No full-text available
To read the full-text of this research,
you can request a copy directly from the authors.
The Mismeasure of Love: How Self-Doubt Contaminates Relationship Beliefs
Abstract
The authors argue that individuals with more negative models of self are involved in less satisfying relationships because they have difficulty believing that they are loved by good partners. Dating and married couples completed measures of self-models, perceptions of the partner’s love, perceptions of the partner, and relationship well-being. The results revealed that individuals troubled by self-doubt underestimated the strength of their partners’ love. Such unwarranted insecurities predicted less positive perceptions of their partners. In conjunction, feeling less loved by a less-valuable partner predicted less satisfaction and less optimism for the future than the partner’s feelings of love and commitment warranted. A dependency regulation model is described, where feeling loved by a good, responsive partner is thought to represent a sense of felt security that diminishes the risks of interdependence and promotes closeness.
... The model suggests that the individual's self-esteem predicts this choice. As mentioned above, the defense mechanisms of low self-esteem individuals are exacerbated by previous hurtful experiences which makes them doubt the positive regard of their partner and orientate them toward self-protective goals (Murray et al., 2001). Low self-esteem individuals will have a tendency, therefore, to adopt behaviors such as withdrawal instead of disclosure, which in turn erodes the quality of the relationship (Murray et al., 2002). ...
... The risk regulation model suggests that self-esteem affects individuals' perception of their partner and relationship (Murray et al, 2001). While high self-esteem individuals tend to see things through a more positive lens, low self-esteem individuals, on the other hand, tend to focus on the negative aspects. ...
... Noticeably, this is consistent with previous findings on the general population (Erol & Orth, 2017) Another contribution of the present article was to evaluate the effects of selfesteem on coparenting quality. On a theoretical perspective, as for the romantic relationship, parents with low self-esteem might doubt the positive regard of their partner and child (Murray et al, 2001). Consequently, they may be more sensitive to criticism and/or to the child's bad mood, thereby enhancing the risks of adopting unadjusted coparental behaviors and hindering the use of positive coparental behaviors. ...
Objective
This study investigated the actor and partner effects of self‐esteem on the quality of the parental couple relationships: the romantic relationship and the coparental relationship. The mediating role of romantic quality also was considered.
Background
Previous findings suggest that self‐esteem affects the quality of the romantic relationship. Yet few studies have focused on self‐esteem in the parental couple or explored self‐esteem related to the coparental relationship, both of which play a significant role in the nature of the family unit.
Method
Using data from two independent samples (including 2,549 couples), actor–partner interdependence models were tested to analyze the effects of self‐esteem on both relationships of the parental couple.
Results
Parents with high self‐esteem reported higher romantic quality, as did their partner. Self‐esteem also showed actor and partner effects on negative coparenting. Accordingly, parents with high self‐esteem reported fewer conflicts about the child and fewer undermining behaviors. In contrast, the link between self‐esteem and positive coparenting received little support. However, when mothers had high self‐esteem, they engaged more frequently in positive coparental behaviors, such as including the father. Finally, romantic relationship quality mediated the actor and partner effects of self‐esteem on negative coparenting.
Conclusion
Having high self‐esteem appears to be a couple resource with beneficial effects for both parents.
Implications
Improving parents' self‐esteem could be an important gateway for enhancing the functioning of families with romantic and coparental difficulties.
... For example, expecting high responsiveness from a romantic partner might be linked to perceptions of responsiveness and relationship quality above and beyond the objective responsiveness the partner actually exhibited. Or, framed more negatively, expecting rejection from a partner relates to more negative perceptions and relationship quality, independent of the partner's true feelings or behavior (e.g., Cameron et al., 2009;Murray et al., 2001Murray et al., , 2006Rodriguez et al., 2019). ...
... That is, particularly for those with low relationship expectations, it may be more costly to overperceive a partner's positive behaviors, and be lulled into a false sense of security in one's relationship. By underperceiving a partner's positive behaviors, those with low expectations, much like those with low self-esteem (Fletcher & Kerr, 2010;Murray et al., 2001) can protect themselves and distance themselves from an unsatisfying or risky relationship. ...
People who are happy with their romantic relationships report that their partners are particularly effective at meeting their everyday relational needs. However, the literature invites competing predictions about how people arrive at those evaluations. In pilot research, we validated a scale of concrete, specific relationship behaviors that can be performed by a romantic partner day-to-day. In Study 1, cross-lagged panel models examined how expectations of positive behaviors, perceptions of positive behaviors, and relationship quality predict changes in one another from week to week. People who expected more positive behaviors in turn perceived more positive behaviors from their partners 1 week later. Key effects extended to negative relationship behaviors (Study 2). In Study 3, the same pattern emerged in a dyadic sample, with expected behaviors predicting changes in perceived behaviors independent of the partner's own reports. Truth and bias analyses revealed that people with lower expectations had more negatively biased perceptions of their partners' behaviors, whereas high expectations were associated with better accuracy. We obtained these results in the context of specific, verifiable behaviors reported on over relatively short periods, underscoring how powerfully people's everyday relationship perceptions may be shaped by their more global perceptions. (PsycInfo Database Record (c) 2022 APA, all rights reserved).
... So I think that quite affected our relationship" (Female, 38 years). Continuous comparison of oneself with another person could be a sign of low self-esteem and numerous studies have linked low self-esteem with marital distress and marital dissolution (Kinnunen & Pulkkinen, 2003;Murray et al., 2001). Individuals with more negative self-belief have a less satisfying relationship and face difficulty trusting their partners. ...
... Individuals with more negative self-belief have a less satisfying relationship and face difficulty trusting their partners. It also affects their perception of their partner's love and relationship well-being and makes them feel more insecure in their relationship (Murray et al., 2001). ...
The present study explores the reason for conflict that Indian middle-class married couples face and the ways they manage those conflicts. For the purpose, 30 long-term married couples (M age = 44.70 years; M marriage years = 19.48) were interviewed. Thematic analysis was carried out using Quirkos software. The reliability of the codes was checked by two independent raters and ICR was found to be 0.902. The analysis shows that disputes related to daily problems, finances, children, and in-laws, are more common in Indian middle-class couples. Unlike Western studies, Indian middle-class couples are not very vocal about problems related to intimacy and personal needs. Moreover, results show that the conflict management style of Indian middle-class couples is more relationship and partner-centric, that is, it is focused on benefiting their marital stability overall. We found three different but interdependent conflict management approaches-problem-solving, prioritizing partner, and harmonizing relationship. The results of the study show that some conflicts, as well as conflict management strategies, are more specific to Indian married couples, which probably gives longevity to Indian marriages. The findings can also help to guide and encourage couples facing problems in their marriage, especially young couples to choose an effective approach to solve a conflict.
... So I think that quite affected our relationship" (Female, 38 years). Continuous comparison of oneself with another person could be a sign of low self-esteem and numerous studies have linked low self-esteem with marital distress and marital dissolution (Kinnunen & Pulkkinen, 2003;Murray et al., 2001). Individuals with more negative self-belief have a less satisfying relationship and face difficulty trusting their partners. ...
... Individuals with more negative self-belief have a less satisfying relationship and face difficulty trusting their partners. It also affects their perception of their partner's love and relationship well-being and makes them feel more insecure in their relationship (Murray et al., 2001). ...
The present study explores the reason for conflict that Indian middle-class married couples face and the ways they manage those conflicts. For the purpose, 30 long-term married couples (M age = 44.70 years; M marriage years = 19.48) were interviewed. Thematic analysis was carried out using Quirkos software. The reliability of the codes was checked by two independent raters and ICR was found to be 0.902. The analysis shows that disputes related to daily problems, finances, children, and in-laws, are more common in Indian middle-class couples. Unlike Western studies, Indian middle-class couples are not very vocal about problems related to intimacy and personal needs. Moreover, results show that the conflict management style of Indian middle-class couples is more relationship and partner-centric, that is, it is focused on benefiting their marital stability overall. We found three different but interdependent conflict management approaches—problem-solving, prioritizing partner, and harmonizing relationship. The results of the study show that some conflicts, as well as conflict management strategies, are more specific to Indian married couples, which probably gives longevity to Indian marriages. The findings can also help to guide and encourage couples facing problems in their marriage, especially young couples to choose an effective approach to solve a conflict.
... This overtime progresses into negative thoughts or opinions about their inability to fit into the class of one's peers, become rejected or uncertain about activities around them including their relationships. Also, low-self-esteem individuals experience relationship realities that are detrimental to their security (Murray et al. 2001). Velotti et al. (2016) explain that anxiety and insecurity may be due to the presence of low self-esteem; however, this poses a great threat to relationship stability and satisfaction. ...
... For example, social allergy which may refer to feelings of disgust for repeated behaviors deemed annoying (Cunningham et al. 2005;Lasisi et al. 2020a, b); inability to react to problems constructively (Rusbult et al. 1986); topic avoidance (Caughlin and Golish 2002), lack of communication (Sabatelli 1988); alienation (Rusbult and Zembrodt 1983) are some of the factors that may cause dissatisfaction in romantic relationships. Murray et al. (2001) argue that individuals plagued by feelings of low self-esteem may experience dissatisfaction in their relationships due to their level of sensitivity to issues and their feeling of insecurity. Thus, having low self-esteem hinders relationship quality (Trombello et al. 2015). ...
This research investigated the extent to which low self-esteem, relationship dissatisfaction, and relationship insecurity exacerbate intention to break up in romantic relationships. Results from the study indicated that low self-esteem contributed to individuals having negative thoughts, emotions, and evaluation of their romantic relationships. Quite importantly, findings in the study showed that insecurity and relationship dissatisfaction partially mediate the relationship between low self-esteem and intention to break up in romantic relationships. Findings also indicated that due to low self-esteem, individuals may begin to doubt the level of trust, love and care accorded them by their romantic partners.
