willingness to investment oneself in a relationship
(Miller et al., 2006; Le et al., 2010). Thus, it is plausible
that positive illusion may serve to enhance the health of
relationships.
Positive illusion may also help sustain faith in relationships
when there is uncertainty or doubt. Even the most idyllic
relationships suffer from difficult periods that evoke feelings of
discontent or suspicion. It is believed, however, that positive
illusion may reduce suspicion or uncertainty from potentially
confounding information (Niehuis et al., 2011).
Positive illusion may also maintain a relationship by
improving self-esteem, and has been shown to be associated with
self-fulfillment. For example, the idealization between partners
can promote self-fulfillment that immunizes intimates against
the detrimental effects of early suspicion and conflict, thereby
enhancing later satisfaction (Murray et al., 1996b; Fletcher, 2015;
Erol and Orth, 2016). From this perspective, individuals that
hold positive beliefs about their relationship will often feel
greater satisfaction about themselves, and this has been shown
to make it more likely for their relationship to persist (Boyes
and Fletcher, 2007; Barelds and Dijkstra, 2009; Erol and Orth,
2014).
In summary, positive illusion has a relationship-enhancing
function that can buffer conflicts and doubts, enhance the
maintenance of relationships, increase the level of relationship
satisfaction through the application of coping mechanisms to
inevitable challenges, and foster an improvement in a partner’s
self-esteem.
PSYCHOLOGICAL MECHANISMS OF
POSITIVE ILLUSION
In previous sections, we discussed the relationship-enhancing
function of positive illusion. For such an important
phenomenon, we will next discuss how it may be generated and
maintained from the perspective of psychological mechanisms.
As to the generation of positive illusion, previous studies have
raised two points of view: (1) Murray et al. (1996a) suggested
that in close relationships, people may project their own virtues
and their ideal partners’ virtues onto their current partners;
and (2) Commitment is a motivator of positive illusion. When
individuals invest a higher level of commitment in their
relationship, they also take a more favorable view towards
their relationship (Gagné and Lydon, 2004). Although some
empirical studies partially support these views, many questions
remain unclear. With regard to the first view, researchers
have used cross-sectional data to study the causal link among
individuals’ self-images, ideals, and the impressions of their
partners (Murray et al., 1996a), and their results suggested that
the impressions of their partners were a mirror of individuals’
self-images and ideals. However, the characteristics of a current
partner may confound that individual’s criteria of their ideal
partner, and thus, measuring the development of positive illusion
via cross-sectional data is quite limited and requires further
longitudinal research. With regard to the second view, Rusbult
et al. (2000) used threatening instructions to manipulate the
level of commitment, in an attempt to study the motivator
of positive illusion. Their results suggested that manipulating
commitment leads to only a partial change rather than a complete
elimination of positive illusion. This result, thus, did not provide
direct evidence in support of a causal link between commitment
and positive illusion. An association between commitment and
positive illusion might fit into a model of cyclical growth
in which variables represented as ‘‘later effects’’ feed back
into and influence ‘‘earlier causes.’’ Therefore, the researchers
ultimately did not seem to agree on how positive illusion
arises, and this requires additional studies to further clarify their
results.
Why does positive illusion persist, even in the face of
conflicting information? Compared to the development of
positive illusion, the maintenance of positive illusion is even
more essential. Indeed, some individuals’ positive perceptions
about their partners do not disappear, but instead, become
more prominent as time goes by Miller et al. (2006).
Researchers have suggested that social comparison includes
dimensional comparison (selectively focusing on advantaged
dimensions of one’s own relationship), downward comparison
(comparing others’ relationships that are worse off), avoidance
of comparison (ignoring information that is detrimental to
one’s own relationship), and the manipulation of surrounding
dimensions (selectively focusing on information that derogate
others’ relationship), all crucial for developing and maintaining
positive illusion (Wood and Taylor, 1991). Furthermore, Murray
et al. (1996a) believed that self-images play an important role in
structuring the images of others, and found that more positive
self-images contribute to the maintenance of positive perceptions
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Song et al. Positive Illusion and the Maintenance of Relationship
of partners. Although the above-mentioned studies have tried to
assess how positive illusion is maintained, thus far, there is still
no empirical research that has been able to study the mechanisms
that underlie the maintenance of positive illusion.
