Romantic Beliefs and Myths in Spain

Abstract

Data from a representative sample of the Spanish population (1,949 participants between ages 18 and 65) were analyzed to examine the strength of the principal romantic myths and the link between sex, love, and marriage in Spain. A survey was made up and was administered by interviewers. The results show the strength of these myths and the relationship between the three above-mentioned variables. Women, people with fewer years of formal education, and older people were more likely to believe in the myths and the relation between sex, love, and marriage was stronger in these groups. The findings are discussed in terms of different psychosocial theories.

Full text

Thc
Spanish
Jonmal
of
Psychology
1999,
Vol,
2.
No,
1.64-73
Copyright
1999
by
The
Spanish
Jounial
of
Psychology
138-7416
Romantie
Beliefs and
Myths
in
Spain
Ana
Barrón
López
de
Roda, David
Martínez-Iñigo,
Pilar
de
Paúl,
and Carlos
Yela*
Complutense
Uriiversity
of
Madrid
Data
from
a
representative
sample
of
the
Spanish
popuiation
(1,949
participants
between
ages
IB
and
65)
were
analyzed
tú
examine
Ihe
strength
of
ihe
principal
romantic
myths
aud
the
link
between
sex,
low,
and
marriage
in
Spain.
A
survey
was
made
up and
was
administered
by
interviewers.
The
resulis
show
the
strength
of
these
myths
and
the
relationship
between
the
(bree
above-mentioned
variables.
Wonien, people
~vith
fewer
ycars
of
formal
education,
and
older
people
were
more
like¡y
tú
believe
in
the myths
and
íhe
relotion
between
sez,
love,
and
marriage
‘vaS
sironger
in
these
groups.
The findings
are
discusscd
in
lerma
of
different
psychosocial
theories.
Key
wordv:
~onIontíc
,nvths,
se.v,
love,
Iflarriage
rn
este
artículo
se
analizan
los
datos
de una
investigación
realizada con
una
muestra
representativa
de
la
población
española
respecto
a
la
vigencia
de
los
principales mitos
románticos
y
la
vinculación
entre
sexo,
amor
y
matrimonio.
Se
elaboré
un
cuestionario
para
evaluar
dichas
variables,
que
fue
administrado,
en
forma
de
entrevista,
a
1.949
personas.
Los
resultados
indican
la
gran
vigencia
de
dichos
mitos
y
la
estrecha
relación
entre
las
tres
variables
indicadas
anteriormente,
especialmente
en
el
caso
de
las mujeres,
personas
de
mayor
edad
y
con
menor
nivel
de
estudios. Los
resultados
se
comentan
desde
diferentes
teorías
psicosociales.
Palabras
claves: mitos
románticos,
sexo,
amor,
matrimonio
*
Authors
appear
in
alphabetical
order.
This
paper is
part
of
Ihe research
‘Loving
Behavior:
A
representative
sample
of
Spanish
population,’
funded by
the
Comision
Interministerial
de
Ciencia
y
Tecnología,
carried
out
by
J.
L. Sangrador
García,
A.
Barrón
López
de
Roda.
P.
de
Padí
Velasco,
C. Yela
García.
anó
O.
Martínez
Iñigo,
and
supervised
by Florencio
Jiménez
Burillo.
Correspondence
concerning
this
article
should
be
addressed
tú
l)r.
Ana
Barrón
López
de
Roda.
Departamento
de
Psicología
Social.
Facultad
de
Psicología.
Universidad
Complutense
de
Madrid.
Campos
cte
Somosaguas.
28223
Madrid
(Spain).
64

ROMANTIC
MYTHS
Since
RougemonLs
(1938) and
Burgess
and
Lock&s
(1945)
pioneer
works, myths aud
cultural
bel
jeis
concerning
love,
marriage,sex and
[he
interconnection
between
them
has
been
considered
a
key
issue
to
understand
intimate
relationships(Cancian,
1987;
Crosby,
1973;
Goede,
¡959;
1-letch,
Marsion,
&
Larkey,
1994;
Kayser,
1993;
Martínez-
Iñigo,
¡997;
Noller, 1996;
Solomon,
1988; Yela, 1995,
¡996,
1997, 1998).
Recen[ly,
Dion
aud
Dion
(1996)
have
claimed
more
artention
for
cultural
variablesrelated
to
close
re¡a[ionships.
Despite
rhe
universal
or
particular
nature
of
love,
the
main issue
has
been
[he
meaning
and
function
that
each
culture,
throughou[
diffcrent
historical
periods,
has
assigned
to
¡ove,
and
[he
consequences
[bis
has
on
intimate
relationships
(Jankowiak
&
Fisher,
1992).
Taking
into
aceount
te
majo
role
leve
plays
jo
human
happiness,
health,
and
general
satisfaction
(Argyle,
1987;
Baiión,
1990),
and
the
relevance
to
the
social
síructure
of
interpersonal
relations
based
en
ove, marriage
is
s[ill
[he
comerstone
of
the
farnily
in
our
culture
(Simpson,
Campbel¡.
&
Berscheid,
1986;
C.LR.E.S,,
1992).
One
can
see
that
scientific
knowledge
of
thesc issues
could
offer
solutions
abeur
how
te
confrent
and
solve
te-
preblerns,
which
may
emerge
in
and
froto
rclatienships.
Sorne
authers,
belonging
te
academic
research
and
clinical
practice,
luye
pointed
out
Ihar
expecrations,
beliefs,
and
the
meaning
that
subjects
ahach
to sorne
events
in
their
intimate
uelatienships
are
seurces
of
disappeintment,
lack
of
affection,
and
instability
(Beck,
1988;
Pien
&
Dion,
1996;
Ellis
&
Grieger,
1977;
Kayser,
1993;
Noller,
1996).
Mos[
of
[hese
beliefs
are
cultural
censtructs
sharcd
by
individuals.