... For example, LSEs believe they are less liked and less popular than higher self-esteem individuals (HSEs) believe, but peer evaluations show no self-esteem differences (see Baumeister, Campbell, Krueger, & Vohs, 2003, for a review). LSEs also believe that their romantic partners love them less than their partners actually do (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). Most relevant to the present investigation, LSEs have more negative reactions than do HSEs to the very same hypothetical messages of support (Marigold et al., 2014). ...
... In fact, we suspect LSEs do indeed have somewhat negatively biased views of the support they receive. In general, LSEs underestimate how much other people like or love them (Baumeister et al., 2003;Murray et al., 2001). They are less inclined than HSEs to read signs of acceptance in the very same behavior from other people (Cameron, Stinson, Gaetz, & Balchen, 2010). ...
Delivering responsive support to others is challenging. We hypothesize that this challenge is especially great when support recipients are overly pessimistic and resistant to others’ attempts to regulate their mood, as is the case with low self-esteem people (LSEs). Across four studies, we show that LSE recipients perceive support as less responsive than high self-esteem (HSE) recipients do both on a daily basis (Study 1), and for past events (Study 2). Providers confirm that they tend to give less responsive support to LSEs even when they perceive them to be equally distressed as HSEs (Study 3), and that they find it more difficult to support a hypothetical LSE person than a HSE person in the same circumstances (Study 4).
... When anticipating negative feedback, people with lower SE may worry about learning where they fall short, or feel concerned that rejection is coming (e.g., Murray et al., 2006). When anticipating positive feedback, these individuals may feel anxious that there are going to be new standards that they have to live up to, or that the stage will be set for embarrassment or disappointment if it turns out that they interpreted the feedback in overly positive ways (e.g., Cameron, Stinson, Gaetz, & Balchen, 2010;Collins & Feeney, 2004;Collins, Ford, Guichard, & Allard, 2006;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). According to this risk-regulation perspective, people with lower SE may anticipate both positive and negative partner feedback in anxiety-provoking ways. ...
... In Studies 2a and 2b, anticipatory anxiety mediated the relationship between self-esteem and desire for feedback, and this pattern was the same in both the positive feedback and negative feedback conditions Studies 2a and 2b further showed that people with lower SE anticipated feeling anxious receiving both negative feedback in the weaknesses condition and positive feedback in the strengths condition. This is relatively consistent with the risk-regulation model (rather than self-verification theory) which suggests that both types of feedback may threaten to heighten dependence on a partner and thus feel risky for people who doubt their self-worth, such as those with lower SE (e.g., Cameron et al., 2010;Collins et al., 2006;Collins & Feeney, 2004;Murray et al., 2001;Murray et al., 2006). ...
We hypothesized that people with lower self‐esteem (SE) may perceive feedback from romantic partners in threatening ways and display maladaptive reactions during these events. Although prior research suggests that SE is mostly unrelated to emotional reactions to partner feedback, we predicted that differences in anxious emotion exist, but emerge before the feedback is delivered, at anticipation. We evaluated these predictions through a series of studies in which participants received feedback from ongoing and ostensible dating partners. As in prior research, SE was unrelated to anxiety at feedback delivery. In contrast, and consistent with predictions, participants with lower SE anticipated feeling more anxious when receiving positive and negative feedback. These results are discussed in the context of broader relationship dynamics.
... In the intervening years, selfesteem has been found to be associated with many interpersonal outcomes, including those concerning romantic relationship functioning (see Zeigler-Hill, 2013, for a review). For example, individuals with low self-esteem report negative evaluations of their romantic partners and their relationships (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). Low self-esteem individuals react to threats to their romantic relationship in a manner that may contribute to its dissolution (e.g., derogation of one's partner, assuming the affection of one's partner is waning; Murray, Rose, Bellavia, Holmes, & Kusche, 2002). ...
... Views of the self sometimes become intertwined with views of the relationship, particularly for individuals with low self-esteem. Specifically, individuals with low self-esteem typically report more negative evaluations of their partner, ignoring the high levels of regard their partners may hold for them (Murray et al., 1998;Murray et al., 2001). Individuals with low self-esteem view their relationships through the lens of their own self-evaluations. ...
Relationship‐contingent self‐esteem (RCSE) refers to when feelings of self‐worth are derived from romantic relationships. RCSE influences views of the self and the functioning of romantic relationships. The relationship between RCSE and mate retention behaviors was examined across three studies. Study 1 examined whether self‐esteem level and RCSE predicted mate retention behaviors. Studies 2 and 3 examined whether self‐esteem level and RCSE predicted mate retention behaviors following manipulations of threat to the relationship. Individuals with high RCSE were more likely to engage in benefit‐provisioning mate retention behaviors, particularly following certain threats. RCSE was also associated with cost‐inflicting mate retention behaviors, but these associations were inconsistent.
... The most viable alternative explanation is that people care about their partner's dependence not for the sake of the partner, but for the sake of the self. According to risk regulation theory, a highly dependent partner is a more desirable partner because one can feel more confident about their acceptance and positive regard (e.g., Murray, Bellavia, Rose, & Griffin, 2003;Murray, Holmes, & Griffin, 2000;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). Thus, people may be less likely to break up with a highly dependent romantic partner not because they are concerned about their partner's needs, but because the partner's dependence helps to satisfy their own need to feel accepted and secure within the relationship. ...
... 2008; Murray et al., 2001Murray et al., , 2003. Based on this work, a person who chooses to maintain an unfulfilling relationship may actually be doing their partner a disservice, as the partner may pick up on the fact that the decision maker does not genuinely want to be with them and consequently feel worse about themselves. ...
The decision to end a romantic relationship can have a life-changing impact on the partner as well as the self. Research on close relationships has thus far focused on self-interested reasons why people choose to stay in their relationship versus leave. However, a growing body of research on decision-making and prosociality shows that when people make decisions that impact others, they take those others’ feelings and perspectives into consideration. In the present research, we tested the prediction that people make stay/leave decisions prosocially, such that consideration for their romantic partner’s feelings can discourage people from ending their relationships. In Study 1, a total of 1,348 participants in romantic relationships were tracked over a 10-week period. Study 2 was a preregistered replication and extension of Study 1, in which 500 participants contemplating a breakup were followed over a 2-month period. Both studies showed that the more dependent people believed their partner was on the relationship, the less likely they were to initiate a breakup. These findings held above and beyond a variety of self-focused variables (e.g., investment model components; Rusbult, Martz, & Agnew, 1998). These results suggest that people can be motivated to stay in relatively unfulfilling relationships for the sake of their romantic partner.
... Moreover, people with greater attachment anxiety tend to have biased interpersonal perceptions, such that they tend to make more negative attributions about others' behavior (e.g., Collins, 1996;Collins, Ford, Guichard, & Allard, 2006;Gallo & Smith, 2001), and over-perceive conflict in relationships ( Campbell et al., 2005). Individuals with more negative models of the self (a hallmark of attachment anxiety) have been found to perceive less love and commitment from their partner, compared to those with more positive self-views ( Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). While these findings are from research examining romantic relationships, it would seem that such perceptual tendencies may reflect more general perceptual biases, and that these biases, in addition to sensitivity to and hypervigilance of rejection, may leave people with greater attachment anxiety more likely to feel that they are a burden to other people. ...
... Indeed, in the main analyses, we found that self-compassion, perceived belonging, and perceived burdensomeness all mediated the association between attachment anxiety and depressive symptoms. As a consequence of their self-criticism, those with greater attachment anxiety may be less likely to be compassionate toward themselves ( Joeng & Turner, 2015), and as a consequence of their hypervigilance of disapproval and rejection and their tendency to perceive more negative feelings and behaviors on the part of others (e.g., Collins, 1996;Collins et al., 2006;Murray et al., 2001), people with greater attachment anxiety may be more likely to perceive that they do not have people who care about them and that they are a burden to others. With respect to attachment avoidance, there were no significant direct effects on depressive symptoms. ...
Depression is a widespread psychological issue. Research suggests that attachment theory provides a useful lens through which to understand the occurrence of depression, as attachment anxiety and attachment avoidance is associated with greater reports of depression. However, less is known about how attachmentmotivated perceptions and cognitions relate to depression. In the current study, we examined self-compassion, and perceptions of belonging and burdensomeness as potential mediators of the association between depression and attachment anxiety and avoidance, using a sample (N = 370) of students from a large southern metropolitan university. Results suggested that self-compassion, and perceived belonging and burdensomeness, mediated the association between attachment anxiety and depression. Those with greater attachment anxiety reported less self-compassion, feeling less belonging, and more burdensomeness. These factors were associated with increased depressive symptoms. With respect to attachment avoidance, only belonging served as a mediator, such that those with greater attachment avoidance reported feeling less belonging, and this related to feeling more depressive symptoms. An alternative model is also presented and discussed. These results suggest potential attachment-motivated perceptions and cognitions that may be addressed in clinical settings in an effort to minimize depressive symptoms.
... In support of this conceptualization, extant research has demonstrated that actions on the part of the partner may heighten feelings of dependence and trigger people with lower SE to respond in self-protective ways. Surprisingly, even partners' positive actions, including their expressions of affection, have the potential to catalyze these reactions (e.g., Cameron, Stinson, Gaetz, & Balchen, 2010;Collins & Feeney, 2004;Collins, Ford, Guichard, & Allard, 2006;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). This is because people with lower SE seem to worry that they might feel embarrassed if they are wrong about the meaning or significance of their partners' affection or that allowing themselves to enjoy their partners' affection too much might make a future breakup even more hurtful. ...
