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The ups and downs of dating: Fluctuations in satisfaction in newly formed romantic relationships
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
Abstract
This research examined the association between relationship satisfaction and later breakup status, focusing on the temporal changes in satisfaction ratings of individuals in newly formed dating relationships. Growth curve analytic techniques were used in 2 longitudinal studies to create 4 predictors: each participant's initial level of satisfaction, linear trend in satisfaction over time, degree of fluctuation in satisfaction over time, and mean level of satisfaction. Consistent with hypotheses, individuals who exhibited greater fluctuation in their repeated satisfaction ratings were more likely to be in relationships that eventually ended, even after controlling for overall level of satisfaction. Individuals with fluctuating levels of satisfaction also reported relatively lower commitment. The results are discussed in terms of conditions that promote versus undermine relationship stability.
... Research demonstrates that higher levels of relationship quality are often beneficial and lower levels of relationship quality are often disadvantageous for the relational partners. In comparison, volatility (within-person variability across 14 days, as we assessed in this study) in relationship quality seems uniquely detrimental for relational partners (Arriaga, 2001;Arriaga et al., 2006;Campbell et al., 2010) as volatility in relationship quality may signal relational turbulence or instability (see review by Eastwick et al., 2019). Daily volatility in relationship quality predicts greater reports of distress and destructive couple interactions (Campbell et al., 2010); weekly volatility predicts eventual relationship dissolution (Arriaga, 2001) and greater depressive symptoms (Whitton & Whisman, 2010); and volatility over a more extended amount of time (i.e., every 4 months for 2 years) predicts diminished life satisfaction (Whitton et al., 2014). ...
... In comparison, volatility (within-person variability across 14 days, as we assessed in this study) in relationship quality seems uniquely detrimental for relational partners (Arriaga, 2001;Arriaga et al., 2006;Campbell et al., 2010) as volatility in relationship quality may signal relational turbulence or instability (see review by Eastwick et al., 2019). Daily volatility in relationship quality predicts greater reports of distress and destructive couple interactions (Campbell et al., 2010); weekly volatility predicts eventual relationship dissolution (Arriaga, 2001) and greater depressive symptoms (Whitton & Whisman, 2010); and volatility over a more extended amount of time (i.e., every 4 months for 2 years) predicts diminished life satisfaction (Whitton et al., 2014). ...
... Examining what predicts levels of relationship quality; however, does not explain whether these levels remain constant from day to day. Because high volatility in relationship quality has potentially detrimental effects beyond levels of relationship quality (Arriaga, 2001, Campbell et al., 2010Eastwick et al., 2019), it is essential to understand what characteristics in individuals and partners promote more stability (i.e., less volatility) in relationship quality. Therefore, we examine whether people who have higher trait levels of approach motives, and lower trait levels of avoidance motives, report less volatility in relationship quality from day to day. ...
Conflicts are inevitable in romantic relationships. Couples sometimes choose the pro-relationship strategy of relational sacrifice to address such conflicts. Previous research established that examining sacrifice motives (i.e., approach and avoidance) is meaningful in understanding relationship quality. Using interdependence theory and 14 days of diaries with 110 heterosexual couples, we extend previous research by testing how sacrifice motives predicted both mean levels and volatility of daily relationship quality (i.e., satisfaction, commitment, intimacy, passion, trust, and love). Specifically, we examined actor and partner reports of sacrifice motives as individuals’ average levels (trait; between-person differences) and daily levels of sacrifice motives on a specific day (state; within-person differences) in predicting relationship quality. When predicting mean levels of relationship quality, individuals’ own (actor) trait and state approach and avoidance motives predicted most relationship quality variables. Results were less robust for partner effects, especially for partner trait and state approach motives. When predicting volatility (within-person variability across 14 days) in relationship quality, patterns were more robust for both approach and avoidant motives and for both actor and partner effects. For approach sacrifices, and for all six relationship quality variables, individuals’ trait approach motives predicted lower volatility, whereas avoidance motives predicted higher volatility. For partner effects, individuals reported lower volatility in satisfaction, intimacy, passion, and trust when their partners were higher in approach motives, whereas they reported higher volatility in satisfaction, commitment, intimacy, and trust when their partners were higher in avoidance motives. We discuss the importance of studying dyads and testing the associations between sacrifice motives and daily relationship quality—both levels and volatility.