Each
historical
period
has
developed
a
differcnt
view
of
leve,
sex,
and
marriage;
censequently,
thc
rela[ionship
between
these
three
elemenís
has
changed
rhreugheut
time.
lii
ancleol
Greece,
affective
relatieoships
(hctere~
and
fundarnentallyhomosexual)
were
clesely
linked
[o
the
sexual sphere andclearly separated
frorn marriage.
In
marriage,
enly
[he
wife
was
required
te
be
sexually
faithful
fo
her
husband,
and
the
purpose of
sex
was
exclusively
procreatien.
During
[he
Roman
Empire,
eretie
and
recreationalpleasure
was
alse
separate from marriage,
linked
to
eccasional
and
speradic
cenquests.
In
<he
l-ligh
Middle
Ages,
leve, marriage,
and
sexual
pleasure
were
regarded
as
[hree
independent
entities
te
be
satistied
in
different
relarionships.
Frem
the
16th
te
the
lSth
century,
arranged marriage
centinued
to
exis[
simul[aneously
wi[h
extramarital
“remantie
leve,’
which
was
oeosexLval,
originaring
in
medieval
genteel
leve.
Since
the
beginning
of
[he
l9th
century,
[he
links
between
[he
remantic
leve
cencep[s,
marriage,
and
sexuality
emerge,
and
[his
trend
was
censelidated
in
eur
cen[ury.
From
then
en,
remantic
¡ove
ceased
to be
minority
aud
became
popular
and
nermative.
Marriage
emerged
as a
personal
choice;
be[h
remantic
love
and
sexual
satisfaction
sheuld
be
satisfied
within
marriage
Gr
a
stable
relatienship
(Fisher,
1992;
Hendrick
&
Hendrick,
1992;
Iglesias
de
Ussel,
1987;
Malo
de
Molina,
1992;
Martín
Gaite,
1987;
Ortega
y
Gasse[,
1926, 1952;
Reugemon[,
1938;
Selernon,
1988; Yela,
¡995).
Taking
into
account
[bis
historicalprocess
and
the
initial
censiderations
about
culture
and
intimate
relatienships,
we
carried
eut
a
survey
en
a
representative
sample
of
te
Spanish
pepulatien
in
erder
lo
explore
whe[her
lay
peeple
hold
the
beliefs
[bat
sorne
au[hors
define
as
distinctive
of
contemporary
leve
(Averilí
&
Beothroyd,
1977;
Ceek
&
McHenry,
1978;
Geed,
1976;
Hendrick
&
Hendrick,
1992;
Liebowitz,
1983;
Peele,
1975;
Schaef
1989;
Simen,
Eder,
&
Evans,
1992;
Simpsen
e[
al.,
1986;
Sternberg,
¡988;
Tennov,
1979;
Van
Sommers,
1987).
Wc
classiñed
these
beijeis,
using
[be
recení
review
of
scientific
literature
en
intirnate-relationship
beliefs
carried
out
by
Yela
(1995).
We
consider
tUs
elassiticatioo
useful
lcr
eur
research
aims.
Cencretely,
we
assessed
[he
following
myths
er
beliefs:
1.
The
equivalence
myth:
leve
understeed
necessarily
as a
strong
passion,
supposedly
the
same
as
“being
in
leve~’
(so
that
if
one
does
not feel
the
same
passion
as in
the
first
days,
it
means one
does
fol
really
ove
ene’s
partner,
and
should
íherefere
pul
an eral
te
te
relationship).
2.
Ihe
“heuer-haIf’
myíh:
thebelief
thaI,
in
sorne
way,
[here
is
semeene
predestined
lot
each
person.
3.
Re
cxci
USIV«/WSS
(of
being
iii
¡ove>
my[h:
which
assumes
that
it
is
impessible
[e be in
love
with
twe
people
at
te
same time.
4.
The eternal
passion
rnyth:
[be
belief
that
the
intense
passien
of
the
firs[
síages,
II it
is
real,
will last,
er
it
sheuld
las[,
foreven
5.
The
omnipotente
(¡ove
conquers
oil)
myth:
which
implies
[hat [rus[ing real
leve
will
get
areund
andeverceme
all
ebstacles.
6.
Thefidelity
myth:
which,
iii lís
extreme
fermulatien,
suppeses
tha[
if
someene
is
really
in
leve,
he
or
she
will
always
be
sexually
faithful
[e
the
partuer
(therefere,
il
ene
is
ne[
faithful,
ene
dees
neí
really
leve
one’s
partner).
7.
The
Inarriage
niyth:
which
censiders
that
leve,
thaI
is,
passion
er
being
in
leve,
is
te
ene and
enly
reason
lot
marriage.
8.
The
cauple
myth:
which
síates
that
[he
ceuple
-
relatienship
is
inheren[
te
human
nature
and, as such,
presení
in
ah
eras
and
cultures.
As
[entative
hypoíhesis,
we
posited
that
mest
people
in
Spain,
as in
other
westernceuntries,
would
held
<bese
beliefs,
whieh
we
called
romanric
rnyths.
Mereever,
we
explered
[he
dilferences
according
te
sex,
age,
and
social
and
cultural
level.
Finally.
we
were
interested
in
te
cennection
betwecn
these
myrhs,
marriage,
and
sex.
Accerding
[o
the
historical
precess
described aboye,
we
expected
[o
find
a
strong
connection
be[ween
these
three
elemenís.
The role
of
seciedemographic
variables
was
alse
considered. This
is [he
Iirst
time
[bese
issues
were
ernpirically
[estcd en a
representative
sample
of
Spanish
pepulatien.
65

BARRÓN
LÓPEZ
DE
RODA.
MARTíNEZ-IÑIGO,
DE PAÚL,
AND
YFILA
Meted
Participanís
Participants
were
Spanish
men
(u
=
955)
and
women
(n
=
994).
ranging
freír
18
te
65
years
of
age,
¡iving
in
towns
ofever
2,000
inhabitants.
including
island
previnces.
In
aH,
1,949
interviews
were
carried
out.