... To mitigate feelings of dependence on their partner and maintain self-protection during these circumstances, people with lower SE have been shown to downplay their partners' affection. For example, they perceive less acceptance from potential dating partners (Cameron et al., 2010) and even underestimate how much their actual romantic partners love them (Murray et al., 2001). Relatedly, people with insecure attachment (a similar relationship vulnerability) see their partners as less supportive (Collins & Feeney, 2004) and are less likely to endorse relationship-enhancing attributions for their partners' positive behaviors . ...
Although expressing affection is an important way to connect to a romantic partner, it also involves putting yourself on the line—revealing dependence on your partner. Extending the risk-regulation model, we hypothesized that individuals with lower self-esteem (SE), who are concerned about vulnerability in relationships, experience less rewarding reactions to expressing affection, and believe that their partners respond less positively to receiving affection. We assessed these predictions across two studies that measured retrospective reports, reactions to an in vivo exchange and responses in daily life. We found that participants with lower SE expressed less affection and experienced less positive emotional, cognitive, and physiological reactions when doing so. Participants with lower SE believed that their partners derived fewer benefits from their affection despite that their partners experienced normative boosts in positive emotion and relationship satisfaction during these exchanges. The consequences of these findings for relationship functioning and SE are discussed.
... Social surrogates can be important for social connections because research on close relationships has found that people who need the benefits of close relationships the most-those who are psychologically vulnerable and at risk of the negative effects of isolation and rejection-are often the least able to obtain the benefits of social support and interaction (e.g., Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001;Murray, Holmes, MacDonald, & Ellsworth, 1998). At those times social surrogates may be especially helpful because they offer the social benefits of real relationships with much lower risks of rejection. ...
... Furthermore, the literature suggests that those who are most psychologically vulnerable not only derive fewer benefits from social activities and interactions, but are also made more insecure by their bonds (Murray et al., 2001). Thus, it is possible that, among individuals with PTSD, efforts to engage with social surrogates may lead not to comfort, but ironically, to an even greater sense of separation and distance (Hypothesis 3). ...
Traumatic events bring an increased need for social connection but paradoxically can make relationships more difficult. The current research examines the unique role social surrogates such as favorite TV shows, books, and celebrities may play in fulfilling the social needs of people who have experienced trauma. Across two studies we predicted and found that experiencing traumatic events is associated with higher interest in using social surrogates. Furthermore, individuals who have experienced trauma without developing PTSD are able to effectively use social surrogates to combat social isolation. However, perhaps because PTSD symptoms often are associated with impaired social functioning, those with PTSD actually feel worse after social surrogate use. Implications for trauma, PTSD, social surrogates, and social self research are discussed.
... The level of self-esteem is of great importance in interpersonal contacts and romantic relationships. Murray et al. (2001) indicated that people with low self-esteem evaluate their partners worse, as well as show lower levels of satisfaction and optimism regarding the future of their relationship. In addition, people with low self-esteem are sensitive to rejection, which causes a tendency to distance themselves from their partner (Murray et al., 2015). ...
There are many schools of couple therapy, but none has emerged yet that would clearly dominate the rest. Therefore, it is extremely important to constantly search for new therapeutic practices and verify them in empirical research. The purpose of this study was to check the link between women’s self-esteem and their satisfaction in a relationship and well-being. Attempts have also been made to verify if there is a correlation between relationship satisfaction and well-being, and with the components of love: intimacy, passion and commitment (IPC). There were 116 women, aged 19 to 45, in a heterosexual, romantic relationship who participated in the study. A self-developed questionnaire was used to identify the phases of the relationship, as well as Polish adaptations of tools measuring self-esteem, life and relationship satisfaction. The results indicate a positive correlation between the level of women's self-esteem and their well-being (strong) and relationship satisfaction (moderate). Results confirming a positive correlation between women’s relationship and life satisfaction and strong positive correlations between love components and relationship satisfaction were also obtained. Moderate correlations between self-esteem and its subscales were also established: self-liking and a self-competence with intimacy. There was also a positive correlation of self-acceptance with the sum of the components of love as well as of passion and intimacy with well-being. Additionally, a positive relationship was found between self-esteem and self-acceptance subscale and life satisfaction. The data from regression analysis showed that the predictors of life satisfaction are self-esteem, relationship satisfaction and the sum of the love components. The results of this study contribute to research on close relationships, as well as to the therapeutic practice of couples. They can also have a practical dimension for individual psychological or therapeutic help. There is a chance that by developing self-esteem, as well as intimacy and passion in a client’s relationship, the therapist will not only enable her to increase satisfaction with the relationship, but also with life.
... For example, individuals with high self-esteem showed more relationship enhancing behaviors (Orth et al., 2012) and had a positive perception of their relationship (Bellavia & Murray, 2003). Conversely, research has shown low selfesteem individuals usually felt less loved (Murray et al., 2001), had a negative perception of the relationship (Bellavia & Murray, 2003), were sensitive to rejection (Murray et al., 2000), and had relationship-damaging behaviors (Orth et al., 2012), thereby undermining relationship satisfaction. ...
The present study aimed to examine the psychological mechanism underlying the relationship between attachment style and intimate relationship satisfaction in women. For this purpose, a cross-sectional research design was employed in which 233 women (Mage = 28.16 years) who were currently in a romantic relationship completed a questionnaire that assessed attachment style, relationship satisfaction, self-esteem, and flexible goal adjustment (FGA). The results showed that both high attachment anxiety and high attachment avoidance were associated with low relationship satisfaction. Self-esteem mediated the relationship between attachment insecurity and relationship satisfaction. Moreover, the mediation effect of self-esteem was moderated by FGA, such that only in women with high FGA was self-esteem a significant mediator in the relationship between an insecure attachment style and relationship satisfaction. The results have implications for enhancing women’s relationship satisfaction.
... Consequently, they are less reactive to cues of social rejection (Onoda et al., 2010). Unfortunately, people with low self-esteem are plagued by self-doubt that spills over into how they perceive the intentions of others (Marigold, Holmes, & Ross, 2007;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001;Murray, Holmes, MacDonald, & Ellsworth, 1998). This sensitizes them to rejection and has negative consequences for those around them. ...
Endorsement and acceptance of sexually coercive strategies as a means to an end contributes to the global problem of sexual victimization. The current research tests how personality traits that make people sensitive to rejection (i.e., self-esteem) and predisposed to non-communal attitudes (i.e., narcissism) interact with a situational factor—perceived social rejection—to predict when people endorse the use of sexual coercion. This work also explores whether different facets of narcissism better predict endorsement of coercion than others. Participants in two online studies (Ntotal = 740), completed background measures including the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale and the Narcissistic Admiration and Rivalry Questionnaire. Next, participants were randomly assigned to write about a recent incident of rejection or acceptance by a close other. Finally, endorsement of sexual coercion was measured using a questionnaire (adapted from Shackelford & Goetz, 2004). Consistent with predictions, across two studies, single (but not romantically attached) people with high narcissism and low self-esteem were more likely to endorse sexual coercion following reminders of rejection by close others. Our findings demonstrate that personality and situational factors interact to predict endorsement of sexual coercion, and that focusing on either alone might obscure the path to understanding the “whos” and “whens” of sexual assault.
... Individuals may need to be secure about their partner's love but also about their child's love. Both of these are problematic for LSE individuals (DeHart, Murray, Pelham, & Rose, 2003;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001) and might have multiple consequences for the coparental relationship. For example, parents with LSE may fear that their child prefers the other parent, which could encourage them to disregard the agreed rules in order to become the preferred parent. ...
The aim of this study is to investigate the longitudinal influence of self-esteem on romantic and coparental relationship quality. The data were drawn from the German Family Panel, pairfam. Parents (ncouples = 2,364) were assessed three times over 4 years. The results indicated that romantic and coparental quality decreased over time, while self-esteem remained stable. The self-esteem of both parents predicted initial romantic and coparental quality. Additionally, mothers’ self-esteem reduced the decline in romantic quality. Finally, romantic quality mediated the relationship between parents’ self-esteem and coparental quality. These results suggest that self-esteem might be a resource for the parental couple and even for the family unit, as romantic and coparental quality are key elements for the well-being of both parent and child.
... In contrast, individuals high in self-esteem usually show greater trust in their self-worth and in the love of their partners, which promotes satisfaction in their romantic relationships (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001;Utz & Beukeboom, 2011). In this regard, since they may not favor interactions with potential partners when they are in a relationship, it is reasonable to expect that they may not use SNSs as a means of seeking alternative romantic partners. ...
Despite the continued attention on the distinct behavioral and relational outcomes of narcissism and self-esteem, limited academic research has been devoted to investigating the influences of those individual differences upon behaviors of seeking and retaining a romantic relationship concurrently in the digital environment. The present study aimed to test the role that narcissism and self-esteem play in predicting individuals' attitudes toward behaviors in current and possible romantic relationships. The results demonstrated that individuals high in narcissism showed positive attitudes toward interacting with potential romantic partners on Instagram. Furthermore, they showed positive attitudes toward current relationship-related postings on Instagram. In contrast, individuals high in self-esteem exhibited negative attitudes toward interacting with potential romantic partners, whereas they showed positive attitudes toward posting photographs taken with their current romantic partners on Instagram. This study provides empirical evidence for the associations between individual differences and attitudes toward various behaviors on social networking sites (SNSs) in relation to both potential and current romantic relationships.
... Gaya perapatan turut sama mempengaruhi kualiti perkahwinan. Pasangan yang mempunyai gaya mengelak (avoidant style) melaporkan hubungan yang tidak memuaskan dibandingkan dengan pasangan yang mempunyai gaya perapatan terjamin (secure attachment) (Murray et al., 2001). Samaneh Najarpourian et al. (2012) [30] gabungan antara tahap neuroticism yang rendah dan ekstroversi yang tinggi. ...