Narratives play an important role in the development of the self-identity. Romantic relationships offer a powerful context in which to develop these narratives about the self through the good and the bad experiences people have with their partners. However, the stories we tell can also be colored by how we already see ourselves. In a secondary analysis, using a prospective longitudinal study of people in established romantic relationships (N = 402), we tested pre-registered hypotheses regarding how attachment anxiety and avoidance lead people to develop narratives about their relationship high-points and transgressions, and whether these narratives influence their relationship satisfaction over time. Relatively higher avoidance, but not anxiety, was related to narrative construction. Those relatively higher in avoidance made more negative event connections about themselves in their transgression narratives, and more positive event connections about themselves in their relationship high-point narratives. Narrative content, however, did not mediate the association between attachment anxiety and avoidance and relationship satisfaction. Despite the lack of support for some of our pre-registered hypotheses, these findings provide valuable insights into how insecure attachment influences the stories people tell about their relationships, and how they link these events back to the self.
At its core, romantic relationship status is binary (i.e., one is either single or partnered). However, many people often do not describe their status using this dichotomy. As such, we establish the construct perceived relationship status (PRS; the extent to which a person perceives themself as single versus partnered), and we demonstrate that people’s actual relationship status (ARS) and PRS are not always in alignment. In the current preregistered study, 150 participants reported their PRS across 27 hypothetical pre- and post-establishing exclusivity scenarios. We found considerable variation in PRS for every scenario, indicating that PRS is in fact distinct from ARS and is influenced by context for most people. Additionally, for the post-establishing exclusivity scenarios, the results of two repeated measures ANOVAs revealed that participants reported being significantly more single in certain intradyadic and social contexts than others. We also used this scenario data to qualitatively identify five distinct Consistent and Inconsistent profiles based on the nature of participants’ PRS-ARS misalignment. Lastly, we explored increased acceptance of infidelity as a potential outcome of the PRS-ARS misalignment within the context of the bachelor party, but our results did not indicate a significant association between the two. The implications of these findings and the need for future PRS research are discussed.
Intimate partner violence (IPV) is alarmingly prevalent among sexual and gender minority youth assigned female at birth (SGM‐AFAB), making it important to identify risk factors that can be targeted in prevention efforts for this population. Although several relationship‐level risk factors for IPV have been identified in different‐sex couples, research on SGM‐AFAB is sparse and predominantly cross‐sectional. The present study used seven waves of data from a longitudinal cohort study of SGM‐AFAB youth (n = 463) to explore relationship factors (relationship quality, destructive conflict, and self‐ and partner‐jealousy) as risk factors for perpetration and victimization of three types of IPV (physical, psychological, and coercive control). At each wave, participants reported on relationship factors and IPV for up to three romantic partners in the past 6 months. Multilevel models tested for associations between the relationship factors and IPV at three levels: between‐persons, within‐persons across time (wave), and within‐persons across relationships. Relationship quality was associated with IPV mostly at the between‐persons and within‐persons (wave) levels. Couple conflict was associated with all IPV outcomes at all levels. Partner jealousy was more consistently associated with IPV victimization; participant jealousy was more consistently linked with IPV perpetration. These novel findings suggest that, within SGM individuals, IPV may be influenced by relationship quality, destructive conflict, and jealousy as they fluctuate within individuals from relationship to relationship and within individuals over time. As such, these relationship factors represent promising potential targets for interventions to reduce IPV among SGM‐AFAB youth.
Early romantic relationships are salient to the development of healthy future relationships. Yet, little is known about the evolution of romantic relationships of emerging adults since most of the research has been conducted on married or well-established couples. The current study aims to examine how relationship satisfaction and negative communication evolve and are interrelated during emerging adulthood. Using age as a time metric, we conducted group-based dual trajectory modeling analyses on 1566 unmarried Canadian individuals (from 17 to 24 years old) in a relationship, who could either stay with the same partner or change partner over time. A four-group model for relationship satisfaction and a four-group model for negative communication were found. Dual analyses highlighted the high concordance between specific trajectories of both constructs. These findings demonstrate that relationship satisfaction and negative communication do not evolve in the same ways for everyone and provide useful insights to existing clinical interventions.