The
participants
were
divided
into
¡Wc
age
ranges:
¡8-24
years
oíd (u
=
367).
25-
34 (u
=
487),
35-44
(u
=
398),
45-54
(u
=
329),
and
55-64
(a
=
366).
We
ernployed
multiple
steps
and
layers
by
clusters.
selecting
sample
prirnary
units
(tewns)
and
secondary
units
(sectiens)
randem¡y,aud
the smallest
unís
(individuals)
by
randompaths
and
quotas
el
sex
and
age.
The
layers
were
formed
by
correla[ing
the
17
regienste
the
size
of
habitat,
divided
inte seven
categeries:
Iess
iban
2,000
inbabi[ants; 2,001
te
10,000
inhabilants;
10,001
te
50,000;
50,001
te
100,000;
¡00,001
te 400,000;
400,001
[e
1,000,000;
and
ever
a
million
inhabi[ants.
The
sample
error,
a[
he
level
of
cenfidence
of
95
5%
was
+
2.23
for
te
whole
sample.
Measu
res
Eren
the
above-mentienediheoretical
backgrounds,
a
survey
was created,
whichgathered
informatien
about
<he
follewingvariables:degree
el
support
of
romantic
myths,
link
between
leve,
sex,
and
marriage,
seciedemographic
variables
(such
as sex,
age,
and
educador,)
and
the
elher
factors
íhat
theprevicus
review
of
specialized
literature
en
leve
shew
te
be
related
<heoretically
or
empirically
te
love
relarienships, sexual
aítirudes,
sexual
behavior,jealousy,
and
durationof
ihe relationship
(Yela, 1995).
The
survey
was
administered
ir
the
forn
of
interviews,
betwecn
July
5
and
30, 1995.
Romaníic
n¡yths.
Each
myth
was
assessed
wirh a
speciflc
iten,
whieh
was
simply
the
descriptien
of
the
myth
(see
aboye),
with
which
<he
subject
expressed
bis
er
herdegree
of
agreement
en
a
Sinterval
centinuum:
1
=
strot,glv
disagree;
2
=
disagree;
3
=
neutral
or
mediuní;
4
=
agree;
and
5
=
strougíy
agree.
The
alterratives
“den’t
know’
aud
“no
reply’
were
added.
Wc also
oblained
a global myth score
fer
each
subjecr,
which
was
<he
mean
el
<he
stibjects
sceres
en
<he
myth
iterns.
Link betweeti
sex,
leve,
and
níarriage.
A
set
of
ilems.
including
the
separatien
be[ween
eachpossible
cembination
of
twe
elernents
from
[he
trio
“sex,
leve,
and
marriage,”
assessedthe
cennection
between
these
three
elemenis.
ihe
subjectspecificd
bis
or
her
level
el
agreement
en a 5-
interval
con
dnuum,
wherc
1
=
e¡enients tvere
completelv
connectedaud
5
e¡eníen¡sItere
coníp¡etelv
separate.
Therefere,subjects
had
<o
decide
wlie<her
lo
exp]ici<iy
accept
or
rejeer
(point
3
being
mediun¡
or
neutral)
sex
witheut
niarriage,
leve
without
marriage,
sex
without
leve,
love
witheutsez,
marriage
witheut
sex,
aud
marriage
without
leve.
A
general
score
fez
se.x-mnarriage-ieve
separation
was cIsc calculated,
represenled
by
ihe
mean
of
the
six
preceding
seeres.
/‘eelings
of
jectlousv.
Two
dimensices
el
jealeusy
(ernetienal
and
sexual,
according
te Buunk
&
Bringle, 1987)
were
assessed
hy
two
items,
with
which
the
subject
expressed
his or
her degree
of
agrcernent
en a
5-intcrval
centinuurn,where
1
=
strongiv disagree.
and
5
=
síronglv
agrer.
Lmetieral
jealousy
refers
<o
<be
partner’s
intiniacy
with
ether
people,
aud
sexual
jealousy
refers
explicitly
te
sexualreiatienships.
A
ttiníde
íoíuards
fiJe/it
y.
5
u
bjects
were
requested
te
exprcss
<he
impertance
of
fidelity
lcr
<bern
en a
4-interval
continuum,where
1
tun
at
alí
itaportaní,
aud
4
=
verv
ímportatit.
Altraction
towards
oíhers.
Measured
by
twe
items,
subjects
wcrc
requested
te
cheese
freír
seven
categeries,
indicating
<he
number
of peeple
te
whorn
[hey
Fiad
felt
sexually
(en
ene
item)
and
emotienally
(en
the
e[her)
attracted.
These
categories
were:
“nene,’
“1
,“
“2
te
4,”
“5
te
l0,~’
“11
te
20,’
“21 te
100,~~
“mere
<han
l00~
Sexual
experience.
As
with
leelirgs
el
sexual
a[traction
tewards
ethers,
subjects
were
requested
te
check
ene
categery.
indicatirg
with
how
many
peeple
they
hadhad
sexual
rela[iens,
using
the
sane
categoríes
as
mentioned
aboye.
Years
of
jorníal
educauion.
One
question
requested
subjects
te
indicate
the
level
el
formal
educatien
they
had
achieved.
Religloas
beliefs
a,íd
behavior.
Seven
optiens
were
effercd:
Cathoiic,
other
reiigiens,
indifferent,
agnostic, atheist,
ce
open
eption,
and
“1
don’t know
er
no
reply”.
Wc
greuped
tegether
the
“believers’
(Carholics
and
echer
religiens)
en
the
one hand.
and
<he
“non-believers”
(atheists
and
agnos<ics)
en
the
ether. Wc
alse
askedabeul
te
frequency
of
attending
church
services
(categeries
were
never
a
kw
tutíes
a
vea,;
a
few titties a
mon.th,
alitiost
«ven’
Sitada
y.
and
severa!
dais
a
week).
Finally,
WC
alse
asked
suhjects
about
Iheir
sex.
age,
and
duratien
of
their
reiationship.