Kualiti perkahwinan boleh diukur melalui pelbagai aspek termasuklah aspek kepuasan perkahwinan, komunikasi, penyelesaian masalah, penyesuaian hidup, dan konflik. Kajian-kajian lepas mengaitkan perkahwinan dengan status kesihatan, kesejahteraan psikologi, kegembiraan, dan kepuasan hidup. Perkahwinan juga memberi pengaruh yang besar kepada kerjaya, kewangan, kesihatan dan kejayaan hidup. Kertas konsep ini akan mengupas indikator-indikator kualiti perkahwinan yang utama berdasarkan kajian-kajian yang lepas. Indikator yang dipilih ialah pegangan agama, status ekonomi, pemilihan pasangan, gaya komunikasi dan personaliti.Dapatan-dapatan kajian lepas menunjukkan hasil yang konsisten mengenai indikator ini, iaitu berkait secara signifikan dengan kualiti perkahwinan. Kajian-kajian akan datang perlu mengkaji indikator yang lain juga bagi meramal kualiti perkahwinan seperti gaya pengurusan konflik, strategi penyelesaian masalah dan kaedah membuat keputusan dalam perkahwinan
... Gaya perapatan turut sama mempengaruhi kualiti perkahwinan. Pasangan yang mempunyai gaya mengelak (avoidant style) melaporkan hubungan yang tidak memuaskan dibandingkan dengan pasangan yang mempunyai gaya perapatan terjamin (secure attachment) (Murray et al., 2001). Samaneh Najarpourian et al. (2012) [30] gabungan antara tahap neuroticism yang rendah dan ekstroversi yang tinggi. ...
... Two questions measured commitment using a 9-point scale (1 = not at all true, 9 = completely true). The two questions were "I am very committed to maintaining my relationship" and "I have made a firm promise to myself to do everything in my power to make my relationship work" (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). Mean scores were used with higher scores indicating a higher level of relationship commitment, M = 8.4, ...
How an individual interprets a relationship social comparison may have important implications for the self and one’s relationship. We asked whether these interpretations significantly mediated the relation between the manipulated social comparison direction and relationship satisfaction, relationship commitment, satisfaction with life, and happiness for both dating (Studies 1 and 2) and married (Study 2) individuals. Participants were randomly assigned to make an upward or downward comparison to a friend’s romantic relationship and completed measures of their interpretations, relationship quality, satisfaction with life, and happiness. For both dating and married individuals, there were indirect effects of manipulated social comparison direction through the interpretations for all dependent variables. Although there were some differences in mediation for married and dating individuals, the effect sizes were not significantly different.
... This assumption was indirectly supported by the fact that those with a higher selfevaluation were more likely to succeed in an intimate relationship (Landolt, Lalumie`re, & Quinsey, 1995). Moreover, the awareness of self-evaluation affects individual satisfaction with and the development of the relationship (Franzoi, Davis, & Young, 1985;Solano, Batten, & Parish, 1982;Swami & Fyrnham, 2008); some insecure individuals are unable to position themselves and the relationship correctly (Derrick & Murray, 2007;Downey & Feldman, 1996;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001;Tucker & Anders, 1999). Nevertheless, the reasons why people in couples (compared with single people) have a stronger positive bias when evaluating self-face attractiveness require further exploration. ...
The present study sought to explore the effect of romantic relationships on the attractiveness evaluation of one’s own face using two experiments with the probability evaluation and the subjective rating method. Experiment 1 and Experiment 2 enrolled couples and single individuals as participants, respectively. The results of the two experiments indicated that the participants evaluated their own face as significantly more attractive than did others of the same sex. More importantly, the romantic relationship enhanced the positive bias in the evaluation of self-face attractiveness, that is, couple participants showed a stronger positive bias than did single individuals. It was also found that a person in a romantic relationship was prone to overestimating the attractiveness of his or her lover’s face, from the perspective of both probability evaluation and rating score. However, the abovementioned overestimation did not surpass the evaluations of the exaggeratedly attractive face. The present results supported the observer hypothesis, demonstrating the romantic relationship to be an important influential factor of facial attractiveness. Our findings have important implications for the research of self-face evaluation.
... Importantly, egosystem motivation can be activated in both high and low self-esteem people. Whereas low self-esteem people may doubt whether they have qualities that lead others to think highly of them (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001), high self-esteem people may believe they have desired qualities and want to ensure that other people "get" their positive qualities. ...
... Importantly, egosystem motivation can be activated in both high and low self-esteem people. Whereas low self-esteem people may doubt whether they have qualities that lead others to think highly of them (Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001), high self-esteem people may believe they have desired qualities and want to ensure that other people "get" their positive qualities. ...
... Across risky contexts, individuals with lower and higher self-esteem diverge in their motivational strategies, presumably rooted in self-esteem differences in perceived social worth (Murray et al., 2006). People with lower trait selfesteem experience a state of relative interpersonal deprivation, believing they are less acceptable to new and existing relationship partners (Murray et al., 2000;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001), being more sensitive and hypervigilant to rejection cues (Dandeneau & Baldwin, 2004;Downey & Feldman, 1996), and experiencing greater loneliness (Gailliot & Baumeister, 2007). Higher self-esteem individuals, on the contrary, are confident in their social worth, experience fewer relational doubts, and report that they have more fulfilling social bonds (e.g., Murray et al., 2000). ...
Self-esteem promises to serve as the nexus of social experiences ranging from social acceptance, interpersonal traits, interpersonal behavior, relationship quality, and relationship stability. Yet previous researchers have questioned the utility of self-esteem for understanding relational outcomes. To examine the importance of self-esteem for understanding interpersonal experiences, we conducted systematic meta-analyses on the association between trait self-esteem and five types of interpersonal indicators. To ensure our results were not due to self-esteem biases in perception, we focused our meta-analyses to 196 samples totaling 121,300 participants wherein researchers assessed interpersonal indicators via outsider reports. Results revealed that the association between self-esteem and the majority of objective interpersonal indicators was small to moderate, lowest for specific and distal outcomes, and moderated by social risk. Importantly, a subset of longitudinal studies suggests that self-esteem predicts later interpersonal experience. Our results should encourage researchers to further explore the link between self-esteem and one’s interpersonal world.
... Because of the antiquity and familiarity the Romeo and Juliet story has, the expectation that stigma and love are positively associated is not surprising; however, it should be noted that this a speculation on the authors' part, and there could be many, many reasons for perceiving relationships as more loving if they have higher amounts of stigma directed towards them. For example, Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, and Rose (2001) found that one's self concept changes the way one view one's relationship, or this effect could be a results of a false consensus bias (Ross, Greene, & House, 1977) when evaluating relationships. ...
We examined the connection between the perception of love and stigma in relationships and how much stigma needs to be present to elicit a heightened perception of love. Participants in the first study rated several relationships on the degree of stigma each one of them faced, and how much the individuals in each relationship loved each other—the perception of the Romeo and Juliet effect. In the second study, participants read a scenario of a male, gay relationship with various degree of stigma (none, one, two, or three sources), and rated how much the couple loved each other. The results suggest that there is a perception that the Romeo and Juliet effect exists, despite evidence that does not (Sinclair, Hood, & Wright, 2014). Individuals in relationships, which face stigma from multiple sources, are believed to love each other more than those with no stigma. Together, the results suggest that perceived stigma and love in a relationship are positively associated, which runs counter to better supported models of relationship satisfaction (Parks, Stan, & Eggert, 1983).
... were highly correlated. 2 Relationship quality. We examined perceived relationship quality in individuals' dating relationships using four questions by Murray, Holmes, Bellavia, Griffin, and Dolderman's (2002) to measure satisfaction, and two questions by Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, and Rose (2001) to measure commitment. The participants rated these six statements, such "I am extremely happy with my current romantic relationship" on a 9-point Likert scale, where 1 is not at all true and 9 is completely true. ...
How individuals interpret a relationship social comparison is important to their relationship quality. We asked whether relationship social comparison interpretations (RSCIs) differ from relationship attributions. Individuals were randomly assigned to compare their dating relationship to a friend’s relationship that was doing better (upward comparison) or worse (downward comparison) than their own. Individuals then completed measures for the RSCI and attributions for their own relationship success/failure (Study 1) and attributions for their friend’s relationship success/failure (Study 2). Correlations indicated that the RSCI and attributions were not isomorphic. Simultaneous regressions indicated that the RSCI was a more consistent predictor of relationship quality than were attributions. How individuals interpret social comparisons not just the comparison direction should be studied.
... Items were "I am very committed to maintaining my relationship" and "I have made a firm promise to myself to do everything in my power to make my relationship work" (http:// web5s.silverplatter.com.proxy1.lib.umanitoba.ca/webspirs/doLS. ws?ss¼Murray-Sandra-LþinþAU Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001; a ¼ .78). Finally, participants completed a single-item inclusion-of-other-in-self (IOS) Venn diagram assessing their perception of interpersonal closeness with their partner (Aron, Aron, & Smollan, 1992). ...
People frequently share information about their intimate relationships on Facebook and this information can be used by other users as material for romantic social comparisons. In a pilot study, participants indicated that photos, communication between the individuals in the couple, and indications of support were important for relationship comparisons. How individuals interpret relationship comparisons when exposed to a friend’s or acquaintance’s Facebook profile can impact the self and one’s relationship. Two experiments manipulated upward and downward relationship comparisons using mocked-up Facebook profiles of a young, attractive, heterosexual couple. That is, participants were exposed to the equivalent of an acquaintance’s Facebook profile. Manipulated comparison direction predicted individual’s relationship social comparison interpretations (RSCI). Direct effects of the RSCI and indirect effects of the manipulated comparison direction through RSCI on relationship quality, attention to alternatives, and personal well-being were found indicating that how individuals interpreted the relationship comparison was important. Individuals may react more strongly to comparisons with close others as opposed to distant others (Tesser, 1988), suggesting that comparisons with actual friends on Facebook could have a larger impact. Future research will continue to examine how online relationship comparisons to friends may influence long-term consequences of these interpretations (e.g., stay/leave decisions).