Current and recent relationship evaluations offer important information about the strength and stability of relationships. The diagnostic value of relationship evaluations should motivate people to accurately recall recent changes in relationship quality (tracking accuracy) but may also increase sensitivity to times of low relationship quality (directional bias). Such a vigilant pattern of tracking accuracy and negatively biased memories of relationship quality should be amplified for those high in attachment anxiety. The current study used repeated assessments to compare memories of relationship quality across several weeks with actual evaluations of relationship quality gathered in prior weeks (787 weekly reports, N = 113, 94% women). People high in attachment anxiety more accurately tracked the ups and downs of past relationship quality, but also remembered times of low relationship quality to be lower than actually reported. People high in attachment anxiety also experienced greater depressed moods across weeks when they remembered their relationship quality more negatively. These results have important implications for understanding inconsistencies in prior research and the links between attachment anxiety and depressed mood.
Prior research suggests that financial strain negatively impacts relational outcomes and that fluctuations (i.e., volatility) in daily reports of relationship aspects may be detrimental for relational outcomes. Daily relational uncertainty may also be associated with financial stressors; however, little is known about the association between financial strain and levels of daily relational uncertainty, as well as the volatility in day-to-day relational uncertainty. The current study includes both members of 100 adult different-sex couples (relationship length M = 7.0 years, SD = 7.1) who completed 14 days of daily diaries. We examined whether greater baseline financial strain is associated with higher levels of daily relational uncertainty and greater day-to-day volatility in relational uncertainty among actors and partners. Individuals who reported greater financial strain also reported higher overall levels of daily relationship uncertainty, as well as greater volatility in daily relationship uncertainty. The association between actor financial strain and volatility in daily relationship uncertainty was moderated by gender and marital status, such that financial strain was only associated with greater volatility in daily relationship uncertainty for men (but not for women) and for unmarried (but not married) individuals. Evidence for partner effects were also found, where partners’ higher levels of financial strain was associated with less volatility in actors’ daily relational uncertainty; however, this relationship was moderated by income, gender, and marital status. Individuals with lower income levels (versus high income levels) reported less volatility in their daily relationship uncertainty when their partners reported higher financial strain. Males rather than women reported lower volatility in daily relational uncertainty when their partners reported greater financial strain. In addition, unmarried rather than married individuals reported greater volatility in daily relationship uncertainty when their partners reported higher financial strain. Implications for future research and practice are discussed.
Background: Sense of purpose, or the extent to which one perceives their lives to have meaningful goals and directions, may aid in initiating satisfying and stable new connections while positively maintaining old ones for college students.
Purpose: The current study sought to evaluate how a college students' sense of purpose during their first week of college may predict their satisfaction with different relationship types throughout their first semester of university.
Research Design: At the beginning of the semester, students reported their sense of purpose, and every week of the semester they reported their weekly relationship satisfaction across a variety of domains (i.e., parents, home friends, university friends, roommates, resident assistants, and significant others).
Study Sample: The current study followed-up first year college students (n = 364) from a private Midwestern university who all participated in the same Psychology of Young Adulthood class.
Data Analysis: Multilevel models were conducted to evaluate mean-level relationship satisfaction trajectories throughout the first semester and whether sense of purpose predicted those trajectories when accounting for gender and the Big Five personality traits.
Results: Friendships with home friends and university friends as well as parental relationships increased in satisfaction during the first semester, while relationships with roommates and resident assistants decreased. Furthermore, a higher sense of purpose was associated with greater relationship satisfaction with university friends and parents, even when accounting for the Big Five personality traits, as well as greater relationship satisfaction stability.
Conclusions: Findings paint a nuanced and equivocal nature of relationships during the first semester, and point to the need to better understand how and when sense of purpose does or does not yield positive relationships over time.