Results
aral
Discussien
Roníande
Myths
Thc
first data analysis
previded
us witb
the
global
percentages,
the
difference
of
mean
scores
between
men
and
women,
and
Pearsen’s
cerrelations
between
certain
sociedemegraphic
variables,
such as age
and
level of studies.
it
is
importad
te
note
<he
s[rength
el
romantic
my<hs
in
rernan<ic
reialionships
in
etir
.society
nowadays
(see
Tables
1
and
2).
66

ROMANT1C
MYTHS
Table
1
Percentage
of
Behevers
ir
Mxths, Means,
Standard
Deviations,
atíd
D~fferences
iii
Ro¡nantic
Myths,
according
lo
Sex
Myth
%
believers
Men
Won,en
Difference
Total
¡14
SD
a M SD
u
í
M
SD
Equivalenee
“Better-half’
Exclusiveness
45
50
55
3.12
3.04
3.23
1,18
1.26
1.26
924
934
934
3.10
3.34
3.39
1.26
t.21
1.3(1
965
964
966
~
~5.32*
~.2,69*
3.11
3.19
3.31
1.22
1.24
1.28
Bernal
Passion
Omnipotence
Sexual
Fidelity
Marriage
Ceuple
65
25
80
85
95
3.56
3.84
3.91
3.99
4.30
1.16
1.05
0.99
1.03
0.68
938
943
947
944
947
3.59
3.99
4.16
4.23
4.37
<.23
1.02
0.91
0.86
0.65
971
966
987
990
990
~
~335*
~5.86*
~5.69*
—
3.57
3.91
4.03
4.11
4.33
1,02
1.03
0.96
0.95
0.66
Global
my<h
seGre
75%
3.63 0.58 865 3.28 0.57 875
—5.54’
3.71
0.52
Note.
Empty
celís
indicate
statiscally
nonsignifican<
dilferences.
*
p
<
.01
Table
1
reveals
[hat
75
%
of
<he
sample
seored
higher
than
3
en
<he
global
myth scere
(which
measured
agreement
with
rornantic
myths).
Only
15
%
scered
3
er
below
(thc
remaining
10%
did not
repiy
te
any
my[h
items).
Cencerning
significan[
sex
diflerences,
Table
1
shows
that
wemen
expressed
síronger
beliel
in
live
of
<he
eigbt
myths
(better-half,
exciusiveness,
emnipetence,
sexual
fideiity,
md
narriage).
The
fact thai women
believed
ir
rornantic
myths
mere
than
men
is
in
accordance
with
the
greater
value
they
place
en
remanticisn
in
eccasional
relatienships
as well
as
in stable
enes
(Dien
&
Dien,
1979;
Houston,
1981).
On the
ene
hand,
sex
diflerences
can be
explained
by [he
differential
secializatienprocess
el
sex.
Sociobiologists
peint
out
that
te
choese
a
love-sex strategy,
which
wouid
newadays
be
considered
romantie,
has higher
repreductive
value
for
women,
prebably
because
of
their
greater
adaptive
capacityfrom
an
evelutienary
point
of view.
n
E
a,
E
45.
4,4—
4,3—
4,2—
4,1—
4—
3,9—
38—
3,7—
3,6—
3,5
3,4—
3,3—
3,2—
3,1
—
3—
When
we
censider
the
nyths
aitogether,
Wc
alse
observed
a
slightiy
stronger
belief
in
wornen
(general
rneans
were
3.63
and
3.78
br
men
and
wemen,
respectiveiy,
p
=
.000,
as
seen
ir
Table
1).
Although
<he
sex
differences
were
sta[is[ically
significan[,
they
were
s[ill
síralí
and
the
mean
for
men
(lewer
than [hat
el
wernen)
fer
ah
myths
was
always
over
3
(<he
so-cailed
rnedium
rarge
value
-
althougb we
cannel
be
sure of
<he
psychelogical
rneaning
of
that
central
value
as a
“medium”
or
“central’
point,
as
acknewledged
by alí
researchers
en
a[titudes).
There
were
no
statisticailysignif¡cantdifferences
in
[he
equivalence
mytb
(M
=
3.12
and
3.10
fer
men
and
women,
respectively),
[he
eternal
passion
myth (M
=
3.56
and
3.59
ter
men
and
women,
respectively),
and
<he
ceuple
myth (M
=
4.30
and 4.37
br
mer
and
women,
respectively).
This shows [he
strength
of
remande
myths in
today’s
Spanish
pepulation.
E
Men
E
Women
Equiv
‘Beller
Hall
Ev
Excius
Elernal
Omnip
Romantio myths
F¡delily
Marriage
Cauple
figure
1.
intensi<y
of
<be
belief
o
romantie
my<hs
o
<be
Spanish
pepuia<ion.
67

BARRÓN LÓPEZ DE
RODA,
MARTÍNEZ-NICO,
DE
PAÚL,
AND
YELA
As
displayed
in
Table
2.
the
majerity
el
the
rornantie
my[hs
cerrelate
pesi<ively,
althoughenly
medera<ely, with
age
(the
correlation
be<wecn
age
and
the
global
seore
was
r
=
.22,
p
.000).
The
dilferences
between
the
remantie
heliefs
of
<he
yeungesrgroup
(18-25
years)
and
<he
oldes<
greup
(55-65
years)
—
where
<he
grea<es<
dillerences
were
observed
—
we¡e
almos<
always
rela<ively
srnall, and.
in
any
case,
síraller
than
expec<ed
(assuming
<hat
yeung
peeple
possess
certain
eharac<eristics,
sueh
os
rebellieusness,
noneenforrni<y,
etc.).
It rnay be
<hat
the
new
generations
are
sornehowmere
conservative
than
the
previous
enes,
and
<his
includes
issues
of leve
and
sex.
Hewever,
remande
myths
seern
te
be
very
ex<ended.