... When the sense of trust in romantic partners is unstable, individuals often feel vulnerable and act to protect themselves from possible betrayal (Murray, Holmes, & Collins, 2006). This includes viewing their romantic partners in a negative light, feeling uncertain about their relationship, and lower levels of commitment (Murray, Holmes, & Griffin, 2000;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001), whichmightcontributetothedissolutionofaromanticrelationship. Importantly, broken trust can also inspire conversations about relationship dynamics, inviting possibilities to strengthen the relationship. ...
Trust contributes to young people's capacity for sustaining current and future successful relationships. To date, research has yet to examine the meaning of trust in early dating relationships and reasons for its deterioration. The present study focused on video-recorded conversations about trust between 34 heterosexual adolescent couples in dating relationships living in the U.S. Transcripts from these conversations were qualitatively analyzed using thematic analysis to identify adolescents' meanings of trust and reasons they provided for a lack of trust in their romantic partners. All 34 couples identified concerns specifically related to infidelity. Six major themes for not trusting romantic partners emerged. Results suggested that the lack of trust in romantic relationships might stem from several areas that are directly and indirectly related to the current relationship, including low self-esteem, the experience of betrayal in past romantic relationships, partners' extradyadic behaviors, and gossip among peers. Importantly, peers can play a defining role in influencing young people's perceptions of their romantic partners and developing or sustaining trust in their romantic relationships.
... Finally, low self-esteem is associated with negative evaluations of relationships, as well as negative perceptions of romantic partners' regard and care (Murray et al., 2000;Murray, Holmes, Griffin, Bellavia, & Rose, 2001). Given that these outcomes are similar to the outcomes we predict for social anhedonia, we examine whether self-esteem can account for the effects of social anhedonia. ...
Objective:
Social anhedonia is a deficiency in the capacity to experience pleasure from social interactions. This study examined the implications of social anhedonia for romantic relationship functioning, including the association of social anhedonia with sentiments towards romantic partners that are central to relationship functioning (satisfaction, commitment, regard for the partner, and care for the partner's welfare) and analogous perceptions of the partner's sentiments.
Methods:
Data were collected from 281 participants who were involved in romantic relationships.
Results:
Social anhedonia predicted less satisfaction, regard, and care, and these effects were independent of attachment insecurity and self-esteem. In addition, social anhedonia had an indirect negative effect on commitment via attachment avoidance. Social anhedonia also predicted more negative perceptions of the partner's sentiments.
Conclusions:
Results suggest that social anhedonia may undermine the functioning of romantic relationships by reducing positive sentiments toward partners and security in the partner's sentiments toward the self. This article is protected by copyright. All rights reserved.
We are constantly forming impressions about those around us. Social interaction depends on our understanding of interpersonal behavior - assessing one another's personality, emotions, thoughts and feelings, attitudes, deceptiveness, group memberships, and other personal characteristics through facial expressions, body language, voice and spoken language. But how accurate are our impressions and when does such accuracy matter? How is accuracy achieved and are some of us more successful at achieving it than others? This comprehensive overview presents cutting-edge research on this fast-expanding field and will be essential reading for anyone interested in the psychology of interpersonal perception. A wide range of experts in the field explore topics including age and gender effects, psychopathology, culture and ethnicity, workplaces and leadership, clinicians' skills, empathy, meta-perception, and training people to be more accurate in their perceptions of others.
Abstrak Perceraian merupakan peristiwa yang sering dipandang negatif oleh anak sehingga menyebabkan mereka sulit untuk merasa bersyukur. Penelitian mengenai kebersyukuran menunjukkan bahwa social support memiliki keterkaitan dengan gratitude. Tujuan penelitian ini untuk melihat bagaimana kontribusi setiap dimensi social support terhadap gratitude pada dewasa awal yang orang tuanya bercerai. Penelitian ini dilakukan terhadap 111 individu, dengan menggunakan instrumen adaptasi skala GRAT (α=0.880, n=40) untuk mengukur gratitude, dan skala ISEL (α=0.92, n=31) untuk mengukur social support. Data penelitian di analisis dengan menggunakan teknik regresi linier berganda dan menghasilkan 3 dimensi social support dapat memprediksi gratitude; dimensi appraisal support (R 2 =0.125, p=0.000; p<0.05), dimensi belonging support (R 2 =0.140, p=0.000; p<0.05) dan self-esteem support (R 2 =0.047, p=0.008; p<0.05). Sedangkan dimensi tangible support tidak dapat memprediksi gratitude pada dewasa awal yang orang tuanya bercerai (R 2 =0.000, p=0.823; p>0.05). Appraisal support memprediksi gratitude secara negatif, semakin tinggi Appraisal support maka semakin rendah gratitude, demikian pula sebaliknya. Sedangkan belonging support dan self-esteem, masing-masing memprediksi gratitude secara positif, semakin tinggi belonging support dan self-esteem maka semakin tinggi gratitude. Kata Kunci: Social Support, Gratitude, Perceraian.
The importance of having high self-esteem is frequently debated in academic and public domains, and believing that high self-esteem causes good outcomes has recently been introduced as an impactful individual difference variable. For example, naïve theories about self-esteem's causal influence (e.g., believing that high self-esteem protects one's health) is related to an increased pursuit of self-enhancement. However, several critical qualities of the self-esteem importance scale (Vaughan-Johnson & Jacobson, 2020) remain unexamined, and we explore these questions across four main and two supplementary studies (total N = 1997). Self-esteem importance beliefs were stable across time and distinct from other self and motivational constructs. Consistent with expectations derived from prior research and theory, we found cultural (European-Canadian vs. Asian-Canadian) and gender differences on self-esteem importance. Finally, we demonstrate that high scorers on the self-esteem importance scale anticipate heightened responses to rejection vs. acceptance scenarios. Thus, self-esteem importance beliefs are chronologically stable, are relatively independent from past self-related variables, reflect known group differences from past research, and are linked with an amplified sensitivity to social threat versus reward. These findings support key theoretical claims made about the self-esteem importance construct, and suggest likely unintended consequences of promoting self-esteem's consequentiality.
COVID-19 caused unprecedented social disruption the likes of which many people had not seen since the Second World War. In order to stop the spread of the virus, most nations were required to enforce strict social distancing precautions, including orders to shelter in place and national lockdowns. However, worries over whether citizens would become fatigued by precautions that constrain personal liberties made some governments hesitant to enact lockdown and social distancing measures early on in the pandemic. When people feel that their social worlds are responsive to their needs, they become more trusting and more willing to sacrifice on behalf of others. Thus, people may view COVID-19 precautions more positively and be more trusting in government responses to such an event if they are inclined to see their sociorelational world as supporting their connectedness needs. In the current study (N = 300), UK residents who were more satisfied that their close others fulfilled their connectedness needs at the start of the government-mandated lockdown, perceived COVID-19 precautions as more important and more effective than those who were relatively dissatisfied in how their connectedness needs were being met, and reported greater trust in the government’s management of the pandemic. These effects persisted in a follow-up one month later. Implications for how society and governments can benefit from the investment in social connectedness and satisfaction, and future directions are discussed.
Whereas attachment dimensions (i.e., anxiety and avoidance) are generally associated with lower levels of relationship evaluations (e.g., satisfaction, commitment), research has not yet fully incorporated how partner attachment is related to these evaluations, nor how dyadic patterns (actor × partner attachment interactions) are associated with evaluations. Across two dyadic studies ( N = 185, 123 dyads), we examine how actor, partner, and actor × partner interactions of attachment anxiety and avoidance are associated with reports of trust, satisfaction, and commitment. Results generally revealed that actor effects of attachment anxiety on lower relationship evaluations were weaker when partners were more anxious and stronger when partners were more avoidant. Moreover, actor effects of attachment avoidance on lower trust and satisfaction were stronger when partners were more anxious. Finally, own avoidance was more strongly negatively related to commitment in the presence of a more avoidant partner. These results suggest that the combination of attachment within relationships is important to consider for both close relationships researchers and clinicians.
This study investigated the causal relationship between dysfunctional parenting and peer attachment, as well as the longitudinal mediating role of self-esteem, in early adolescence. Moreover, this study examined whether there were sex differences in these longitudinal relationships. This study used three-wave longitudinal data—measured at the fifth grade of elementary school, the sixth grade of elementary school, and the first grade of middle school—of 1,831 adolescents (935 boys and 896 girls; mean age = 10.98 ± 0.17 years at the first wave) who participated in the Korean Children and Youth Panel Survey. Autoregressive cross-lagged modeling analysis revealed the following: regardless of adolescents’ sex, the negative effects of dysfunctional parenting on self-esteem and the positive effects of self-esteem on peer attachment were all significant over time, while the levels of dysfunctional parenting, self-esteem, and peer attachment all remained stable over the three-year period. Furthermore, self-esteem partially mediated the longitudinal relationship between dysfunctional parenting and peer attachment for girls, whereas self-esteem completely mediated the relationship for boys. The results suggest the needs for lifelong parental education—provided from elementary school to parenthood—and for parents’ and teachers’ continued attention to peer relationships in early adolescence. Further, tailored interventions should consider the degree of vulnerability of dysfunctional parenting by adolescents’ sex and promote their self-esteem.