The ways that couples form and manage their intimate relationships at higher and lower levels of socioeconomic status (SES) have been diverging steadily over the past several decades. At higher SES levels, couples postpone marriage and childbirth to invest in education and careers, but they eventually marry at high rates and have relatively low risk for divorce. At lower SES levels, couples are more likely to cohabit and give birth prior to marriage and less likely to marry at all. This review examines how SES comes to be associated with the formation, development, and dissolution of intimate relationships. Overall, research has highlighted how a couple's socioeconomic context facilitates some choices and constrains others, resulting in different capacities for relationship maintenance and different adaptive mating strategies for more and less advantaged couples. A generalizable relationship science requires research that acknowledges these differences and one that recruits, describes, and attends to socioeconomic diversity across couples.
Expected final online publication date for the Annual Review of Psychology, Volume 72 is January 4, 2021. Please see http://www.annualreviews.org/page/journal/pubdates for revised estimates.
Past work has shown that perceived responsiveness is a key predictor of relational outcomes. However, this work has focused solely on average levels of responsiveness and never studied the role of responsiveness variability (consistency of responsiveness) in intimate relationships. The present study addressed this gap by investigating the long-held but scarcely tested tenet that responsiveness variability and average responsiveness play differential roles in romantic attachment. New romantic couples ( N = 151) reported partner-specific attachment anxiety and avoidance in six sessions. Every evening during the 3-week period in between the first two sessions, participants reported perceived partner responsiveness, allowing us to assess both average responsiveness and responsiveness variability. Our findings provided the first empirical evidence that responsiveness variability uniquely predicted increases in partner-specific attachment anxiety, whereas average responsiveness uniquely predicted decreases in partner-specific attachment avoidance. Average responsiveness and responsiveness variability continued to predict attachment orientations assessed about half a year later.
Used a longitudinal study of heterosexual dating relationships to test investment model predictions regarding the process by which satisfaction and commitment develop (or deteriorate) over time. Initially, 17 male and 17 female undergraduates, each of whom was involved in a heterosexual relationship of 0-8 wks duration, participated. Four Ss dropped out, and 10 Ss' relationships ended. Questionnaires were completed by Ss every 17 days. Increases over time in rewards led to corresponding increases in satisfaction, whereas variations in costs did not significantly affect satisfaction. Commitment increased because of increases in satisfaction, declines in the quality of available alternatives, and increases in investment size. Greater rewards also promoted increases in commitment to maintain relationships, whereas changes in costs generally had no impact on commitment. For stayers, rewards increased, costs rose slightly, satisfaction grew, alternative quality declined, investment size increased, and commitment grew; for leavers the reverse occurred. Ss whose partners ended their relationships evidenced entrapment: They showed relatively low increases in satisfaction, but their alternatives declined in quality and they continued to invest heavily in their relationships. (39 ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2006 APA, all rights reserved).
This article employs interdependence theory as a means of understanding how and why some relationships survive difficult times whereas other promising relationships end. Interdependence theory makes important distinctions between satisfaction and dependence. These distinctions are extended in the investment model, a theory of the process by which individuals become dependent on and committed to their relationships. The investment model suggests that dependence increases not only as a consequence of increasing satisfaction, but also because available alternatives are perceived to be poor and numerous important resources are invested in a relationship. Subjective commitment summarizes the nature of an individual's dependence on a partner, and represents broad, long-term orientation toward a relationship. Strong commitment not only makes individuals more likely to remain with their partners, but also promotes a variety of relationship maintenance behaviors such as adaptive social comparison and perceived relationship superiority, derogation of attractive and threatening alternatives, effective management of jealousy and extrarelationship involvements, willingness to sacrifice for the good of a relationship, and tendencies to accommodate rather than retaliate when a partner behaves poorly.
This study examined the relationship between reasons given for changes in commitment, on the one hand, and the development of commitment and later marital satisfaction, on the other. Forty-one newlywed couples were interviewed to obtain graphs of changes in commitment during courtship and reasons for the changes, which were coded into fourteen categories. Four years later thirty-nine of the original participants completed a marital happiness questionnaire. Reasons involving intrapersonal norms were related to commitments formed rapidly. Reasons that concerned interaction with and attributions about the network were associated with dramatic changes in commitment, accelerated commitments, and lower marital satisfaction. Reasons involving alternative dating partners were connected to moderate changes in commitment; long, rocky courtships; and lower marital satisfaction. The association between dyadic reasons and the development of commitment was weak, although reasons that concerned agreement on stage of involvement, disclosure, and behavioural inter-dependence were related to marital happiness. We discuss two types of commitment processes, event-driven and relationship-driven, and their implications for marital outcomes.