Cenceming
<he
cerrelarions
between
rornantic
rnyths and
level
of
studies (see Table 2), they
were.
in
general, negative
and
statis[ically
signilicant
at [he
level
of cenfidenceof
99%.
In
sorne
cases,
sueh
as
<he
eterral
passien
my<h
and
the
global
my[h
seore,
tbe
correlatien was
higher
[han r
=
-.25,
p
=
.000.
Significanteorrelations
and
dilferences
alse
appearcd
when
taking
into
account
religicus
beliefs.
Agnostiesand
atheists
(n
=
177)
seored
3.25
en
<he
global
mylh
score,
whereas helievers
(almest
ah
were
Cathelics)
scored
3.80.
p
.000.
Religieus
behavier
was
positively
ard
signif¡cantly
related
<e
alí my[hs,
aud
also
te
<he
global
myth sco¡e, r
.25,
p
=
.~U.
Therefere,
belief
iii
remantie
nyths
was stronger
ter
Cathelics
asid
peeple
with a Iovíer
leve
1
el
educatien,
asid
weaker
br
agnes[ics
aud
people
wi<h
higher
educatien
levels.
However,
as
shewn
in
Tables
1
and
2,
Wc
wiIl
analyze
each
myth
separately:
1.
The
equivalence
ínyrh.
This
was
accepted
by
45%
of
<he
sampie
(scoring
4
er
5),
whereas
40%
rejected
it
(seoring
1
er
2;
only
7%
tetally
disagreed),
and
<he
rernaining
15
%
were
made
up
of
those
whe
were
deubtful
(scering
3)
01
<lid
not
reply.
There
were
no statisí.ically
significaredilferences
In
sex
er
age, but,
OR
the
edier
haud,
we
feund
a
statistically
significant
negative
relatien
with
the
level
of
studies,
r
=
-
.14,
p <
.01.
Belief
in
<his
myth
has
a
notable
effect
en
remande
rclationships.
Psychesocial
inves<igations
have
sta[ed
tha<
physieiegieal,
psychelegical,
and
interpersenal
relation
processes,
<ypical
of
<he
intense
state
of
“falling
and
being
in leve,”
sIowly
lade
away
and
<urn
into
different
processes
as
the
relationship develeps (Liebowitz,
1983;
Selomen,
1980;
Sternbcrg,
1988;
Wilson.
1981;
Yela,
1997).
That
is
why
it
is
imper<an<
leí
beth
members
of
<he
ceuple
te
aceept
Ibis
change
as
senething
natural
instead
of
experiencing
it
as
traumatie,
as
is
usually
<he
case.
2.
‘[he
better-haif
;nyth.
This
my<h
was
aceepted
by
50%
of
the
sample, whereas
35%
disagreed (answers in
total
disagreement
did not
reach
10%).
Tbis
is
where
scx
differenees
were mere
proneuneed
(but
only 3.34
Vs.
3.04
for
wemen
and
men,
respec<ively).
Women
agreed
mere,
as
with
the
rest
el
<he
myths.
Resui<s
showed
lhat
belief
in
¡lis
rny<h
increased
wi<h
age,
r
=
.l3.p
< .01,
and tended
te
deerease
witb
<he
level
el
studies,
r
=
-.20,
p
<
.01.
Table 2
Correlations
between
Roníantic
Alvrhs,
Age,
aíd
Siudies
My<h
Age
Sudies
r
a
Equivalenee
..-.
1887
~.l4*
1883
‘Beí<er-half
.13
¡896
—.20’
1892
Exelusiveness
.15
1898
—.10’
1894
Eternal Passion
.17
<907
~.26*
1903
Omnipetence
.18
1907
~.2¡*
¡9(13
Sexual
Eideli<y
.18
<932
—.
IR’
1928
Maniage
.15’
1932
~,l3*
1928
Ceuple
—
935
—
193<
(ilobla
rny<h
seore —.2t
1738
—.3<)
1734
Note.
Emp<y
celE
indicate
s<a<i.seally
nensignif¡ean<
differenees.
*
p
<
.0<
3.
‘[he
e.rclusive,iess
<ff1,
Ciap
ja
love
myíh.
This
was
accepted
by
55%
of
<he
sample
(enIy
8%
disagreed
<otally).
Mere
women
tended
<o
share
¡he
belief
as did
older
people
and
<hese
wi<h
a
lower
level
of
studies,
al<hough
these
diflerences
were
ne<
large
in
either
case.
4.
‘[he
eternal
passion
nívth.
This
myth
is
a
problem
because,
seoner
os
later, it
conrradicts
reality
-
due
te
well
-
knewnphysiolegical,psyehelogical,
and
interpersenal
processes,
fer
exaniple.
sa<uratien.
reduction
of
uneertainty,
<oleranee,
[he
Ceelidge
effecí,
<he
law
of
changing
emo<iens,
etc.
(Frijda,
1988;
Skinner,
1953;
Selomon.
1980;
Wilson,
1981).
Never<heless,
it
was
shaíed
by
appreximately
two
íhirds
el
<he
sample,
whereas
barely 5%
of
the
sample
disagreed
te<ally
with
<he
myíb.
Beth men
and
women
believed
in
it: tlíis
myth
cerrelated
pesitively
with age, r
=
.17, p < .01,
and
‘vas
the
ene
witl<
the
highest
correladon
with
<he
level
of
studies,
r
=
-.26,
p
< .01.
5.
‘[líe
o;nnipotetice
,nvth.
This
my[h
xvas
aceepted
by
75</o
of
<he
sample;
only 2%
disagreed
to<a¡ly.
As
witb
<he
previcus
my<hs,
thebelief
was weaker
among
¡he
yeungest
and
<hese
wi<h
a
higher
level
el
studies. Up
te
85%
el
<he
people
wi<h
no
síLidies
aud
abou<
half
of
<he
pos<graduates
accepted
<his
behiel
as
<rue.
6.
‘[he
fidelitiv
mvth.