Interdependence, Interaction, and Close Relationships - edited by Laura V. Machia June 2020
Cambridge Core - Social Psychology - Interdependence, Interaction, and Close Relationships - edited by Laura V. Machia
Relationship maintenance encompasses a wide range of activities that partners use to preserve their relationships. Despite the importance of these efforts, considerably more empirical focus has been devoted to starting (i.e. initiation) and ending (i.e. dissolution) relationships than on maintaining them. In this volume, internationally renowned scholars from a variety of disciplines describe diverse sets of relationship maintenance efforts in order to show why some relationships endure, whereas others falter. By focusing on 'what to do' rather than 'what not to do' in relationships, this book paints a more comprehensive picture of the forms, functions, and contexts of relationship maintenance. It is essential reading for scholars and students in psychology, communication, human development and family science, sociology, and couple/marriage and family therapy.
Researchers have long theorized about the function of self‐esteem. Theories such as sociometer, terror management, and self‐determination have each received substantial empirical support, but all purport a different function of self‐esteem. Despite each theory's persuasiveness, they are sometimes at odds, and there remains no clear consensus regarding the function of self‐esteem. In the present paper, we propose the notion that self‐esteem monitors the meeting of multiple fundamental psychological needs, a theory we call the Need‐Satisfaction Framework of self‐esteem. We outline existing empirical support for our theory in the context of three well‐documented fundamental needs: belonging, self‐determination (i.e.,autonomy and competence), and meaning. Across all three needs, we review converging evidence supporting two hypotheses for self‐esteem's need‐monitoring function: (1) threats to needs lower self‐esteem and (2) high self‐esteem buffers defensive responses to need threats. We expand on established theoretical and empirical work in the domain of self‐esteem and also discuss testable future hypotheses.
In contrast to earlier research, the three studies reported here find that the most powerful individuals are also the most grateful, and that self-esteem plays a role in explaining this relationship. Study 1a (N = 109) reveals a strong, positive relationship between individuals’ perceived power and gratitude. Study 1b (N = 194) replicates this and finds that self-esteem mediates this positive power-gratitude relationship. Study 2 (N = 212) manipulates power and shows its downstream effects on gratitude through self-esteem, again providing support for the positive relationship of power to gratitude through self-esteem. We argue that because gratitude is predicated on recognition that others value oneself, power amplifies rather than undercuts feelings of gratitude. We discuss possible boundary conditions.
The present research examined how actor and partner attachment insecurity relates to biases in perceptions of partners’ core relationship-relevant constructs. Across three dyadic studies (Ncouples = 333, Nindividuals = 666), we examined attachment anxiety and avoidance as predictors of over- or underestimation of partners’ relationship satisfaction, commitment, and responsiveness, using partners’ own reports as the reference point for evaluating bias. Actors higher in avoidance and actors with partners higher in avoidance perceived their partners to be less satisfied and committed. In addition, actors higher in avoidance and actors higher in anxiety displayed a pessimistic bias, perceiving their partners to be less satisfied and committed than their partners reported being. Finally, actors with partners higher in avoidance displayed an optimistic bias, perceiving their partners to be more satisfied and committed than their partners reported being. Results underscore the importance of adopting a dyadic perspective on perceptual biases in romantic relationships.
Objective:
Having a responsive partner is important for the well-being of relationships. Unfortunately, people with low self-esteem (LSEs) perceive their partners to be less responsive than do high self-esteem people (HSEs). Although the common assumption has been that LSEs' negative partner perceptions are "all in their heads"-a reflection of their negative self-projection-we argue that LSEs' views of lower partner responsiveness are, in fact, warranted.
Method:
Across two studies (NStudy1 = 122 couples; Mage = 22.28; 50% female; NStudy2 = 73 couples; Mage = 19.96; 51% female), we examined LSEs' and HSEs' perceptions of their partners' responsiveness to their negative self-disclosures, and compared them with partners' reports (Study 1), and ratings from objective coders following a negative experience created in the lab (Study 2).
Results:
Consistent with our hypothesis, partners of LSEs were less responsive than partners of HSEs to disclosers' negative self-disclosures, as rated by disclosers, listeners, and objective observers. Study 3 (N = 99; Mage = 33.19; 54% female) explored possible mechanisms behind these self-esteem differences.
Conclusion:
The finding that partners of LSEs (vs. HSEs) are less responsive may contribute to LSEs' poorer relationships. This article is protected by copyright. All rights reserved.
Low self-esteem is often related to interpersonal difficulties. In fact, low self-esteem people fear rejection and tend to adopt self-protection goals. In the present work, we tested the idea that when low self-esteem individuals decide to sacrifice personal preferences for their relationship, they come to regret those actions, with further consequences for their well-being. We conducted a study with 130 couples, using experience sampling, daily diary, and a 1-year follow-up assessment. Results showed that low self-esteem is related to greater regret of past sacrifices, which, in turn, affects negative mood, stress, and life satisfaction. Furthermore, mediation analyses revealed that low self-esteem individuals feel less supported by the partner after they sacrifice, which helps explaining why they come to regret their sacrifices.
Individuals with social anxiety disorder (SAD) experience significant impairment in their social relationships. Here, we examine the relational difficulties associated with social anxiety across the lifespan. We conclude that socially anxious people unwittingly engage in behaviors that interfere with authentic self-expression and short-circuit relationship development, thereby cutting off the social connections that might modify their negative self-beliefs and social fears. The end result is that they often live in a state of emotional solitude - alone in the crowd.
Across three studies, Murray, Rose, Bellavia, Holmes, and Kusche (2002) found that low self-esteem individuals responded in a negative manner compared to those high in self-esteem in the face of relationship threat, perceiving their partners and relationships less positively. This was the first empirical support for the hypothesized dynamics of a dependency regulation perspective, and has had a significant impact on the field of relationship science. In the present research, we sought to reproduce the methods and procedures of Study 3 of Murray et al. (2002) to further test the two-way interaction between individual differences in self-esteem and situational relationship threat. Manipulation check effects replicated the original study, but no interaction between self-esteem and experimental condition was observed for any primary study outcomes.
Expressing our innermost thoughts and feelings is critical to the development of intimacy (Reis & Shaver, 1988), but also risks negative evaluation and rejection. Past research suggests that people with high self-esteem are more expressive and self-disclosing because they trust that others care for them and will not reject them (Gaucher et al., 2012). However, feeling good about oneself may not always be enough; disclosure may also depend on how we feel about other people. Drawing on the principles of risk regulation theory (Murray et al., 2006), we propose that agreeableness-a trait that refers to the positivity of interpersonal motivations and behaviors-is a key determinant of trust in a partner's caring and responsiveness, and may work in conjunction with self-esteem to predict disclosure. We examined this possibility by exploring how both self-esteem and agreeableness predict a particularly risky and intimate form of self-disclosure, the disclosure of emotional distress. In 6 studies using correlational, partner-report, and experimental methods, we demonstrate that self-esteem and agreeableness interact to predict disclosure: People who are high in both self-esteem and agreeableness show higher emotional disclosure. We also found evidence that trust mediates this effect. People high in self-esteem and agreeableness are most self-revealing, it seems, because they are especially trusting of their partners' caring. Self-esteem and agreeableness were particularly important for the disclosure of vulnerable emotions (i.e., sadness; Study 5) and disclosures that were especially risky (Study 6). These findings illustrate how dispositional variables can work together to explain behavior in close relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record
Relationship closeness is one of the best predictors of forgiveness. But what is the process by which closeness encourages forgiveness? Across three studies, we employed a mix of experimental and correlational designs with prospective (N = 108), scenario (N = 71), and recall (N = 184) paradigms to test a multiple mediation model. We found consistent evidence that the positive association between relationship closeness and forgiveness may be explained by levels of post-transgression trust in the offender. Moreover, trust always played the main mediating role in the forgiveness process, even when taking into account several transgression-specific variables associated with both trust and forgiveness (e.g., apology). We discuss the theoretical and practical implications of trust as a key indicator of forgiveness in close relationships.
We propose that because self-concepts allow people to predict (and thus control) the responses of others, people want to find support for their self-concepts. They accordingly gravitate toward relationship partners who see them as they see themselves. For people with negative self-views, this means embracing relationship partners who derogate them. Our findings confirmed this reasoning. Just as persons with positive self-concepts were more committed to spouses who thought well of them than to spouses who thought poorly of them, persons with negative self-concepts were more committed to spouses who thought poorly of them than to spouses who thought well of them.
Three studies, involving 146 undergraduates and 68 heterosexual couples, assessed the construct validity of the self- and other-model dimensions underlying the 4-category model of adult attachment. Five methods were used to assess the hypothesized dimensions: self-reports, friend-reports, romantic partner reports, trained judges' ratings of peer attachment, and trained judges' ratings of family attachment. Study 2 related the latent attachment dimensions to theoretically relevant outcome latent variables. As predicted, Ss' self models converged with direct measures of the positivity of their self-concepts, and Ss' other models converged with direct measures of the positivity of their interpersonal orientations. Study 3 related the latent attachment dimensions to 3 alternate self-report measures of adult attachment and showed that the 2 dimensions served as an organizing framework for the different measurement approaches. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
Reviews research on the relationship between self-perceptions and evaluations from other people. Studies of naturalistic interactions indicate that people's self-perceptions agree substantially with the way they perceive themselves as being viewed by others. However, there is no consistent agreement between people's self-perceptions and how they are actually viewed by others. There is no clear indication that self-evaluations are influenced by the feedback received from others in naturally occurring situations. When feedback from others is manipulated experimentally, self-perceptions are usually changed. However, methodological limitations such as the questionable external validity and strong demand characteristics of the experimental situations employed make the significance of these findings unclear. The available evidence is examined within a framework that considers the transmission, processing, and evaluation of judgments from others. Other means by which interaction may influence self-perceptions aside from direct evaluative feedback are considered. (4¼ p ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
It is proposed that satisfaction is associated with idealistic, rather than realistic, perceptions of one's partner. To provide baselines for assessing relationship illusions, both members of married and dating heterosexual couples were asked to rate themselves and their partners on a variety of interpersonal attributes. Participants also rated the typical and ideal partner on these attributes. Path analyses revealed that individuals' impressions of their partners were more a mirror of their self-images and ideals than a reflection of their partners' self-reported attributes. Overall, intimates saw their partners in a more positive light than their partners saw themselves. Furthermore, these idealized constructions predicted greater satisfaction. Individuals were happier in their relationships when they idealized their partners and their partners idealized them. Taken together, these results suggest that a certain degree of idealization or illusion may be a critical feature of satisfying dating and even marital relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
propose a model of the intimacy process
the process begins when one person expresses personally revealing feelings of information to another
it continues when the listener responds supportively and empathically
for an interaction to become intimate the discloser must feel understood, validated, and cared for
psychodynamic building blocks / building blocks from communication and exchange research / lay and psychometric conceptions of intimacy (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
Two experiments were conducted to examine the moderating effects of depression and trait self-esteem on reactions to social exclusion. Participants received information indicating that they had been included in or excluded from a laboratory group and that their inclusion or exclusion was based either on the other group members' preferences or on a random procedure. Participants who scored high in depression (Experiment 1) and low in self-esteem (Experiment 2) responded more strongly (and logically) to the experimental manipulations than participants low in depression and high in self-esteem. The results suggested that depression and low self-esteem place people at risk for dysphoria and self-devaluation following interpersonal rejection.