We examined the subjective processes by which premarital partners (n = 113) become more or less committed to wed over time. Two commitment processes were identified. In relationship-driven commitments, commitment evolved smoothly with few reversals. To explain changes in commitment, partners focused on their interaction and activities with one another and with their joint network and on positive beliefs about the relationship and about network members. Event-driven commitments had more extreme changes in commitment, with sharp downturns alternating with sharp upturns. Partners attributed changes to episodes of self-disclosure and conflict, negative relationship beliefs, separate interaction with network members, and negative network beliefs. On several measures, event-driven partners reported more negative relationship experiences and were less compatible. Yet the two groups did not differ on love or other indicators of involvement. The implications of the two processes for marital decisions are discussed.
We conducted a longitudinal investigation to advance our understanding of determinants of the breakups of premarital relationships. We considered causes, derived from several major theories, that were located in a variety of sources in the relationship, in the social network environment, and in the individual. We extended previous longitudinal research methodologically by analyzing the data with hazard analysis, in which the dependent variable is the instantaneous rate at which a relationship terminates. In the analyses we examined how measures of different factors affected the rate at which a relationship changed from intact to broken up. We found that several variables were significant predictors of the rate at which relationships terminated, including comparison level for alternatives, amount of time spent together, dissimilarity in race, support from partner's social network, and duration of the relationship. These findings offer evidence suggesting that variables derived from social exchange, similarity, and social network theories all contribute toward an explanation of premarital breakups.
The purpose of the present study was to examine the association between naturally occurring changes in people's impressions and their recollections of themselves, close others, and their relationship. It was reasoned that (a) reconstructing the past consists primarily of characterizing it as similar to, or different from, the present; (b) people employ implicit theories of personal stability to make this judgment; and (c) when these theories imply stability, people may overestimate the similarity between the past and the present. In an initial session, subjects rated themselves, their dating partner, and their relationship on dimensions that people expect to be stable over time. Two months later, subjects made current evaluations on the same dimensions and recalled their earlier ratings. Subjects whose impressions became more favorable over time recalled more positive evaluations than they had provided originally, and those whose impressions became less favorable recalled more negative evaluations. Finally, subjects recalled their causal attributions for their partner's behavior as being more consistent with their current impressions than was the case. In general, subjects overestimated the similarity between the present and the past.
Recent years have witnessed a proliferation of research on close relationships and the emergence of a new relationship subdiscipline within the social sciences. To date, the new science of relationships has been dominated by data. This article is based on the conviction that progress now hinges on the development of theory to organize and interpret extant findings and to guide future investigations. Through a selective but extensive review of the major bodies of empirical literature, we attempt to show that attachment theory can incorporate a broad range of findings on adult relationships. In addition, attachment theory addresses an impressive array of research questions concerning the functions, emotional dynamics, evolutionary origins, and developmental pathways of human affectional bonds. We conclude that a comprehensive theory of close relationships is both desirable and, with the integration of existing theories and concepts, currently achievable.
In this article I explore the motivated construal processes that allow individuals to dispel doubt and sustain conviction in the face of less-than-perfect partners and relationships. The surface features of conviction are discussed first with a focus on the positive illusions that predict relationship well-being and stability. The structural underpinnings of conviction are then discussed with a focus on the cognitive mechanisms that contain the implications of negativity within positive relationship representations. I conclude by discussing possible self-evaluation motives that may interfere with intimates dispelling doubt and finding the sense of conviction needed to sustain satisfying, stable romantic relationships.
Current approaches to analyzing longitudinal data in marital research are limited because they make use of only two waves of data at a time, thus yielding incomplete and potentially inaccurate descriptions of how marriages change, The purpose of this article is to introduce marital researchers to the analysis of individual growth curves. This technique uses multiwave longitudinal data to estimate parameters of change within individuals before accounting for variability in change between individuals, A step-by-step guide to this procedure is presented, followed by a discussion of its advantages and implications for longitudinal research on marriage.