This
was
accepred
by
80</o
el
the
sample,
whereas enly
1%
disagreed
te<alIy
(ne<e
that
<he
rnyth
dees
net
refer
te
dic
impeitanee
of
fidelity
but
te
its
censideratien
as a
nccessary
cenditien
lcr
<rue
leve). This
eeuld
be
taken
as
preol
of
<he
immensc
pewer of
secializatier
in
contrelling
biological
insrincs.
On
<he
ether
hand,
al<hough
wemen
agreed
wi<h
<he
myth
significantly
more
ihan
men,
<he
diflerence
was
qui<e
small,
and
<he
percentage
of
men
was
higherene
would
expect
(ever
75
Mo
of
<he
men
agreed
with
it)
il
<he
brees
en
whieh
sociebiolegy
feeuses
were
<he
only
enes
(er
<he
predeninant
enes)
<ha<
influenee
afícetive-sexual
behavior.
Fur<hermere,
68

ROMANTIC
MYTI-IS
69
Table
3
Percentage
of
Accepuance
of
I)is.s’ociation
of
Love-Sex-Marriage:
Means,
Standard
Deviations,aud
Diferentes
Aeeording
lo
Sex
D¡mens¡ons
<Yo
Who
agree
Agreemen<
Men
Women
Diff.
Men
Wornen
lotal
M
SL)
M Sl)
o
M Sl)
o
u
Sex
without
Marriage
Leve
wi<hou<
Marriage
Sex
without
Love
Leve
without
Sex
82
70
63
34
66
65
1.3
30
74
67
47
32
3.74
3.57
2.91
2.57
1.23
1.21
t.44
1.31
3.98
364
3.38
2.66
1.05
1.16
1.34
1.28
946
919
940
929
3.52
3.50
2.46
2.47
1.34
1,24
1.40
1.33
976
962
976
957
8.33*
2.32*
14.1<
3.15*
Marriagewithou<Sex
Marriage
without
Leve
<8
<9
21
18
8
8
2.14
2.01
1.18
1,21
2.10
2,02
1.14
1.21
933
927
2.19
2.00
1.22
1.2<
952
973
—
Global
my<h
seGre
(separation
of
¡líe
three}
2.83 0.80 2.97
875 868
2.70 0.84
896
7.35’
Note.
Ernp<y
celís
indicate
stauiscally
nonsigniñcan<
dilferences.
*
i’
<
.0<
we
enphasize
[hat
<he
nyth
was
expressed
ir
its
mes[
radical
fern.
The
influence
of
<he
seciecultural
lactors
can
be
seen
in
the
signiflcant
correlations revealed
be[ween
belief
in [his
myth and age, r
=
.18.
p
< .01,
and
with the level
of
studies,
r
=
-.18,
p
< .01.
7
‘[he
¡narricuge
;nyth.
The
marriage
myth
was
accepted
by 85
%
of
<he
sanple.
Ihese
data
are
similar
lo
those
of
other
s[udies
carried
out
recently
abroad(Simpson
et
al.,
1986)
as well as
in
Spain
(C.I.R.E.S.,
1992).
As
with
the
rnajeíity
el
the
ether
myths,
wemen,
older
peeple,
and
<hese
with
a
lewer
level
of
s<udies
accep<ed
it
more,
p
.< .01.
8.
‘[he
couple
,nyth. Finally,
[he
ceuple
myth
was
accepted
by
almost
ah
the
sample
(over 95%).
whereas
only
0.6%
disagreed
tetally. Its
acceptance
was
se
everwhelming,
[hat it
ended
up
being
independent
of
sex, age,
er
level
of
studies.
Nevertheless,
as
social
sciences
have
shown(Fisher,
1992;
Ford
&
Beach,
1951;
Nie<e,
1989; Rosenbla[t
&
Andersen,
1981;
Wilsen
&
Nias,
1976),
<he
ceuple
is
lar
from inherent
te
human
na<ure,
nor
is
it
presen[
in
ah
cultures
(polygamy, etc.).
Once again,
Wc
can see the
imníense
power
of
wha[
we
ceuld
calI
“remantie
secialization”
en
eur
atti[udes
and
beliefs
regarding
leve
and
romantie
relatienships.
We will
new
cornrnent
en
thecorrelatiors
ebtained
be<ween
the “general
beliel
in
myhs”
seere
with
other
variables
studied
in
<he
investigation.
Specificaliy,
taking
inte
consideration
only
<he
correlations
higher
<han
.20,
general
belief
in
rny[hs
was
pesitively
correlated
wi<h:
(a)
duratien
of
the
rela[ionship, r
=
.26,
p
=
.000
(semewhat
surprisingly;maybe
it
can
be
explained
by
Bem’s
seIl
-
percep<ion
theery.
1972); (b)
feelings
of
sexual
jealousy,
r
—
.26,
p
=
.000:
and
(e)
attitude
towards
fideli<y,
r
.25.
p
—
.000.
On
<he
otherhand,
it
was
nega<ively
correlated
with:
a) separa<ion
of
sex, leve,
and
marriage,
r
=
-.29,
p
=
.000;
b)
leeling
sexual
attraction
towards
o<hers, r
=
-.28.
p
.000;
and
c)
sexual
experienee,
r
=
-.23,
p
=
.0(10.
Liízk
betweeíi
sex,
¡ove,
nuid
marríage
Conceming
<he
link
between
sex, leve, and
marriage
(see
Tables
3
and
4,
and
Figure
2),
<he
results
suggest
that, as a
rule,
Spaniards
tend
<o
accep<
tha<
leve
and sex
de
exist
outside
of
marriage
(altheugh,
of
ceurse,
percentages
are
far
frorn
100%).
1-lewever, it is
dillicu¡t
for
<be
Spanish
population
te
understand
sexual
relatiens
witheut
leve,
or
leve
witheut
sexual
relatiens,
or,
even
mere
se,
marriage
wi[hout
sez
or
without
leve.