A hypothesized need to form and maintain strong, stable interpersonal relationships is evaluated in light of the empirical literature. The need is for frequent, nonaversive interactions within an ongoing relational bond. Consistent with the belongingness hypothesis, people form social attachments readily under most conditions and resist the dissolution of existing bonds. Belongingness appears to have multiple and strong effects on emotional patterns and on cognitive processes. Lack of attachments is linked to a variety of ill effects on health, adjustment, and well-being. Other evidence, such as that concerning satiation, substitution, and behavioral consequences, is likewise consistent with the hypothesized motivation. Several seeming counterexamples turned out not to disconfirm the hypothesis. Existing evidence supports the hypothesis that the need to belong is a powerful, fundamental, and extremely pervasive motivation.
It is proposed that satisfying, stable relationships reflect intimates' ability to see imperfect partners in idealized ways. In this study of the long-term benefits (or possible costs) of positive illusions, both members of dating couples completed measures of idealization and well-being 3 times in a year. Path analyses revealed that idealization had a variety of self-fulfilling effects. Relationships were most likely to persist-even in the face of conflicts and doubts-when intimates idealized one another the most. Intimates who idealized one another more initially also reported relatively greater increases in satisfaction and decreases in conflicts and doubts over the year. Finally, individuals even came to share their partners' idealized images of them. In summary, intimates who idealized one another appeared more prescient than blind, actually creating the relationships they wished for as romances progressed.
The degree to which an individual perceives interpersonal acceptance as being contingent on successes and failures, versus relatively unconditional, is an important factor in the social construction of self-esteem. The authors used a lexical-decision task to examine people's "if. . . then" expectancies. On each trial, participants were shown a success or failure context word and then they made a word-nonword judgment on a second letter string, which sometimes was a target word relating to interpersonal outcomes. For low-self-esteem participants, success and failure contexts facilitated the processing of acceptance and rejection target words, respectively, revealing associations between performance and social outcomes. Study 2 ruled out a simple valence-congruency explanation. Study 3 demonstrated that the reaction-time pattern was stronger for people who had recently been primed with a highly contingent relationship, as opposed to one based more on unconditional acceptance. These results contribute to a social-cognitive formulation of the role of relational schemas in the social construction of self-esteem.
The authors hypothesized a self-fulfilling prophecy wherein rejection expectancies lead people to behave in ways that elicit rejection from their dating partners. The hypothesis was tested in 2 studies of conflict in couples: (a) a longitudinal field study where couples provided daily-diary reports and (b) a lab study involving behavioral observations. Results from the field study showed that high rejection-sensitive (HRS) people's relationships were more likely to break up than those of low rejection-sensitive (LRS) people. Conflict processes that contribute to relationship erosion were revealed for HRS women but not for HRS men. Following naturally occurring relationship conflicts, HRS women's partners were more rejecting than were LRS women's partners. The lab study showed that HRS women's negative behavior during conflictual discussions helped explain their partners' more rejecting postconflict responses.
The authors argue that individuals regulate perceptions of their relationships in a self-protective way, finding virtue in their partners only when they feel confident that their partners also see virtues in them. In 4 experiments, the authors posed an acute threat to low and high self-esteem individuals' feelings of self-worth (e.g., guilt about a transgression, fears of being inconsiderate or intellectually inept). They then collected measures of confidence in the partner's positive regard and acceptance (i.e., reflected appraisals) and perceptions of the partner. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubt with heightened doubts about their partners' regard, which then tarnished impressions of their partners. In contrast, high self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubts by becoming more convinced of their partners' continued acceptance, using their relationships as a resource for self-affirmation.
The present work advances and tests an interdependence-based model of the associations among commitment, pro-relationship behavior, and trust. Findings from two longitudinal studies revealed good support for model predictions. Commitment-inspired acts such as accommodation and willingness to sacrifice provide diagnostic information regarding a partner's pro-relationship motives. Individuals come to trust their partners when they perceive that their partners have enacted pro-relationship behaviors, departing from their direct self-interest for the good of the relationship. The results of mediation analyses are consistent with a model of mutual cyclical growth in which (a) dependence promotes strong commitment, (b) commitment promotes pro-relationship acts, (c) pro-relationship acts are perceived by the partner, (d) the perception of pro-relationship acts enhances the partner's trust, and (e) trust increases the partner's willingness to become dependent on the relationship. Auxiliary analyses revealed that self-reported attachment style does not account for substantial variance beyond the features of interdependence that form the basis for the present model.
This study examined the longitudinal relation between causal attributions and marital satisfaction and tested rival hypotheses that might account for any longitudinal association found between these variables. Data on attributions for negative partner behaviors, marital satisfaction, depression, and self-esteem were provided by 130 couples at 2 points separated by 12 months. To the extent that spouses made nonbenign attributions for negative partner behavior, their marital satisfaction was lower a year later. This finding was not due to depression, self-esteem, or initial level of marital satisfaction, and also emerged when persons reporting chronic individual or marital disorder were removed. Results support a possible causal relation between attributions and marital satisfaction.
The authors proposed that personal feelings of self-esteem foster the level of confidence in a partner's regard critical for satisfying attachments. Dating and married couples described themselves, their partners, how they thought their partners saw them, and how they wanted their partners to see them on a variety of interpersonal qualities. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals dramatically underestimated how positively their partners saw them. Such unwarranted and unwanted insecurities were associated with less generous perceptions of partners and lower relationship well-being. The converse was true for high self-esteem individuals. A longitudinal examination of the dating couples revealed that the vulnerabilities of lows were only exacerbated over rime. A dependency regulation model is proposed, wherein felt security in a partner's perceived regard is suggested as a prime mechanism linking self-esteem to relational well-being.
Accounts of falling in love were obtained from three samples: (a) lengthy accounts from fifty undergraduates who had fallen in love in the last 8 months; (b) brief accounts from 100 adult nonstudents, which were compared to 100 brief falling-in-friendship accounts from the same population; and (c) questionnaire responses about falling-in-love experiences from 277 undergraduates, which were compared to falling-in-friendship-experience questionnaires from eighty-three similar undergraduates. Content analyses of Study 1 and 2 accounts and Study 3 questionnaire results suggested that falling in love was preceded by frequent reported incidences of discovering other's liked the self and noticing other's desirable characteristics (appearance and personality); moderate incidences of perceived similarity, propinquity and `special falling-in-love processes' (readiness, specific cues, arousal/unusualness, mystery, isolation); and relatively low reported incidences of filling needs and social influence. These patterns contrast with those suggested by the general-attraction and mate-selection literatures. Falling-in-friendship accounts, on the other hand, gave relatively more emphasis to similarity and propinquity, but somewhat less to reciprocal liking, other's desirable characteristics, needs, and the special falling-in-love processes.
It is proposed that satisfying, stable relationships reflect intimates' ability to see imperfect relationships in somewhat idealized ways-to make a leap of faith. Both members of dating and married couples completed a measure of relationship illusions, tapping idealized perceptions of the partners' attributes, exaggerated perceptions of control, and unrealistic optimism. Results of concurrent analyses revealed that relationship illusions predicted greater satisfaction, love, and trust, and less conflict and ambivalence in both dating and marital relationships. A longitudinal follow-up of the dating sample revealed that relationships were more likely to persist the stronger individuals' initial illusions. Relationship illusions also predicted increases in later satisfaction but not vice versa. These results suggest that positive illusions capture a prospective sense of conviction or security that is not simply isomorphic with satisfaction.
Recent years have witnessed a proliferation of research on close relationships and the emergence of a new relationship subdiscipline within the social sciences. To date, the new science of relationships has been dominated by data. This article is based on the conviction that progress now hinges on the development of theory to organize and interpret extant findings and to guide future investigations. Through a selective but extensive review of the major bodies of empirical literature, we attempt to show that attachment theory can incorporate a broad range of findings on adult relationships. In addition, attachment theory addresses an impressive array of research questions concerning the functions, emotional dynamics, evolutionary origins, and developmental pathways of human affectional bonds. We conclude that a comprehensive theory of close relationships is both desirable and, with the integration of existing theories and concepts, currently achievable.
In dyadic research, the responses of the two members of the dyad are likely to be non-independent. Statistical estimation for three different processes that bring about non-independence are presented. In each, a variable X influences Y. First, the X variable of one person may influence the Y variable of his or her partner. Second, the Y variables of the two people may directly influence each other. Third, the two X and Y scores may be indicators of couple-level factors.