NEURAL MECHANISM OF POSITIVE
ILLUSION
With the advent of magnetic resonance imaging (MRI)
technology, researchers have become increasingly interested
in investigating the underlying neural mechanisms of positive
illusion. Recent functional MRI (fMRI) research has revealed the
following brain regions as being associated with positive illusion
(see Figure 1): (a) the caudate nucleus; (b) the dorsal anterior
cingulate cortex (dACC); (c) the ventral anterior cingulate cortex
(vACC); (d) the orbitofrontal cortex (OFC); (e) the ventrolateral
prefrontal cortical regions (vLPFC); and (f) the dorsal medial
prefrontal cortex (dMPFC; Meyer et al., 2011; Hughes and
Beer, 2012). Interestingly, these areas play important roles in
the processing of reward (the caudate nucleus; Aron et al.,
2005), subjective valuation (OFC; De Martino et al., 2006;
Fellows, 2007), conflict detection (dACC; Botvinick et al., 2004;
Kawamoto et al., 2012), and emotional control (vACC, vLPFC,
and dMPFC; Meyer et al., 2011).
The caudate nucleus is a dopaminergic brain area associated
with goal-directed motivation and reward, and is usually
considered as one of the neurobiological correlates of romantic
love (Aron et al., 2005). Activity found here has been associated
with the perception of a romantic partner (i.e., this region
activates upon looking at a photograph of a romantic partner)
as compared with familiar friends (Bartels and Zeki, 2000; Aron
FIGURE 1 | Brain areas related to positive illusion. This image is an original
schematic diagram, and the brain areas referred to previous studies (Meyer
et al., 2011; Hughes and Beer, 2012). Definitions: dACC, dorsal anterior
cingulate cortex; dMPFC, dorsal medial prefrontal cortex; vLPFC, ventrolateral
prefrontal cortical regions; OFC, the orbitofrontal cortex; vACC, ventral anterior
cingulate cortex.
et al., 2005; Xu et al., 2011). Importantly, the caudate nucleus
is connected to the ventral tegmental area (VTA) and nucleus
accumbens (NAC) by dopaminergic neurons, and is associated
with the processing of love-related reward signals that drive
individuals to approach a romantic love target (Lauwereyns,
2006). It is believed that the activation of the caudate nucleus
lends salience to the positive characteristics of a romantic
partner over negative characteristics or other social comparisons
(Hughes and Beer, 2012).
The dACC has been associated with error detection,
monitoring of conflict, and social exclusion (Botvinick et al.,
2004; Kawamoto et al., 2012). Participants in experiments display
significantly elevated activation of the dACC when experiencing
negative social evaluation and social exclusion (Eisenberger
et al., 2011; Kross et al., 2011). Therefore, a reduction of dACC
activation in response to partner-related negative information
may represent an adaptive response to a partner’s imperfections.
The vACC has been shown to play a key role in
emotion conflict regulation and emotion control (Etkin et al.,
2011). Increased activation of the vACC could enhance
the differentiation of desirable social characteristics between
intimate and non-intimate individuals (Hughes and Beer, 2012).
The OFC has been associated with the encoding of
subjective value and the weighing of information (positive
or negative) in decision-making (De Martino et al., 2006;
Fellows, 2007). Social perception of ordinary individuals (i.e., the
average peer), represents the integration of both desirable and
undesirable information about an evaluation target. In social
comparisons, the positive information about a potential partner
becomes available and is integrated into the target personality
characteristics of a partner (Kunda, 1990; Rusbult et al., 2000).
In theory, the OFC may modulate priority integration of positive
FIGURE 2 | Theoretical schematic diagram of signal processing during
generation of positive illusions.