On
<he
global
score,
obtained
by
averaging
<he
seores
en
<he
six
items,
nearly
50
%
of [he
sample
seored
below
3
(that
is,
they
disagreed
with
the
dissociation
of
the
dimensions),
lO
%
seored
in
the
explicitly medium
peint,
ane<her
lO
%
was
missing,
and
30
%
scored
aboye
3
(that
is,
[hey
agreed
with
the
dissociation
of [he
<bree
dirnensiens).
Less than
5
%
obtained
a
global
seere
of
4 or
aboye.
Table
4
Correlations hetween
aud
Age
a¡¡d
Studies
Dissociation
of
Love-Ses-Marriage
Dimensions
Age
S<udics
r
o
r
o
Sex
wi<hout
Marriage
Leve
withou<
Marriage
Sex
withour
Leve
—.40<
—.24<
—.28’
1920
1879
1914
.18*
.15<
.16*
1916
1875
1910
Luye
wi<hout Sex
—.10
1884
—
1880
Marriage
wi<hou<
Sex
Marriage
wi<hout
Leve
—
—
1883
1898
—
1879
1894
Global
L-S-M
score
(dissociation
of
<he
three)
—.30<
1762
.17<
1758
Note.
Emp<y
celís
indicate
sta<iscally
nensignifican<
differenccs.
~i’ <.01

BARRON
LÓPEZ
DE
RODA,
MARTíNEZ-INICO.
DE
PAÚL.
AND
YELA
3
Men
E
Werner
¡
¡
Leve
¡
Marriage
Sex
1
Leve Leve
¡
Sex
Pairs
of
concepts
HT
Marriage
1
Sex
Marriage
1
Sex
Figure
2,
Acceprance
of
the
dissoc¡ation
of
<he
pairs
of
concepts.
(Slash rneans
“wi<hout.)
Higher
coIurnns indicate
mere
aceeptanee
of
<he
dissociation.Lewer
colurnnsindicate
<bat
[he
dissocia<ion
of
<he
concep<s is
r~jec<ed.
Qn the
other hand.
coinciding
with
[he
resuIts
obtained
by
other
authors
(Avia,
Canille,
&
Rejo,
1990;
liuss
&
Schmitt.
1993;
Clark
&
Hatf¡eld,
1989;
Fea
et
al.,
1987;
Hendrick
&
Hendrick,
1992; Yela,
1995,
1998),
wemen
<ended
<o
perceive
such
phenomena
as
mere
clesely related than men,
with
greater
sex
differences
appearing
in
the
legitimization
el
loveless
sex
or
sex
ou[side
of
marriage.
Por
example,
63%
of
<he
men
approved
of
leveless
sexual
relationships,
as
cempared
te
33%
of
the
women;
the
difference
between
the
means
(3.38
vs.
2.46
br
men
and
women,
respectively)
wasproneunced
and
highly
significant,
p
=
.000.
As
a
rule,
we
ebserved
a
tendency
fer
older
peeple
<o
perceive
less dissocia[ion
betweenleve,
sex,
and
marriage,
r
=
-.30,
p
< .01,
especially
with
regard
te
the
lalter
[wo.
Thus,
59%
of
the
yeuths (18-25 years) legitimated
loveless
sex, as
cempared
te
25%
el
theeldestgreup
(55-65 years).
Whereas
90%
of
<he
yeuths
appreved
of
sex
outside
of
marriage,
this
percentage
dropped
te
44%
arnong
the
eldest
group
(see
Table
5).
With regard te these
aspects
(legitimizatien
of
loveless
sex,
sex
outside
el
marriage,
and
leve
witheuí
malTiage),
it
seenís
[hat
a
higher
level
of
studies
coincided
with
pernissiveness.
that
is
te
say,
greater
accep<ance
of
discenneeting
the
three
dirnensions.
Tbe
correla<ion
between
<he
“separation
el
sez-love-marriage”
and the
level
of
s[udies
xvas
r
=
.17,
p
< .01.
Ihus,
anong
college
graduates,
the
percentages
of
people
<ha[
accepted
such
separa<ions
reached
63% (leveless
sex), 85%
(sex
witheu<
narriage),
and
74%
(leve
withou[
marriage),
whereas
arnong
people
with
no
s[udies,
those
percentages
were
30%, 44%.
and
46%,
respectively.
On
the
other hand,
the
concep<s
el
Ieveless
er
sexless
marriage,
and
leve
wi¡hout
sex
were
ve¡y
uncomníen
and this did
no[
seem
te
be
iníluenced
ei[her
by
age
oc
level
of
studies,
indicating
that
it
is
a
learned
socialfactor
(see
Table
6).
Ilie
separation
be<ween
sexual relatiens,
leve,
and
narriage
was alse
modera[ely
related
with
religious
belicís
(agnostics
-
atheists’
mean
was
3.24
vs.
the
Catholics
mean.
2.74, p
=
.000) and
wi<h
religious behavior,
r
-
.28,¡~
.000.
As
in
the
case
of
romantic
myths,
we
would
like
te
highligh<
the
correIations
el
the
variable
“separation
of
sex
-
love-marriage’
wiíh
other
relevant
variables
of
<he
investigation.