A basic principle of attachment theory is that early attachment relationships with caregivers provide the prototype for later social relations. Working within an attachment framework, a new 4-group model of characteristic attachment styles in adulthood is proposed. In particular, two forms of adult avoidance of intimacy are differentiated: a fearful style that is characterized by a conscious desire for social contact which is inhibited by fears of its consequences, and a dismissing style that is characterized by a defensive denial of the need or desire for greater social contact. This distinction corresponds to two differing models of the self: people who fearfully avoid intimacy view themselves as undeserving of the love and support of others, and people who dismiss intimacy possess a positive model of the self that minimizes the subjective awareness of distress or social needs. The emotional and interpersonal ramifications of the two proposed styles of adult avoidance are discussed.
Seven basic research questions in interpersonal perception are posed concerning issues of consensus, assimilation, reciprocity, accuracy, congruence, assumed similarity and self—other agreement. All questions can be addressed at the individual level, and three at the dyadic level. It is shown how the Social Relations Model can be used to answer the questions.
Fifty-seven dating couples were studied on a variety of relationship measures. The interrelations among love attitudes and relationship satisfaction were of primary interest. However, for one subsample of couples, sexual attitudes, self-esteem, self-disclosure, commitment, investment, and relationship continuation/termination were also studied. Partners displayed similarity on a variety of measures, including several love attitudes, disclosure, investment, commitment, and relationship satisfaction. Some of the love attitudes were related to satisfaction, but several other measures (e.g., commitment, investment, self-esteem, and self-disclosure) were also important correlates of satisfaction. A follow up of 30 couples at 2 months after initial data collection assessed the variables that differentiated continuing and terminating couples. Implications of this set of results for other theories and for future research are discussed. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
[provide an] analysis of working models with regard to adult attachment / [consider] the structure and content of these models, including how they may differ for adults with different attachment styles / use [developmental literature] as a point of departure for suggesting how models of self and others are likely to be characterized in adulthood / consider how these models function and the processes through which they shape cognitive, emotional, and behavioral response patterns / incorporate attachment theory with a broader literature in cognitive social psychology on the role of mental representations in social functioning / [consider] the processes through which working models are likely to undergo adaptation and change (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)
This article argues that satisfaction in marriage is associated with motivated and benevolent biases in perception. Married couples individually completed measures of relationship satisfaction and described themselves and their partners on a series of virtues and faults. They also nominated friends who described each spouse on the identical qualities. The results revealed that intimates in satisfying marriages perceive more virtue in their partners than their friends or their partners themselves perceive. They also possess partners who see them in this benevolently distorted light. In contrast, intimates in less satisfying marriages perceive less virtue in their partners than their friends or their partners themselves perceive. The findings are discussed in terms of the role motivated cognition plays in sustaining satisfying relationships.
The practice of computing correlations between “difference” or “discrepancy” scores and an outcome variable is common in many areas of social science. Relationship researchers most commonly use difference scores to index the (dis)similarity of members of two-person relationships. Using an intuitive, graphical approach—and avoiding formulas and pointing fingers—we illustrate problems with using difference score correlations in relationship research, suggest ways to ensure that difference score correlations are maximally informative, and briefly review alternatives to difference score correlations in studying similarity, accuracy, and related constructs.
There are few topics so fascinating both to the research investigator and the research subject as the self-image. It is distinctively characteristic of the human animal that he is able to stand outside himself and to describe, judge, and evaluate the person he is. He is at once the observer and the observed, the judge and the judged, the evaluator and the evaluated. Since the self is probably the most important thing in the world to him, the question of what he is like and how he feels about himself engrosses him deeply. This is especially true during the adolescent stage of development.
Five studies tested hypotheses derived from the sociometer model of self-esteem according to which the self-esteem system monitors others' reactions and alerts the individual to the possibility of social exclusion. Study 1 showed that the effects of events on participants' state self-esteem paralleled their assumptions about whether such events would lead others to accept or reject them. In Study 2, participants' ratings of how included they felt in a real social situation correlated highly with their self-esteem feelings. In Studies 3 and 4, social exclusion caused decreases in self-esteem when respondents were excluded from a group for personal reasons, but not when exclusion was random, but this effect was not mediated by self-presentation. Study 5 showed that trait self-esteem correlated highly with the degree to which respondents generally felt included versus excluded by other people. Overall, results provided converging evidence for the sociometer model.
Peer Reviewed http://deepblue.lib.umich.edu/bitstream/2027.42/68519/2/10.1177_014920639402000311.pdf
A new 4-group model of attachment styles in adulthood is proposed. Four prototypic attachment patterns are defined using combinations of a person's self-image (positive or negative) and image of others (positive or negative). In Study 1, an interview was developed to yield continuous and categorical ratings of the 4 attachment styles. Intercorrelations of the attachment ratings were consistent with the proposed model. Attachment ratings were validated by self-report measures of self-concept and interpersonal functioning. Each style was associated with a distinct profile of interpersonal problems, according to both self- and friend-reports. In Study 2, attachment styles within the family of origin and with peers were assessed independently. Results of Study 1 were replicated. The proposed model was shown to be applicable to representations of family relations; Ss' attachment styles with peers were correlated with family attachment ratings.
The antecedents of marital stability (divorce or remaining married) and marital satisfaction (within the group that remains married) were investigated with a panel of 300 couples who were followed from their engagements in the 1930s until 1980. Twenty-two of the couples broke their engagements; of the 278 couples who married, 50 got divorced at some time between 1935 and 1980. Personality characteristics (measured by acquaintance ratings made in the 1930s) were important predictors of both marital stability and marital satisfaction. The three aspects of personality most strongly related to marital outcome were the neuroticism of the husband, the neuroticism of the wife, and the impulse control of the husband. In combination, the 17 major antecedent variables were moderately predictive of a criterion variable composed of both marital stability and marital satisfaction (R = .49). The three major aspects of personality accounted for more than half of the predictable variance. The remaining variance was accounted for by attitudinal, social-environment, and sexual history variables.
This study examined the longitudinal relation between causal attributions and marital satisfaction and tested rival hypotheses that might account for any longitudinal association found between these variables. Data on attributions for negative partner behaviors, marital satisfaction, depression, and self-esteem were provided by 130 couples at 2 points separated by 12 months. To the extent that spouses made nonbenign attributions for negative partner behavior, their marital satisfaction was lower a year later. This finding was not due to depression, self-esteem, or initial level of marital satisfaction, and also emerged when persons reporting chronic individual or marital disorder were removed. Results support a possible causal relation between attributions and marital satisfaction.
Theories of how initially satisfied marriages deteriorate or remain stable over time have been limited by a failure to distinguish between key facets of change. The present study defines the trajectory of marital satisfaction in terms of 2 separate parameters--(a) the initial level of satisfaction and (b) the rate of change in satisfaction over time--and seeks to estimate unique effects on each of these parameters with variables derived from intrapersonal and interpersonal models of marriage. Sixty newlywed couples completed measures of neuroticism, were observed during a marital interaction and provided reports of marital satisfaction every 6 months for 4 years. Neuroticism was associated with initial levels of marital satisfaction but had no additional effects on rates of change. Behavior during marital interaction predicted rates of change in marital satisfaction but was not associated with initial levels.
The authors proposed that personal feelings of self-esteem foster the level of confidence in a partner's regard critical for satisfying attachments. Dating and married couples described themselves, their partners, how they thought their partners saw them, and how they wanted their partners to see them on a variety of interpersonal qualities. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals dramatically underestimated how positively their partners saw them. Such unwarranted and unwanted insecurities were associated with less generous perceptions of partners and lower relationship well-being. The converse was true for high self-esteem individuals. A longitudinal examination of the dating couples revealed that the vulnerabilities of lows were only exacerbated over time. A dependency regulation model is proposed, wherein felt security in a partner's perceived regard is suggested as a prime mechanism linking self-esteem to relational well-being.
Romantic love and sexual jealousy Jealousy (pp. 101-109) Attachment and loss
- E Berscheid
- J Fei
Berscheid, E., & Fei, J. (1977). Romantic love and sexual jealousy. In G. Clanton & L. G. Smith (Eds.), Jealousy (pp. 101-109). Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall. Bowlby, J. (1982). Attachment and loss: Vol. 1. Attachment. London: Hogarth.
The limits of sexual strategies the-ory and the promise of attachment theory for explaining human mating
- C Hazan
- L Diamond
Hazan, C., & Diamond, L. (in press). The limits of sexual strategies the-ory and the promise of attachment theory for explaining human mating. Review of General Psychology.
University of Chi-cago Press The daily experiences of dat-ing and married couples
- Mind
- Chicago
- Murray
Mind, self and society. Chicago: University of Chi-cago Press. Murray et al. / SELF-DOUBT AND RELATIONSHIP BELIEFS Murray, S. L., Bellavia, G., & Rose, P. (2000). The daily experiences of dat-ing and married couples. Unpublished data, University at Buffalo, The State University of New York.
Ordinary personology The handbook of social psychology
- D T Gilbert
Gilbert, D. T. (1998). Ordinary personology. In D. T. Gilbert, S. T. Fiske, & G. Lindsey (Eds.), The handbook of social psychology (Vol. 2, pp. 89-150).
Trust in close relationships Review of personality and social psychology: Close relationships
- J G Holmes
- J K Rempel
Holmes, J. G., & Rempel, J. K. (1989). Trust in close relationships. In C. Hendrick (Ed.), Review of personality and social psychology: Close relationships (Vol. 10, pp. 187-219). Newbury Park, CA: Sage.
Self-esteem: The puzzle of low self-regard
- R F Baumeister
Baumeister, R. F. (1993). Self-esteem: The puzzle of low self-regard. New York: Plenum.