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Song et al. Positive Illusion and the Maintenance of Relationship
information (Hughes and Beer, 2012). The vLPFC and dMPFC
are part of a brain network responsible for deliberate emotion
regulation (i.e., top-down control of emotional responses;
Ochsner et al., 2009). The activation of the vLPFC and dMPFC
may benefit the suppression of affective responses that help
attract or derogate alternatives (Meyer et al., 2011).
Importantly, these brain areas do not function independently,
but rather interact with one other, a mechanism suggested by
functional connectivity among these areas (i.e., synchronous
activation between these distal brain regions; Cohen et al.,
2005; Turner et al., 2006; Greicius et al., 2007; Zald et al.,
2012; Song et al., 2015). Taken into context, the comparison
between partners and non-close others may be facilitated
and made more prominent by the processing of a partner’s
positive characteristics by the caudate nucleus, while the dACC
suppresses the perception of a partner’s negative features. At the
same time, the vLPFC and dMPFC could be reducing the salience
of attractive alternatives. Subsequently, these brain areas transmit
signals to the vACC that may help differentiate information from
potential partners over non-close others. Finally, as information
is passed onto the OFC, the weighing of positive and negative
information of a partner is redistributed, cementing biased
subjective values (e.g., positive illusion) about the partner (see
Figure 2).
SUMMARY AND FUTURE DIRECTIONS
In this article, we discussed solving the paradox of positive
illusion. We then reviewed how positive illusion can enhance
relationship satisfaction, and longevity. Lastly, we discussed
the psychological and neural mechanisms that may underlie
positive illusion. While these discussions have deepened our
understanding of positive illusion, some questions still remain
unresolved.
First, although previous studies have discussed the
development of positive illusion, researchers have yet not
reached a consensus on this process. As previous studies
were unable to provide direct causal evidence, future studies
using longitudinal data and strict laboratory experimental
manipulations are in need to help elucidate this process.
Second, a better understanding of how individuals maintain
positive illusions about their partners when confronted with
information inconsistent with previous impressions is essential,
as it may help explain the apparent contradiction between
reinforcement and environmental fitness (e.g., the evolutionary
paradox). Furthermore, this avenue of research may help design
interventions that improve positive illusion, as well as help
inform future experiment designs that simulate the maintenance
of positive illusion and thus reveal potential mechanisms
underlying positive illusion maintenance.
Third, while preliminary studies on the neural mechanisms
of positive illusion indicate brain activation patterns associated
with positive illusion toward romantic partners, studies have yet
to explore the neural mechanisms associated with the generation
and maintenance of positive illusion. In particular, fMRI
experiments investigating how individuals maintain positive
illusions of their partner when confronted with information
that is inconsistent with previous impressions, remain to be
performed. Even further, based on previous knowledge on
associated brain areas and networks involved in positive illusion,
future research may wish to use non-invasive neural intervention
techniques, such as transcranial direct current stimulation
(tDCS) or transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), to intervene
in the generation and maintenance of positive perceptions
amongst romantic partners. These techniques manipulate signal
processing and brain mechanisms, and are thus elegant ways of
investigating causal associations regarding positive illusion and
other factors of relationships such as relationship satisfaction,
commitment, and conflict resolution.
AUTHOR CONTRIBUTIONS
HS and XZ conceived and wrote the frame design. HS wrote
the manuscript. HS, XZ, YZ, LZ, FU, XC and GC revised the
manuscript, and all authors contributed to the final version.
FUNDING
This work was supported by grants from The National Key Basic
Research Program (2016YFA0400900 and 2018YFC0831101),
The National Natural Science Foundation of China (31471071,
31771221, 61773360, and 71874170), The Fundamental Research
Funds for the Central Universities of China.
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Conflict of Interest Statement: The authors declare that the research was
conducted in the absence of any commercial or financial relationships that could
be construed as a potential conflict of interest.
Copyright © 2019 Song, Zhang, Zuo, Chen, Cao, d’Oleire Uquillas and Zhang.
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