In
<his
case,
we
obtained
positive
correlations
(always
higher
than
.20) with: a)
sexual
experience,
r
=
.25,
Table
5
Percentage
of
Acceptance
of
Díssoeialion
of
Love-Sex-Maíriage
According
to
Age
Range
Age
ranges
a¡íd
number
of
subjects
in
cadi
range
<8—24
25—34
35—44 45—54 55—64
Dimensions
o
= 367 n
=
487
o
398
o
= 329
o
= 366
Sex withou<
Marriage
90
87 81 61
44
Leve
wi<heut
Marriage
77
78
71
60 47
Sex withou<
Leve
59
58
52 37 25
Luye
without
Sex 34 36
35
28 24
Marriage
without
Sex 22
19
20
<7
7
Manlage
without
1~ove
16
20
22
<7
13
70
4—
3,8
—
E
3~—
o
,~
34—
o
o
~
32—
—
3—
o
~
2,8—
E
<e
~
2,6-
O)
~
2,4—
2,2—
2
Sex
¡
Marriage

ROMANTIC
MYTHS
Table
6
Pereentage
of
Acceptance
of
Dissociauion
of
Love-Ses-Marríage
According
to
Educatinnal
Leve!
hEducational
level
and number
of
subjee<s
in
each
level
Nene
Primary
Secendary
Associa<e
Degree
SemeCollege College
Degree
Dírnenstoes
u
= 223 it
= 355
778
it
= 208
u
=
<4<
u
=
<45
Sex
without
Marriage
44 57 82
91
80
85
Love
withou<
Marriage
46 54 78 78 76 74
Sex
without
Leve
30 33
31
63 45
63
Leve
without
Sex
25
27
32 39 32 37
Marriage
without
Sex
16
¡8
20 20
17 21
Marriage
withou[
Leve
<5 15 19 18
20 27
p
=
.000;
and
b)
leeling sexualattractien
<ewards
others,
r
—
.21,
p
=
.000. At
<he
same
time,
we
eb[ained
negative
correlatiens
with: (a) dura<ion
el
<he
relationship,
r
=
-.32,
p
=
.000;
(b)
belief
in
nyths,
r
=
-.29,
p
=
.000;
and
(c)
a<ti<ude
tewards
fídeiity,
r
=
-.20,
p
=
.000.
Cencluding
Comments
The
data obtained
suggest
tha<
Spanish
society
s<rengly
accepts
most
of
<he
remantie
myths
(especially
elder
people,
religious
people,
and
people
with
fewer
years
of
formal
edueatien).
At
<he
sane
time,
women
tend
te
be
slightly
more
remache
<han
men,
especialhy
cencerning
[he
impertasice
of
sexual
“loyalty”
ter
dieto. Finally,
vuith
regard
te
belicls
about
leve,
thcre
secms
<o
be
an
important trend
te
iink
leve with
sez
and
with
marriage,
and
<bis
is
also
more
proneunced
among
wernen,
elder
peeple,
religieus
people,
andpeeple
with
fewer
years
el
formal
education.
I3asically,
ah
these general
<rends
cenlirm
what
was
expec<ed,
<aking
inte account
the
roles
and
the
implicit
precedures
by
which
peeple
become
socialized
in
our
culture.
Re
dilferences
between
sexes
can also be
explained
from
a
sociobiohogical
approach,
theugh
[his
explains
more
abeut
<he
origin
el
<be
diflerences
rather
<han
<heir
maintenance
and
current
strength.
We
believe
the
censequences
el
holding
thesc
beliefs
and
niytbs
deserve
sorne
consideration.
For
instance,
[he
impact
tbat
hinking
marriage
necessariIy
[e
passienate
leve
has
en
<be
stability
of
marriage.
Several
au[hors
have theorized
abeut
the
paradex
of
<he
stabi¡i<y
of
a
social
institution
such
as
marriage,builten
<he
exis<ence
of
an
emo[ienah
link
as
vulnerable
aud
lluctuating
as
te
feeling
experienced
in
te
firs[
phases
of
<he
rehatienship
(Liebewi[z. 1983;
Mathes
&
Wise,
1983;
Ortega
y
Gasset,
1917;
Reugement,
1938;
Wihsen
& Nias,
¡976). Sorne
el
the
possiblenegative
ellec<s
<bat
[he
cennec<ien
be<ween
passien
and
marriage
coníd
produce
are:
idealization,
negauive
evaluatienof
conflicí,
internal
a<tributien
el
negative
aspec<s,
and,
aboye
ahí,
disappoinímcnt
with
<he
relationship.
The
use
el
romantie
myths
as a
standard
by
which
te
evaluate
relationships
generates
expecta[ions that
are difflcul<
te meet. The irnpessibility of maintaining
the
original
idealization
(Beek,
1988;
Graziano
&
Musser,
1982;
Kers[en
&
Kersten,
1988)
at
times
becemes
a
seurce
of
dissatisfaction
with
the
relationship,
whieh
leads
te
[ypical
negative
behaviors
(avoiding
interactien, lack
el
emotional
suppert
<owards
one’s
partner,
separate
decisien-rnaking,
decrease
in
jeint
activities,
etc.)
<bat
make
it
hard
te
main<ain
<he
relationship
(Kayser,
1993).
The
beliel
that
enletien
(passiona[e [ove) is a
necessary
aud
suff<cient
condidon
fer
maintaining
a
relationship
leads
te atti[udes
and behaviers
<Fiat
are
harreful
br
<he
stability
of
a
long-temí
relationship.
One
of
[hese attitudes
is
<he
negative
interpíetation
of
cenflict,
ja
which
confliel
is
considered
a
symptorn
of
indifíerence.
Ihese
internal
attributiens
of
<he
causes
el
<he
cenflict
(“II
we
have
preblems,
it
mus<
mean
that
we
den’t
leve
each
other”)
have
a
negative
effect
en
satislaction
(Bradbury
&
Fincbam,
1990,
Barrón
&
Martínez-Thige,
in
press). The
beliel
<ha[
“comrnunicating
about
[he
situation
el
the
relationship
is
destruc<ive,
ineffectual,
lu<ihe,
and
dangereus”
(Bax<er
&
Wilmot,
1985),
also
hindersmanagement
and
reselutien
of
contlicts.
Censequen[Iy,
in
order
te
ob[ain
satisfactien
and stability
in
hong-<erm
relationships
such
as
maniage,
[he
ceuple sheuld
restructure
and
medifypart
of
<heir
behiels
and
nyths.
en
which
they
based
<heir
initial
expec[atiens
before
<he
rehationship
began.
The
studs’
and
comprehensien
of
<his
restructuring
process
will
be
of
great
hehp
in [emnísof
<herapeutie
in<ervention.
This
is
a
prornisingtrend
br
lu<ure
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Refe
re
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e
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